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I’ve known for a bit actually, so we’re at 16 weeks now and so excited!! Both our works know.
We’ve spent 2.5 years doing a doer upper house from literally the start of covid as was always the plan to have the house nearly finished before we started trying, then 3 weeks later BINGO!
I wasn’t prepared for the fact morning sickness for her is ALL DAY sickness and tiredness but I’ve got used to it and she can’t even smell food cooking without wanting to be sick so I’ve cooked for around 2 months now 🤣. I’ve got used to having half her tea’s as she doesn’t want to eat certain things, and just generally being very aware as to how she is and what I can do to help. The amount of foods she can’t eat surprised me too but we’ve just adapted.
I think both v shocked how quick it happened as we both MTB and Road bike and have had to change plans of Les Gets for my birthday in Aug as she’ll be 2 months off then.
Just want to see what others have done, so far I attended the first midwife appt and then the first scan and 12 week scan, apparently we have the wriggliest baby they have ever seen, there’s a 16 week midwife appt today but I can’t see the need for me to be at this one but definitely going to all the scans.
This is so she gets time with the midwife on her own too, do people tend to agree?
She works in X-ray in the hospital so is on light duties away from X-rays etc and was v lucky as the check for certain tests literally wouldn’t have happened if she wasn’t NHS as we had the midwife appt locally but didn’t want to use most local hosp as she’s locum’d there before. It’s bad to get to for us and she works at a different hosp and I think the transferral of all docs and logistical time things took meant that if we hadn’t have intervened and her work colleagues hadn’t jumped into top gear then we’d have missed the scan for the special tests they do.
We have a cat too who wakes us up at 6 or before each day because his food comes first always…. Sometimes during the night as he’s brought us a mouse which means I need to immediately down any drink I have on bedside table to catch the mouse with 🤣
We aim to take baby with us on bikes when old enough as we literally love biking, from what I understand I need to make the most of sleep and biking now and get the red/black out runs my system for a bit at least!
Sounds like we need to start stockpiling items early as a bit extra in the shopping won’t be noticed that way.
I read about a book for blokes in an 11 year old thread, anything else I need to be aware of? 😬
Don't listen to the naysayers about "ha ha you're never having fun again". Priorities change but you'll discover other fun things (not all baby related). One thing for sure, life will never be the same but changes more for some than others.
Congrats and enjoy 😄
As Mark said. Life will change. But I've not missed doing my usual biking and fishing as much as I thought I would. Mainly because I just want to spend time with my daughter now who is 9 months old. She is the most amazing little thing ever. I still get out every now and then though. Your priorities change and you find other things to do. We love our walks plus have a few wildlife parks near us that she loves.
Haha thanks, as you say I’m reading plenty of people saying it’s just different but they wouldn’t change it for the world and it’s the best thing that ever happened to them.
We’re both v settled anyway as I think that has to be important to have a solid foundation, was surprised to hear most of my friends say “she never really had morning sickness” whereas she’s literally spent most of the time upto now all the time feeling like that, maybe the fact she’s only 5’3 has something to do with it?
One thing that stunned us is the price of childcare but work are very good so sounds like we can save a chunk with me collecting kidder at 4 before the prices skyrocket!
Congratulations 🙂
My only advice would be to remember you're still a couple, and not just baby-support crew. Make time for yourselves as a couple, dump the baby with a grandparent and go out for a meal, that kind of thing. It's far too easy to get into a routine that 100% revolves around the kid, and forget that you also have a life.
Haha thanks, as you say I’m reading plenty of people saying it’s just different but they wouldn’t change it for the world and it’s the best thing that ever happened to them.
This, mostly. In terms of advice, you'll find your own way.
Congratulations to you both.
All people seem to experience pregnancy differently. I wasn't massively involved - i read the bits of the books my wife recommended and went to scans ... and births. My wife breezed through her pregnancies but then had awful births.
We used to talk about how life changed after kids and concluded that you just have to change your expectations about how much you can get done on any given day - and try not to get too stressed about it.
Best things we bought were:
https://www.macpac.com.au/macpac-possum-child-carrier/114437.html?cgid=kids-packs_carriers#start=2
and
https://www.bicyclesuperstore.com.au/products/croozer-kid-for-2-bicycle-trailer-mint
This way my kids were immediately introduced to walking and riding (in fact we had to take the indoor trike away from the first one because he was riding it so much he wasn't learning to walk!)
