[Closed] getting someone else to teach your kids where you're the expert.....

I always use 'teachers' for teaching. I was a semi-pro golfer, however my lad didn't really pay attention to what I was asking/saying, a tutor who wasn't me, got a lot more out of him than I could.

Same with swimming... he's a much better swimmer thanks to proper lessons.

8)

your own kids get to a point where they seem to percive that even if you are indeed an expert at something, a 'teacher' is the person they'll listen to rather than you.

That would be pretty intimidating I think!

I've been taught by plenty of excellent teachers who aren't actually all that world class at the skill they are teaching, but are great at the teaching part.

Likewise, I've been taught some things by some very talented people who can't seem to master the "teaching" part!

(most notably, I was taught to climb on ice by someone who has put up new routes in the Alps/Himalayas, but when asked on a grade IV/V "i'm struggling a bit here, what's the best way to move on ice this steep??", he replied "Just sort of, hmmm, erm just sort of try to make good placements and move well" Thanks! 🙂

Expert at an activity and expert at teaching it aren't the same thing, and indeed often seem to be mutually exclusive. Those to whom things come naturally often struggle to describe how to do something as they don't consciously understand how they do it themselves, they just do it.

Goes without saying that there's not necessarily a direct correlation in one's ability to do an activity and one's ability to teach it. Otherwise all teachers/coaches would be more skilled than the students...

If it's any consolation I'd not heard of Bernard Butler, so I'd be none the wiser if I was his pupil!

Also stands to reason that teaching someone you know/are related to will always be harder, irrespective of your skill level - you'll always be their son/daughter/father/brother/dog walker rather than their teacher!

Expert at an activity and expert at teaching it aren't the same thing, and indeed often seem to be mutually exclusive. Those to whom things come naturally often struggle to describe how to do something as they don't consciously understand how they do it themselves, they just do it.

and are more quickly frustrated by those who don't have the same natural ability.

Heard the same thing about some big names in a lot of sports, people pay for the name but there are much better coaches out there in a lot of cases (some good exceptions though)

It's also a nightmare trying to teach those close to you. It's worse with a partner.

[i]...I'd not heard of Bernard Butler, so I'd be none the wiser if I was his pupil[/i]

He can play a bit.

However, I think you've misread the quote? Butler isn't a guitar teacher, his son is someone's guitar pupil, is how I read it.

As others have said, playing is one thing, teaching is another.

I've a mate who is a very good guitar player but an exceptional teacher. So much so that many well known people come to him for certain things.

Add into that that you can't teach your own kids because to them you're Dad (or Mum) not a teacher therefore can't be right.

Kids never listen to their parents teachings!

Also as has been said it's one thing being able to do something, and another being able to explain to someone else how to do it. Just check out the "how do I wheelie" threads on here 🙂

Now lets have some Suede...

mini-aracer has swimming lessons with the dad of somebody in his class. His swimming teacher's son has swimming lessons with somebody else. Which makes it clear that not teaching your own kids is a significant factor even if you are a very good teacher (as he is).

I agree with the above. An excellent teacher is someone who can make the subject accessible, fun and doable. An expert in the field is just someone who is very good at that subject. Expert =/= good teacher.

I had good experience of this - a very expensive private high school in London employed pretty much only professors and doctors to teach, and the students learned bugger all. As a personal tutor that was an interesting experience!

"Stranger at the bus stop"

I can tell the missus 100 times that sailing/cycling/whatever is good fun and we should do it together, and she'll say no.

Someone at her work* will casualy mention they've done something similar and all of a sudden it's a good idea**.

* or the metaphorical stranger at the bus stop

** for about 30 seconds, untill she realises she's just agreed with me, the inner turmoil lasts a few minutes and then we're back to normal.

Teaching family and friends/partners can work though.

At different times I taught my Mum, Dad and older Brother to ski when I lived in Austria (mum is not in least bit adventurous, had never played any sport before, can't ride a bike or swim !)

They are all excellent skiers now (brother better than me now, but still gets coaching from me)

It can work, and I didn't find it any harder teaching them than anyone else really, although to be fair, I did treat them like any other client and made no allowances or changes to the lessons etc.

My kids will often tell my wife and I that we're wrong because their teacher said something different. We're both teachers.