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Via a pal's feed, I just watched / listened to a video of a poor-old-Arsenal-fan crying on national radio, heartbroken over his team's weekend performance / predicament. FFS, really? Get a grip (think of the refugees etc).
Think of the poor children as well for god's sake.
Yeh, heard that. Assumed it had to be some kind of Simon Brodkin-esque prank call. They replayed it on 5Live the next day and the presenters were struggling not to piss themselves.
Enjoy:
https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/arsenal-fan-breaks-down-tears-12128360
Nothing wrong with men crying; all sorts of things wrong with becoming that obsessed with eleven other men kicking a ball.
It's a valid reaction to certain things, there are often mentions of dusty eyes in the Bullheart thread for example. But in relation to football, get a grip people!
Alright I thought this was going to be some big piece about male macho stereotypes and how men need an outlet of emotion too and it's okay to have feelings etc etc but that is pretty weak, man the **** up.
Arsenal fan ≠ grown man
all sorts of things wrong with becoming that obsessed with eleven other men kicking a ball.
Unless it's one of yours.
Fair point, well made.
But it's awful though, isn't it? They're in the latter stages of a European competition, sixth place in the league, current FA Cup holders, financially solvent...
Actually, I'm welling up just thinking about their plight.
Get a grip (think of the refugees etc).
Should be....think of the referees.
all sorts of things wrong with becoming that obsessed with eleven other men kicking a ball.
Agreed. As hard as I’ve tried, I just can’t excited about 6.5 a side football.
nealglover...Just can’t excited about 6.5 a side football.
Wouldn't that be 13 men? Or do they have to have one none man per team?
As long as it stops at crying, I'm ok with it.
I had never been into football but started taking my son a couple of years ago as he loves it.
I have started to enjoy going to the matches this season but still do not understand how angry and upset some fans get when we lose or concede a goal.
Amélie Poulain aime.
Playing devils advocate here, surely though it's all relative to who you are.
The guy on the phone is someone who may not have anything else in his life, as in no family or social circle and to him football is everything. To him Arsenal is everything so I can understand why he can become so emotionally attached to something and if anything I felt some compassion towards him,
Personally I like football but in no way to that degree but I do understand how something can make someone feel that way, to a lot of people though football is certainly a trivial matter but whatever your passion is I guess.
#wend-eye-ballers
often mentions of dusty eyes
You can say crying it's ok you know
It’s lacriminal
I had to google it, but that's very good. As are the Swanson quotes.
You can say crying it’s ok you know
It was a direct reference to how other people say it on emotional threads. Last time I cried was over a TV Show, but I think there was an underlying driver then! Crying is fine for all people, although I have probably cried more about pets than people.
As hard as I’ve tried, I just can’t excited about 6.5 a side football.
I was rather assuming that a distraught Arsenal fan didn't have the same level of obsession for whichever other team they happened to be playing at the time. Maybe I'm wrong and he feels the same about all teams, and spends a harrowing hour each Saturday afternoon reacting like this every fifteen seconds as Dickie Davis reads out the scores from the teletype.
To him Arsenal is everything so I can understand why he can become so emotionally attached to something and if anything I felt some compassion towards him,
I can understand if you're emotionally attached to a cat, and it gets run over, you cry. If you support one of the most successful teams in the history of the Premier League and have simply lost four games in a row, two of them against the league leaders, then I'm struggling to see life through his eyes a little.
[i]perchypanther wrote:[/i]
all sorts of things wrong with becoming that obsessed with eleven other men kicking a ball.
Unless it’s one of yours.
Is it allowed to cry in that case?
One single tear to establish dramatic tension before exacting bloody revenge is permissible.
Did no one click on the link about that Brazilian referee?
Whaaaat in God's name is that all about?
Can't believe they attached such a graphic link either.
Aren't you all just the butchest of the butch?
Stiff upper lip, jumpers for goalposts, isn't it..mmmm.. woman's place is in the kitchen, don't like these darkies much, taking over the place, sorry, for a moment there I thought we were in the 1970s.
Men who don't cry? What's that about? A bit weird, that is.
Grown men crying?
Oh wait, you mean the Brexit thread...
Can’t remember who said it, but always loved this.