Congratulations, Mogrim has it nailed on, don't forget why you got together and make some time for you as a couple. You may need to drag mrschrisyork away the first time as there's some powerful hormones to be overcome.
You'll find what works for you, good luck and enjoy the ride.
Congratulations!
Life will change hugely. Almost entirely for the better. Sleep and "me time" and "us time" will be a distant memory. Tiredness - lets be honest, utter exhaustion - will make every little niggle and disagreement feel like the end of your world, and then there's hormones all over the place.
But it's been so worth it. We've been lucky, we have two remarkably well adjusted teenagers starting to find their way in the world. Most of our local circle of friends we would never have met without the connection through our kids, and we've got involved in various sports and activity groups we wouldn't have done without them.
You will have to make sacrifices and compromises with your own plans and time, maybe careers, to fit it all in. And don’t be surprised if they don't love cycling as much as you do. Mine enjoy an occasional ride, but their interests, skills and priorities lay elsewhere, so we've supported them, and tried not to force our own interests on them.
Great words of advice, thank you and yes of course we have a very strong bond and will make sure we have the odd meal out with child looked after by Mum/Dad etc, I just bought an indoor cam so even if she is missing said child, can just open the app and see how the mum/dad are getting on if in the right room. Only one cam, it’s not a big brother set. If kid does enjoy cycling the plans are to get a van and go on adventures. Already looking at the 2nd hand Specialized balance bikes with proper tyres! The dream is the kid gets a Commencal, full face, pads and shreds!
When we were in Tignes we met a couple and kid on the trails, kid had fullface helmet, proper bike and was riding as hard as the parents 🤘
As you say though the love will just be there to support them in whatever they want to do and the macride/trailer will be getting bought!
Congratulations!
Good advice above, just remember all kids are different and it will constantly surprise you as they find their own ways. Also don't treat baby books/the internet as gospel, all kids are different, trust your instincts 🙂
Congratulations
Like everyone else has said live will change, it's for the better kids bring joy into your life that you couldn't imagine.
My top tips don't worry about buying expensive baby clothes they are happy in hand me downs and second hand they grow so quickly.
Stock up on baby wipes, nappies we found Aldi and Lidl nappies were better than premium brands, Out and about Nippers are great buggys.
Book your paternity leave well in advance it realy helps to bond with the baby having Dad around and your wife will appreciate the extra help in the first weeks.
Congratulations...
It's the hardest and best thing we've ever done. And that applies not just to the baby and infant stage...
Eldest arrived home from Uni yesterday, and I looked at the three of them and just couldn't get my head around where the time has flown... Enjoy.
Congratulations. More than anything else, the best advice so far in this thread is @Paul-B's:
Also don’t treat baby books/the internet as gospel, all kids are different, trust your instincts
You'll find your own way and what works for you; don't go aspiring to a lot of you see online as most of it's bollocks. Kind of like STW in general I guess.
Life (aka biking) now goes as follows:
> Kiddie trailer
>> Mac Ride
>>> Balance bike
>>>> Trax tow rope
🙂
Just read the 'how do kids do it' poo thread and that's all the prep you'll need.
Not much can be planned, literally billions of people have managed it, grab freebie stuff when it crops up because they'll soon grow into it.
Life (aka biking) now goes as follows:
> Kiddie trailer
>> Mac Ride
>>> Balance bike
>>>> Trax tow rope
>>>>> What Islabike
>>>>>> When to get FS vs light HT
>>>>>>> See the Weeksy racing thread
Les Gets you say? Children you say?
By three they could do the Chavannes red on a LOCT (think MacRide) with me on a Five.
They were doing local stuff on a WeeRide far sooner
It’s not as long as you think.
And congratulations.
Conratulations to you both.
It's the hardest, but also the most rewarding job ever being a parent.
Best bit of info anyone ever passed on to me is this: 'It gets easier' and it's true. Every day is slightly better than the one before.
Will echo what Matt and a11y said above. The geek out opportunities for child-related cycling stuff are amazing. Thule do an awesome infant sling for their trailers.
