German Bashing....H...
 

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[Closed] German Bashing....Help me win ze war.

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i'm having to eudure some friendly banter from some of the lads (via WhatsApp) from work off the back of this recent Lufthansa advert:

i've retaliated with the Berlitz/German Coastguard and Mitchell & Webb/Skull Caps. I've told them that it is no wonder they lost the war if they feel that 16°C requires a jacket.

Give me some ammo.....


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:33 am
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THis is the killer phrase, uttered in every Commando comic between 1950 and 1986.....

"For you, Tommy...ze war is over"


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:35 am
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[i]Schweinhünde[/i] should do it


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:36 am
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@ jimmy

i've been here for eight years... i'm well past Schweinehünde.... my vocabulary is varied enough already. 🙂


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:40 am
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Give me some ammo

Not sure I've got anything that can compete with the kid tbh. Sorry.


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:46 am
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You could congratulate them on making a funny advertisement but have to ask whether they hired a British company to esnure it was funny

Ask them where Slovakia is as you though it was a tiny and impoverished country of 2m people in Eastern Europe, you didn't know they even had a football team till last week


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:47 am
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You could just endure the banter until England get pumped out of the competition early doors and Germany win it?

Seems a safe course of action.


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:48 am
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You could just endure the banter until England [s]get pumped out of the competition early doors and[/s] beat Germany on penalties and win it?


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:52 am
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@ Perchy - Who's in Scotlands group this time? 😛


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:55 am
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Who's in Scotlands group this time?
Holland, Denmark and Greece


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:57 am
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Ask them if they still watch 'Dinner for One' every Christmas.


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 8:59 am
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Ask them if they've returned their bicycles to Holland yet.


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 9:01 am
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i couldn't give zwei toots for Fußball.... and they know it.

regardless, i have to listen to jokes asking if it is only those who can't drive get given a yellow number plate; that i can't be English as i don't like football, have all my own teeth and supposedly know who my mother is; whether BGT is truely representative of the UK.... (friend asked what i was doing "watching the DH WC. where are the Germans or do they all ride like pussies like you?" his response: "I'm watching BGT. Are all Brits as ugly, toneless and as fat as you!"... made me laugh)... the list is kinda long

i'm thinking more Jurgen the German "I would like to apologise for the conduct of my country..."


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 9:03 am
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Tallpaul... yes. they. do.

every. single. year.

and yet it is still really, really funny.... somehow.


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 9:04 am
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A German calling a Brit fat is a bit ambitious ... once heard an epic rant from a Dutch fellow, "the only thing fatter and uglier than a German is a German car"


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 9:11 am
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You could always cover the saddle of his bike in fake semen?

A popular jape amongst our Teutonic brethren, as I recall.

[url= http://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/sperm-recipes/page/2 ]http://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/sperm-recipes/page/2[/url]


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 9:16 am
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Well played nickjb.


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 10:14 am
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Ask them to say squirrel.


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 10:16 am
 ctk
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Are all Brits as ugly, toneless and as fat as you!"...

"Do you think Hitler should have killed fat people as well as the disabled and the Jews?"


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 10:23 am
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"Is it true that there is no word for 'fluffy' in German?"


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 10:24 am
 br
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[i]i have to listen to jokes asking if it is only those who can't drive get given a yellow number plate; [/i]

that's more a 'pop' at the Dutch though, or at least it seemed like that when we lived in the north


 
Posted : 10/06/2016 10:25 am

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