”somebody told me to man up, so I painted my face like a flag and cried when another man couldn’t kick a ball properly”
Crying over any game (if you are older than twelve) should be met with derision.
I still can't get through the last bit of DIY SOS without needing to blub a bit.
people who think that displays of emotion, when made by men, should be met with derision.. should be met with derision.
If anyone thinks I'm just being a nob for the sake of it, here's something that happens (partly) because boys are brought up being told it's not "manly" to show emotion, and in particular "big boys don't cry". Well, maybe they don't, but some of them kill themselves instead. Yeah, I know, boo ****ing hoo.
https://www.samaritans.org/about-us/our-research/facts-and-figures-about-suicide
people who think that displays of emotion, when made by men, should be met with derision.. should be met with derision.
If anyone thinks I’m just being a nob for the sake of it, here’s something that happens (partly) because boys are brought up being told it’s not “manly” to show emotion, and in particular “big boys don’t cry”. Well, maybe they don’t, but some of them kill themselves instead. Yeah, I know, boo **** hoo.
https://www.samaritans.org/about-us/our-research/facts-and-figures-about-suicide
With respect ed, they aren't the same thing. Grown men cry at soccer because they invest a lot of their lives in the teams to the point where it forms part of their identity. They refer to the team's achievements as "we" or "us", they wear the team colours to inform strangers as to their allegiances and perhaps most importantly, they develop rivalries and conflict with other teams. When they cry it's because they've completely lost perspective as to the importance of the event in relation to their own lives.
Depression and suicide on the other hand, well there are seemingly almost limitless contributing factors on a variety of spectrums that can lead to, contribute to or trigger those. Anything and everything from ill health, bad luck, failed relationships, lonliness to hormone irregularities caused by sub traumatic brain injuries in earlier life and probably many combinations of the above and more.
Raising boys and men to suppress their emotions and never discuss how they feel is wrong, but raising boys to learn to control or even ignore their emotions is essential to make functioning men who can actually "man up" should the need arise for whatever reason.
people who think that displays of emotion, when made by men, should be met with derision.. should be met with derision.
We have a winner.
I have no interest in football but I cry like a 6-year old girl with a grazed knee at the end of Armageddon. Who am I to judge? Boys / men are conditioned from an early age to suppress emotions and that's not healthy.
raising boys to learn to control or even ignore their emotions is essential to make functioning men who can actually “man up” should the need arise for whatever reason.
That's a candidate for the biggest load of horseshit I've ever read on STW, and we have posters who have their own hashtags. Being emotional and being a "functional man" are not mutually exclusive and if you think otherwise then you're part of the problem. And suggesting that men aren't real men unless they've been taught to "control their emotions" is monumentally patronising.
How do you feel about women who need to "woman up" occasionally? Should they also learn the same controls, or does it not matter because what are they doing out of the kitchen anyway?
What he said
The only thing that annoys me is that sport is the only place where we ever see men cry, I have never cried over a sporting event but I wont mock those who do . The inability of men to articulate emotions, or being mocked when they do, is a far greater problem than those crying over things I have not cried about.
Cougar
That’s a candidate for the biggest load of horseshit I’ve ever read on STW, and we have posters who have their own hashtags.
Funny how you managed to completely miss or ignore the part of my post which says "Raising boys and men to suppress their emotions and never discuss how they feel is wrong ".
Being emotional and being a “functional man” are not mutually exclusive and if you think otherwise then you’re part of the problem. And suggesting that men aren’t real men unless they’ve been taught to “control their emotions” is monumentally patronising.
Cougar, I used a colloquialism in a normal way, I didn't think it would prompt you to lose your shit. Allow me to give you an example of what I meant. If my son hurts himself or is sad for some reason I won't punish him, tell him not to be sad or tell him to man up, I'll ask him what's wrong. However, when he's rolling around on the floor of his nursery group screaming and crying because he doesn't want to go in I'll tell him to stop acting like a baby and go join his friends in nursery. Hopefully this approach will lead to him being able to discuss his emotions but also be able to control them.
How do you feel about women who blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Who said anything about women? We were discussing grown men crying. Saying something about A MAN does not automatically infer the opposite is true or even relevant regarding ALL WOMEN.
Funny how you managed to completely miss or ignore
He quoted it and commented on it. Were you trying to prove you could do even more "horseshit"?