<stealth ad>we've some things for sale on fleabay right now (co sleep cot, buggy/travelsystem, sling carrier thing like a bjorn but not, weeride, did have a papouse but that's gone)</stealthad>
Congrats. best advice ... don't panic. Babies are easy: feed it, clean it, don't let it over heat.
Your outlook will change rapidly too:
After 1 week you'll be like "oh no baby has dribbled on me I'd better change my t-shirt".
After 1 month you'll be like "oh no baby has been sick on me I'll wet wipe it off".
After 1 year you'll be "gah I've got shit on my jeans, I'll just rub it in".
There is something about bathwater. If I remember it I will let you know.
Congratulations 🙂
Echoing what others have said the pregnancy can be very different for different people. Also the children of course, so take all the inevitable heaps of "helpful" advice you get with a pinch of salt.
Some will be helpful, irrelevant, mildly useful, obvious, condescending or amazing. My advice is smile and nod for everything but do your own thing!
anything else I need to be aware of?
*evil cackle*
https://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/how-do-kids-do-it/
It's an adventure, honestly, everything has a different slant to it with kids, the first couple of years are hard, lack of sleep, grumpiness, trying to work together, etc, etc, and of course in that time the baby doesn't really do much, just lies or sits there, then they start moving and you then start doing a lot more interaction, then after that it's just chaos!
If your wife hasn't already joined groups, then it's one of the best things, it gives her a support network, folk to talk to now, and after you have the baby, people to go for walks/coffee/etc with that'll hopefully make things easier overall, she can have more than one group as well, after the birth she'll hopefully then have a few mummy friends that are local.
Congratulations!
Some good advice above. The most accurate description I've heard was 'its like being smashed in the face with a hammer.... but in a really, really good way'
And believe me, in what feels like about 6 months time they'll be doing their A levels and you'll be wondering how the **** that happened 😂
Congratulations.
Our first is 10 months old and I swear I've aged 10 years in that time. Currently sitting in the office struggling to keep my eyes open. He went through 3 outfits before we left the house this morning. The first one he shitted through his sweatpants and the second he vomited porridge all over it. I've been late for work every day this week and nursery is costing us over £900 a month.
Don't want to repeat what everyone has said above but yeah, it's mostly good. I'd honestly rather come home and roll around on the floor and play peekaboo for 2 hours than go out on the bike or to the pub. He's happy and healthy and he changes every day so it feels like time is flying.
Take lots of pictures and videos of them wriggling and gurgling because they change so fast.
Congratulations! Having a kid was the best thing I've ever done. It made me look at life in an entirely different way - I was no longer the most important thing to me. Sharing experiences with kids and seeing the sheer joy on their faces is the greatest thing ever.
The first two years were very hard for us (he didn't sleep through until aged 2), but its been plain sailing since then.
I genuinely feel sorry for folks who can't / don't want children. Its such a massive buzz that can't be replaced by endless holidays / nice cars / big houses / other stuff that people without kids rave about.
I've even gone from being a devout mountain biker to a roadie, so I can spend more time with the family. And I NEVER saw that happening.
Congrats its ace being a dad
my two peneth....
1)sleep now while you can, enjoy those lie ins!
2)Prepare for the unexpected: as you are learning every pregnancy is different, every delivery is different, every baby is different
3)Theres a lot of pressure on mums to have the perfect pregnancy, the perfect birth, breast feed straight away, but see point 2
4) once baby is here, try and hammer out a routine, they generally only cry for 3 reasons,, revolving around- eat- pooh- sleep, so get into that routine wake them, feed them, change them, repeat
a routine is good for them, because they know what to expect and its good for you because eat-poo-sleep is also a requirement for you and its easy to forget that!
5) teamwork, you & the wife need to be on the same page on routines, discipline and being honest if you are finding it tough
6)make use of parents, inlaws etc, gets some babysitting have a night out with just the 2 of u
7) cry down technique, look it up when theyre old enough it helps
8) youll probably definitely make loads of mistakes, its always tough with a the first
9) buy stuff second hand, because they grow out of it quick and some of it is silly expensive, research well, buggys are a nightmare, they are big, unweildy, expensive, hard to clean, we went with Baby Jogger as you can fold them flat with one hand and actually fold down flat for travel/ storage
Resist the urge to buy lots of gadgets and be wary of how much space they take up
10) thats said........
https://www.tommeetippee.com/en-gb/product/perfect-prep-machine its like a coffee maker for bottles, you dont need it as such, but until your standing in the kitchen at 3am in your boxers with the wife swearing at you as your trying to cool down a bottle of milk to placate a screaming baby, you just wont know, (Even if you are breast feeding, bottle feeding can help give your wife a break now & again) buy s/h sell for what you bought it
https://www.babybjorn.co.uk/baby-bouncers/ you can get ones that vibrate and sing songs, but this is THE best, wraps around and holds them snug, folds flat, adjustable positions, easy to clean, buy s/h sell for what you bought it
https://www.croozer.com/en/croozer-kid-keeke-2-stone-grey ours saw so much use, buy s/h sell for what you bought it
other than that enjoy, kids are brilliant
edit- everyone has advice for parents, feel free to ignore them, including me!
Congratulations!
Listen to the medical professionals; ignore advice/comments from everyone else.
I'm not a medical pro so feel free to ignore my comment!
MarkyG82+1.
You can definitely still have fun as long as you support each other. I still cycled and went to gigs and my wife still went swimming and to the gym. Rule no. 1 applies as it does to nearly everything - don’t be a dick and selfish.
As for appointment attendance - take your steer from your partner - there are no hard and fast rules.
Two pieces of advice. Don’t be a workaholic and spend as much time as you can 1 on 1 with child.
Congratulations! To add to the great advice above, make sure your hospital bag is packed well in advance. We were booked in for a C Section as our little one was breech, everything was spread out next to the bag to be packed when they decided to come a week earlier. Your other half won't thank you for the haphazard 1am packing when they need something out of it after the birth!
Enjoy the early times, during the pregnancy I was looking forward to future biking and adventures outside but now they're here the last 10 months have gone too fast. It's both the hardest and most rewarding things I've had to do, they'll drive you mad then smile at you to make it all go away.
As someone also said above, support groups. We did the NCT courses and the most useful thing to come out of it was our WhatsApp groups, to have other mums going through the same things we can't understand to talk to in the wee hours has been invaluable for my partner!
If you want some light hearted reading to prepare you, check out "Dummy" by Matt Coyne of manvsbaby fame. Funny and informative!
Congrats from the hubby of another radiographer..
No advice other than children can be hard work, and some days they are the most frustrating things possible..... but you will never love something so much, and your life will change for the better.
oh... and in the weeks leading up to birth, batch cook and freeze.... and don't let your mother in law try to move in (know that one from experience!)
Congrats!
To expand on kimbers' #2 and 3 - there's loads of rose-tinted guff you'll see or read about fathers bonding immediately, loads don't. They can be gormless, frustrating things in the early months and you're not emotionally broken just because your heart isn't overflowing with love for them from the first second, it does come in time.
Basic practical things - if you've got friends who are already parents then ask them what they found most useful (or got left in the back of a cupboard). Resist the temptation to prepare a fancy nursery room, they'll be in with you for a while to start with and a couple of change mats to hand is often easier than going to a specific room with the special change table. Buy a new car seat but as said, secondhand is best for most other things if you can. We went through at least 6 pushchairs over the years with two kids, just having different sizes/folds/storage is handy for different things, I'd buy and sell just to try different ones.
Eldest arrived home from Uni yesterday, and I looked at the three of them and just couldn’t get my head around where the time has flown… Enjoy.
I'm sat outside a cafe at a local garden centre with a small animal petting farm. A 2 year old has just been near me looking at the lambs and chatting to his mum, a mirror of how my eldest used to be when we brought him along at that age. He's nearly finished his first year at uni.
God I'm old. But proud.
Book we found useful was called your baby week by week :
https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/Your_Baby_Week_By_Week/Msv0U59g1Q4C?hl=en&gbpv=0
Key info in this book as I remember it: tells you about sleep regressions. Just when we thought we'd got the kids' routines licked and we were on top of things, then went through some sort of developmental leap that put us on the back foot. A quick consultation with the book generally said this was to be expected at the time our babies were at. And perhaps what to do about it.