I didn’t think it would prompt you to lose your shit.
Another? He commented on your post - have you lost your shit or just replied?
He quoted it and commented on it. Were you trying to prove you could do even more “horseshit”?
Did he indeed. Go back and read it again, there's a good boy.
Funny how you managed to completely miss or ignore the part of my post
I didn't miss it, I agreed with it (and probably should've said so). It was just totally contradicted by the rest of that sentence.
I didn’t think it would prompt you to lose your shit.
I'm fully in control of my shit, being a well-adjusted adult. Thanks though.
I won’t... tell him to man up... I’ll tell him to stop acting like a baby
There's a world of difference between acting your age and acting like a "man." Why is this gender-specific?
Hopefully this approach will lead to him being able to discuss his emotions but also be able to control them.
I genuinely don't see how "stop crying" is encouragement to discuss emotions. Apologies if I've missed something here.
Who said anything about women?
I did, just then. Does the same apply? What would you tell a hypothetical daughter in the same situation?
Saying something about A MAN does not automatically infer the opposite is true or even relevant regarding ALL WOMEN.
Random CAPS is always the hallmark of a solid argument. Not quite sure why it's "A" man but "ALL" women, mind.
I'm weeping tears of despair at this thread now.
As is my right as a man.
I dont need to as I am not the one with perception, comprehension or recall problems.
Cougar
I didn’t miss it, I agreed with it (and probably should’ve said so). It was just totally contradicted by the rest of that sentence.
It didn't contradict it - you ignored half the post then ascribed the worst possible intentions to the rest of it. We all control or suppress our emotions constantly, all day every day. The idea that controlling your emotions, or ignoring them in the short term to achieve something is now somehow taboo?
There’s a world of difference between acting your age and acting like a “man.” Why is this gender-specific?
What's the thread title again?
I genuinely don’t see how “stop crying” is encouragement to discuss emotions. Apologies if I’ve missed something here.
Do you have kids Cougar? There's a time and a place for discussing emotions. Mid tantrum doesn't work very well in my experience.
I did, just then. Does the same apply? What would you tell a hypothetical daughter in the same situation?
Hypotheitcal daughter? My daughter will do just fine. I treat her differently from my son because they are different people with different personalities.
Not quite sure why it’s “A” man but “ALL” women, mind.
Because the only man I can actually try to influence is my son. I can quote platitudes and cliches all day long but I probably can't change anyone else. But you took this to be somehow indicative of me thinking the opposite about all women.
I just watched / listened to a video of a poor-old-Arsenal-fan crying on national radio, heartbroken over his team’s weekend performance / predicament. FFS, really? Get a grip
im sorry, I realise I’ve let myself, my family and even STW down.....but I’ve been an Arsenal fan for nearly 50 years and that mad Frenchman is killing our club!
All you need to do to understand this is:
a) check out the ticket prices at Arsenal
b) see how much Ozil gets paid
c) watch some of Arsenal’s recent performances, noting Ozil’s contribution
i think I’d have a little cry. Then i’d get really, really, really, really ****ing angry and consider murderizing a French Pensioner
you ignored half the post
And then admitted that was a mistake.
There’s a time and a place for discussing emotions.
Fair enough. When are you encouraging him to discuss his emotions outside of tantrums? You said, "I’ll tell him to stop acting like a baby and go join his friends in nursery. Hopefully this approach will lead to him being able to discuss his emotions" so that's all I had to go on.
I treat her differently from my son because they are different people with different personalities.
Different personalities or different genders? This is all well and good but you're still dodging the question as to whether the same rules apply to girls as they do to boys.
But you took this to be somehow indicative of me thinking the opposite about all women.
For the second time now, that's your inference. "A" vs "ALL", I literally quoted your own words there.
Nice to hear a bit of passion in the callers voice ... in this day and age. Some might feel it is a little much over a football team ... but hey ho that’s his passion.
I treat her differently from my son because they are different people with different personalities.
Different personalities or different genders? This is all well and good but you’re still dodging the question as to whether the same rules apply to girls as they do to boys.
They have different personalities. How much of that is down to gender, I can't say but given how stereo-typically some of there behavior falls neatly into gender stereotypes, I'd say a fair bit. I can give you examples as much as I find it somewhat uncomfortable to discuss something like that on a forum. We've had that thread several times recently but I'm happy to go through the motions again if you want to start a new one.