Would recommend NCT or similar for making friends, mostly for MrsTeapot who needed other people who have small babies to hang out with in the day time.
Baby one was breastfed, we waited until 10 weeks to try her on a bottle because we'd read/been told something about nipple confusion where the kid learns they can get more milk and faster from a bottle, therefore resulting in them giving up on the breast. By 10 weeks baby one wasn't having any of it and refused the bottle, making our lives difficult as baby one could only be left with dad for as long as went between feeds. Got in there way earlier with baby two (5-6 weeks).
benman
Free Member
I genuinely feel sorry for folks who can’t / don’t want children. Its such a massive buzz that can’t be replaced by endless holidays / nice cars / big houses / other stuff that people without kids rave about.
You shouldn't. Not everyone's version of happiness is the same.
Great advice, thank you.
Well we’ve done exactly that, decided to try Vinted for some outfits for little un and I’m stunned at the quality of it and the cost too!
We were in mama’s and papa’s laughing at prams costing over £1000 and saw an elephant top for £25 and I even said to her that’s not bad, we got home and she’s now bought and had delivered the same item for about £3 and it really is like new.
So we now have a load of clothing, also a maxi-cosy Quinny 3 wheel pram with proper tyres for £75 off marketplace. Even said that we likely wouldn’t be using it much as baby will either be strapped to one of us or in the backpack we just got for free for full on Deuter baby one with stand, shade etc…
Has stunned me how nobody wants anything or hardly anything for things and of course when we’re done we’ll do the same and pass on those savings to someone else. Don’t get me wrong we have the money to buy everything new but there’s no point doing it…. Think we have around 10 outfits now that probably cost £30 for everything. Madness!
Just looking for the book that was recommended for dads now
OP,
Congratulations! Well done! Enjoy!
Even said that we likely wouldn’t be using it much as baby will either be strapped to one of us or in the backpack
Ah yes. The ideal pre kid view. You'll find you use the pram more than you think.
Teapot also talks lots of sense about getting the newborn used to a bottle soon for the mother's sanity. It's the only way you will be any use as provider. If Jnr won't take a bottle.mums stuck with every feed.
I genuinely feel sorry for folks who can’t / don’t want children. Its such a massive buzz that can’t be replaced by endless holidays / nice cars / big houses / other stuff that people without kids rave about.
I feel genuinely sorry for folk who can only find fulfillment thru breeding.
Its a good job we are all different
TJ - don't piss on other people's chips.
As pointed out above by you and others - and on many other threads - everyone is different.
I don't think any of the posts even hint that fulfillment is only achievable through breeding and I doubt anyone will appreciate your dismissive and demeaning comment.
You're better than that.
As a father to three and grandfather to three I love being a parent and grandparent but also fully accept and recognise that many others have a very different attitude.
Think we have around 10 outfits now that probably cost £30 for everything. Madness!
What will they wear on day 2? 🤮💩
A good tumble dryer. You need a good tumble dryer.
trail_rat
Free Member
Even said that we likely wouldn’t be using it much as baby will either be strapped to one of us or in the backpackAh yes. The ideal pre kid view. You’ll find you use the pram more than you think.
Agree with this, carrying them around on the front or back seems such a simple idea, but you have to wait until they can support their heads, so that's about 6 months old, the pram is what will do the job well until then, and of course carry all the supplies!
Frank Conway - why not say the same to the bloke that made the rude and demeaning comment about the childfree? Thats why I posted that. His post was highly offensive but its only commented the other way. I even quoted the rude and demeaning post
Just making a point that is all.
TJ - because this is a thread where people are offering congratulations and advice to the OP becoming a parent. Unlike other threads (politics etc) there really isn’t a lot of need for “balance”. If you have no interest in kids, don’t open a thread about becoming a parent and start nit picking
So its acceptable to insult the childfree who may not be childfree from choice? But to reverse it is not acceptable?
Why not save your ire for the first person to chuck the insults around? Can you not see the double standards here? I get flack for reversing the insult? do you not see how offensive this is?
I genuinely feel sorry for folks who can’t / don’t want children. Its such a massive buzz that can’t be replaced by endless holidays / nice cars / big houses / other stuff that people without kids rave about.
Ok - thats enough - I made my point
His post was highly offensive
Offense is never given, only taken. There are plenty of threads that are in need of an argumentative git TJ, but this isn't one.
Congrats OP. The biggest lifesaver we found, about 4 months in, is that when all else fails the noise of a hairdryer will at least stop the darling thing crying long enough for you to get a 20 minute power snooze.
but you have to wait until they can support their heads,
You don't really you just need the right carrier.
But mum's pelvic floor will dictate what she can do when your not around. Don't push it you'll do long term damage.
Ours is nearly 3 and the out and about nipper still gets used for long walks where she gets tired. we got when the buggy/pram thing we got when she was born stopped being useful at about 18 months. The usual suspect maclaren folding buggy was a non starter....
why not say the same to the bloke that made the rude and demeaning comment about the childfree?
Are you in the same thread?
edit - deleted
A hairdryer? 🤣 my hair is not that long, however the Missus’ hair takes about 2 hours to dry…. So that could be a good option 🤣
Interesting about the pram wording, definitely sounds like you’re all right and we will be using it a while in that case. You can tell it’s the first one!
Tbh I don’t mind if there are opposing views at all and I have friends who don’t have any kids and it’s totally upto them and Im strong enough in my mind to know I’m happy with what we’re doing and everyone’s has their own views…
I think what I will say was wow I think we both underestimated the whole pregnancy thing and doesn’t feel like there’s alot out there with true experiences especially about the 1st trimester.
Happy to share our experience but everyone’s will be different. For nigh on 16 weeks she felt sick all the time, and I mean ALL the time, it then got to actually being sick when she felt really sick, for 2 weeks.
Was funny as she kept saying although I feel sick at least I’m not being sick, and was getting a bit smug… then started being sick!
Just wanted to help her but there was nothing I could do.
It also meant we had to be very aware where we were going, so if we were going shopping keeping something to be sick in nearby. Or knowing where toilets were at all times, She’s NHS so joked that the sick bowls they have look like upturned party hats so had to always make sure we had a party hat!
Just one of those things and I know some people we know have been stunned how ill she has felt as they never had that, but yes I’d say she definitely has been very strong for those 16 odd weeks.
Anyway we’re just past 20 weeks now and everything’s all good, makes me laugh as she was a tea OBSESSIVE and no longer likes tea at the moment and doesn’t like cake and part of the fun of bikerides is the halfway cake stop! 🤣
Plus side is for a while I was eating half her tea’s! Not going to complain at that!!
You don’t really you just need the right carrier.
Yup, loads of different options out there for tinys, from stretchy wraps to papooses and load of others in between
Still be wanting a pram though
FWIW, all the wee buggers are wired differently. Ours were hair dryer incompatible. Ewan the Dream Sheep OTOH . . .
TJ - life and death are at opposite ends of the same spectrum of life experience.
You have been - and still are - at one end of that spectrum; everyone who has posted about your loss has been supportive and no-one has been in any way negative or critical.
For the benefit of those about to join that spectrum of life experience at the other end - new parents specifically - I would strongly suggest to all onlookers/outsiders that, unless you have something positive or helpful to say - say nothing
My daughter is about to start a course of IVF; any suggestions about what I should say to help/support her?
In addition, of course, to all the dad support I've already given - and will continue to provide.
As a general view - ready, fire, aim doesn't work.
Best of luck.
Fwiw the happiest families I see are where both parents went a little part time - so both of them know what work is like and both of them know what looking after the kid(s) is like. Dunno whether that's a cause (keeps you both in similar worlds so communication is easier) or a symptom (the arrangement is a natural consequence of having similar goals and working as a team).
Congratulations! Not much to add to the above, except to remember that some who offer advice based on their own experience are doing so based on a sample size of 1 or 2, so don't worry about finding what works for you, even if it's different.
Congratulations! The best way I’ve heard it described is like being smashed in the face with a sledgehammer, but in a good way.
My eldest is taking her A Levels at the moment
You will be making that statement in what will seem like about 2 weeks.
It’s great though because she makes me playlists and we go to gigs and the footy together now.
Savour every moment of it. It’s an adventure! It’s absolutely ****ing brilliant! 😃
Frank - does that give people the right to insult the childfree? Can you not see how offensive that post I quoted was?