For the second time now, that’s your inference. “A” vs “ALL”, I literally quoted your own words there.
If you want to give me the benefit, you can re-read my earlier post in the context of me thinking about raising a four year old boy as a well rounded person and not a slave to his emotions. You can chose to be charitable in your interpretation, or not, as with your initial reaction. Either way I do not care and my conscience is clear.
Jeepers! Predictable row I guess.
to go back to crying at sport - totally ridiculous. I am heavily into my rugby to the point where I actually shake with the adrenaline and disappointments like the Scotland / Wales game can make me really unhappy and grumpy but to get to the point of crying? No way jose and I am in contact with my emotions and do cry at things worth crying for occasionally
Lawrence Dallaglio would be / was in tears just singing the national anthem. We all have different trigger points.
Uncle Jezza - is it not just a case of rugby fans using all their emotions up dealing with their repressed homosexuality? 😂
You can chose to be charitable in your interpretation, or not,
I'd rather that you were clear in what you were saying so that no interpretation was necessary and there was no risk of misunderstanding.
raising a four year old boy as a well rounded person and not a slave to his emotions.
Sure. Are you similarly raising your daughter as a well rounded person who is not a slave to her emotions? When she cries do you tell her to stop being a baby?
I cried tears of pure joy when I found out this week was national pie week. Then Mrs Binners handed me a Wigan kebab.... a steak pie on a barm, and I went full Gwyneth....
Jesus Christ, that got out of hand quickly. To clarify my original post, I suffer with depression (badly) and cry and show emotions . All that being said, you cry because a team lose at a game and you're older than ten then you deserve to be laughed at. To bring suicide in to a conversation about a grown arse man crying over a game is ridiculous even for this place.
people who think that displays of emotion, when made by men, should be met with derision.. should be met with derision.
Oh .....and I said people who cry because somebody else lost at aa game
Oh course the chap on the radio phone in might suffer from depression or mental health issue’s etc.....or he may not and for him Arsenal are the most important thing in his life.
He could, then again he could be like the multitude of people i work with who think when their team (it's not their team) loses, it's the equivalent of losing a family member. My post was a light hearted jest, but as usual this place has a sense of humour malfunction and it devolved in to the usual 'people making arguments out of absolutely **** all' i think it's about time I flounced. This place has become way too melodramatic
If you need a shoulder to.... well you know what I am getting at ( I am just joking I promise).
The guy on the phone is someone who may not have anything else in his life, as in no family or social circle and to him football is everything. To him Arsenal is everything so I can understand why he can become so emotionally attached to something and if anything I felt some compassion towards him,
I sincerely hope that you are a shrink/medic/nurse/vet etc as the world needs more empathetic people doing what comes naturally to them.
Well said.
Only on STW could a thread taking the piss out of me for crying over my football team turn into a bun fight over mental health issues, parental responsibility and the like! Hilarious!
Don't worry Rockape.... I feel your pain. I had to endure 2 seasons of watching a Van Gaal squad that involved a sort of reverse-rugby where it was forbidden to pass it forwards. Then there was Moyes.
I'd have cried too but that would have entailed staying awake. At least you can content yourself with rousing choruses of 'you're not fit to wear the shirt' before bursting into tears
It’s sad isn’t it? Almost makes you want to cry
Trying to steer back onto the subject of men crying. Here are a selection of things that have made me well up / cry.
Daughter hugging mother scene in Uncle Buck
DIY SOS reveals.
My son being lovely.
Thinking about my dad.
Thinking about good times when I was younger.
Stories about mis-treated cats.
The song Puff the Magic Dragon.
Theres a whole lot of shit flying about in my head that needs to come out....
Don’t worry Rockape…. I feel your pain. I had to endure 2 seasons of watching a Van Gaal squad that involved a sort of reverse-rugby where it was forbidden to pass it forwards. Then there was Moyes.
I’d have cried too but that would have entailed staying awake. At least you can content yourself with rousing choruses of ‘you’re not fit to wear the shirt’ before bursting into tears
Oh FFS, look at yourselves.