I was happy to drop it - why do you keep it up?
All I wanted to do was point out how offensive that post was
If it matters… which it probably doesn’t, we didn’t buy a pram for either of our boys. They wanted to be held all the time and were happy to be in a sling on either of us. Neither would have tolerated not being able to see what was going on.
TJ other than using the word “rave” I’m not seeing the controversy in that post. It’s been pointed out to him that people are different. Move on and stop making this thread about you
A good tumble dryer. You need a good tumble dryer.
Two kids here, both used cloth nappies, no tumble dryer.
Anyway, I'm currently cycling the Devon c2c with my 10 year old and we're both having a brilliant time.
Well we’re at 30 weeks now, pleased to say the sickness has died right down and made her laugh when I said to her probably around 22 weeks that she’s got a personality again 🤣
She noticed it too but was clearly feeling pretty rubbish, just wondered I think a few people have mentioned good books for men in regards to pregnancy and labour, can anyone direct what are the good ones? Do any read like a comedy? I’d be down for that 🤣
Anyway we’ve been watching hypnobirthing videos online, reading lots of guides and just been tailing back the riding. She did Metabief Green DH run at 28 weeks which was perfect as she’s got a huge MTB streak running through her and is very competent on a bike but would never do anything other than a gentle flow trail to keep safe riding. As she says she’s got as much chance tripping down/up stairs as she has of having an issue on the bike, less so as she’s going steady and has great bike control just reinforcing her being safe on a bike 👍
Glad it’s going well for you. Exciting times!
I think I was just told which chapters of certain books to read… but I can’t remember anything about it now.
Glad all is going well!
We listened to and still do, the parenting hell podcast with Widecombe and Beckett. Very good!
Man versus Baby was a good read by Matt Coyne.
Congratulations OP. I've got 4 including twins. We used stretchy wraps, woven wraps, Tula carriers and a variety of prams. Stretchy wraps from birth are brilliant, keeps the baby calm and gives you free hands to do stuff. With one baby it's easier than manoeuvring a pram through a crowded shop, getting it out of the car etc.
For books, I only read bits of the baby sleep plan by Annabelle Scott Wright and it worked pretty well for all of them.
Congratualtions.
What you need to do now is buy yourself 10 presents of bike parts - pedals, headset, stem etc. Then wrap individually and hide in the loft.
On each write Do Not Open till 2022, 2023,2024 etc etc. Because soon as your new child is born, that will be the end of your bike buying. So this way each year you can open one of them and you'll get something for yourself.
You could use identical packaging, then mix them all up before labeling them so each year its a surprise.
Haha well I’ve gone for “the new dads survival guide” , oh yes the stretchy wraps look great and as it’s been mentioned would rather wear baby than push about I think.
I’m sure we’ll find our own rhythm though, ha let’s see if I can break the mould regarding never being able to buy bike Parts again 🤣 , but we’ll see as I’m under no illusion. Bought a spin bike the other day so we can both get on the pedals at short notice if we want in the garage 👍
The commando dad books are decent. Take you though pregnancy and the early days, some useful guides.
Nice one and congratulations to you both!
Just this thread explains one of the big issues when you tell someone your having kids. Everyone has an opinion on what is right and wrong.
My 2penneth
1. again Everyone has an opinion on what is right and wrong.
2. Look after yourselves. Its an emotional and physical roller coaster strap yourself in.
3. try not to get upset when the midwives tell you your doing it wrong. Your probably not. see point 1
4. get some food in before the birth that you can cook easily.
5. people will buy you stuff and then think they have an opinion on how how to raise your kid. see point 1
6. things are expensive.
7. buy stuff second hand. after the first 6 months (see point 6)
8. you wont need toys initially.
good luck. Youll smash it. look after your mrs 🙂
Get a bag ready to take to hospital, I know it's early and let's hope you don't need it for 10 weeks but it's better to be prepared and not need it than the other way round.
Listen to the Parenting He'll podcast with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdecombe. It's really funny and occasionally has a useful tip.
My kids are 21 and 13 now, enjoy the ride!
Because soon as your new child is born, that will be the end of your bike buying.
May I humbly disagree. I reckon you’ll be buying bikes for three not two. Or four in our case.