Have you SEEN Reading this season? Achieving the impossible, being so unutterably shit, but somehow still managing to pick up a point every now and then sufficient that Stam stays in post.
I cry at all sorts; sad and happy. Is that even worse to cry happy tears. You could have lacri-surfed when Hoy won the Kierin in 2012 and became the greatest...... only trouble was that i was at work at the time so everyone saw it.
There are a lot of things to cry about that's for sure! I inherited my crying from my Dad who would sit in front of the TV mopping his eyes with his hankercheif as he watched something completely not sad! Once, when I was watching Dallas, he walked into the room, stood watching some lachrymose moment and promptly got his handkerchief out! I couldn't believe it!
Now my kids watch me if ever The Sound of Music is on, as tears roll down my face watching one particular emotional moment! Watching Arsenal isn't emotional these days, but its definitely bloody sad!
Come on - own up - who hasn't shed a few tears over the new forum....???
Oh FFS, look at yourselves.
Have you SEEN Reading this season?
One of my mates is a Reading fan (he's a southern immigrant) and we all went to the pub to watch the Reading v Huddersfield play off. I don't know about crying, by the end of that shambolic bore-fest most of us had started self-harming with broken pint glasses.
On the crying front, prior to having kids I had a heart of stone. You could have shot a kitten at point blank range, right in front of me, every 30 seconds, and I'd just step over the blood-stained balls of fluff to get to the bar. Since having kids I can stand in the kitchen blubbing at a moderately unfortunate happening on the Archers. God knows what it is parenthood does to your hormones! I even bought myself a new axe last summer, and thats not even helped my GGGGRRRRRR manliness testosterone levels. Bah!
One of my mates is a Reading fan (he’s a southern immigrant) and we all went to the pub to watch the Reading v Huddersfield play off. I don’t know about crying, by the end of that shambolic bore-fest most of us had started self-harming with broken pint glasses.
Ah, they were proper halcyon days compared to now.
I cried tears of pure joy when I found out this week was national pie week. Then Mrs Binners handed me a Wigan kebab…. a steak pie on a barm, and I went full Gwyneth….
Weep for the joy of my Birthday pie-buts.
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Binned, same here, kids have turned me soft. I well up at pretty much any kids film I watch now, Coco was embarrassing for all of in the screening, I think I welled up during an episode of the Thundermans the other day.
I've pretty much given up on watching sport as I'll cry for the winners and losers even if I have absolutely no interest in the event.
Luckily Gary Megson killed my interest in Football a few years back not felt the need to phone in 5live about Forest since 🙂
This thread is another example of why STW is not a nice place to visit.
I can't help but wonder how much this and similar sh!tfest threads damage the Singletrack brand image.
Get over yourself.
Mind the door doesn't catch the back of your head on the way out.
Twits
Luckily Gary Megson killed my interest in Football a few years back not felt the need to phone in 5live about Forest since
😀
This thread is another example of why STW is not a nice place to visit.
I can’t help but wonder how much this and similar sh!tfest threads damage the Singletrack brand image.
Can you clarify whether it’s the pro crying at games or the anti crying at games posters that makes it not nice to visit?
edit - crying at games other people (strangers) are playing. We’ve all cried when a game of Monopoly exceeds the nine hour mark
This thread is another example of why STW is not a nice place to visit.I can’t help but wonder how much this and similar sh!tfest threads damage the Singletrack brand image.
i would quote if i could be bothered to find out how to. Agree. I associate the crap on this forum to be mirrored in the magazine, the main reason I will not be a subscriber.
I think it best to compile a list of when it is or isn't acceptable for a man to cry.
Unacceptable: Discussing football.
Acceptable: The end of Toy Story 3
The death of Radar Intercept Officer Nick "Goose" Bradshaw
I think that's all the movies covered.
Watership Down and the bit in ET when he goes grey and falls over in the water
Oldtalent - you think the twoddle that idiots like me post on the forum will be mirrored in the magazines content?
You’re not a journalist yourself then? 😂
By the same logic I once knew a bloke who drove a Volvo who was a right arse, therefore I would never even consider buying a Volvo
Anyway.... i’m sure that along with everyone else, i’m Glad you keep on coming on here with your thoughtful and incisive contributions. Do keep them coming, won’t you?
This site has Binners-friendly content and a name that would sum up half the threads on here.