And when everyone rides road, cross/gravel and MTB you’ll be buying bikes like there’s no tomorrow.
Enjoy
Well just an update, Reuben was born on 05/10 , Mum’s labour I think has given me a bit of PTSD! I never ever want to see her in that much pain again, anyone echo that?
Funny as we were in the induction ward, they induced her with the balloon but then after that they were too busy to break her waters! 2 days in hosp later after we saw a few ladies casually leave to give labour…. Bring on Charlottes. Contractions quickly ramped up from 10 mins to 4 then 3 mins and she screamed the ward down….it’s true love when you’ve had to be with her in toilet and she’s screaming to you I don’t know if it’s a poo or a baby but in agony.
Moved into the labour ward with no hesitance, 40 mins in there with her wriggling like a caught salmon, issues with baby getting distressed and quickly moved to theatre where she had epidural and episiotomy which hoping doesn’t affect her cycling too much in future.
They don’t tell you about the pain after these operations making it hard to sit down and not nice to see her going through it.
Yay!!!!! Congratulations!
Also, yes 8 months ago we welcomed our daughter into the world - it was no walk in the park.
Like you, we'd done the Hypnobirthing thing - and it was nothing like that.
Without going into too much detail - waters broke, but didn't go into labour, ended up being induced at 7am Friday and daughter didn't arrive until late Saturday afternoon. During that time, I'm ashamed to admit that I was regretting it all - watching the woman you love go through what appears to be horrific torture and worrying if she's going to make it. The three of us then spent a week in hospital. Never again could I expect my wife to go through that again. Wife absolutely has PTSD and it seeing a councillor which has helped.
Fast forward a few months and we couldn't be happier and the trauma is (more or less) a distant memory. Although my wife does joke that if she was ever to meet the Hypnobirthing woman in the street, she'd be getting decked!
I hope the 3 of you are all recovering well - now go enjoy being a family:)
(PS - Baby Growbags/sleeping bags, Perfect Prep Machine, Alexa controlled light in nursery, Milton sterilizing wipes for dummies)
(PPS - Don't even try to get a routine going i the first few weeks, it'll just stress you, fly by the seat of your pants for a while and you'll gradually find your routine - but once you have found it, stick with it!)
Congratulations, enjoy the crazy rollercoaster that is parenting 👍
Congratulations!
Agree that seeing childbirth and watching a partner in pain is horrid - let alone being the one in pain...Virtual hugs to you on that front. Healing will happen.
Congratulations, great news! Mine are now 20 and 16 - birth feels so long ago, but also yesterday! Enjoy the whole damn rollercoaster, it's great!
Congratulations! You're truly screwed now! My eldests birth cost me my favourite pair of sambas but I wouldn't swap him for anything. Except perhaps a new set of sambas.
To add to the list of bike progression. I’ve found the following is a useful bit of kit
>>> follow me tandem
Lovely to hear the news, hope you all recover and settle quickly.
It's a crazy and amazing roller coaster from here on in.
(Avoided the traumatic childbirth due to a C-section. When MrsMC was a week overdue they discovered that her limp - resulting from her cerebral palsy, resulting from a botched delivery when she was born - meant that her hips and pelvis were twisted and there was no way she could have tried to give birth naturally. For which I am forever grateful, though i did live in fear of the second one coming early, knowing the risk)
Awwww, congratulations to you both. From experience, an episiotomy doesn't affect cycling but by god, give it time! The swelling will go down but for a while it will feel like the world has dropped out of her bits (which in a way it has). If she's on diclofenac make sure she takes them with food as they are rotten on the stomach.
Kip Jr is now 12 and I still find myself surprised I am responsible for another human being, I don't think that ever goes away.
Oh, and the Singletrack mag spine quote when Kip Jr was born was something like "It's time to soft-pedal for a bit now." Probably the most apt quote ever and one that got all of us through at times. Go easy on yourselves, you're learning a whole new job.
Congratulations. My experience of childbirth is that the destination is worth it but the journey is brutal.
Kids are the hardest, most infuriating, confusingly brilliant things. You can go from wanting to throttle them to loving them in the blink of an eye (and vice versa).
Congratulations. Now brace yourself for the ride!
Top tip- grab every opportunity for a nap that you can- you're going to need it.