Generally unpleasan...
 

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[Closed] Generally unpleasant atmosphere at home

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Just unloading really....

16 year old in the middle of GCSEs, just split with his gf, also stressing a bit with all the other events he's got coming up over the summer, music exams, Scout Jamboree, DofE expedition,

Wife stressed out of her head working in children's services, and running a Guide unit.

12 year old daughter living in her room when she's not training at gymnastics or practicing her instruments

Me, working a part time job I hate trying to keep this three ring circus running and having to constantly cancel my own plans to help someone else with theirs.

It's all getting a bit snappy and nasty with each other. Easier not to talk to each other to stop your head being bitten off. Just hoping that it will calm down a bit once the eldest has finished his exams.

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 8:55 pm
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Pub.

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 8:57 pm
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Managed a long road ride with a mate today - therapy for both of us!

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 9:03 pm
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Riding sounds like the best option.

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 9:35 pm
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Bike ride needed. For all.

We've finished Highers and Advanced Highers last week, the difference in atmosphere is noticeable. That an one got a new bike.

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 9:54 pm
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Family life is tough sometimes, hey, not "war or refugee tough" I agree, but they are you're first and foremost important thing in the world.
All the hard work is worth it though just for days like the wrightys have had today all wandering around Snowdon.
Keep at it more cash, I'm sure deep down you know it will all come together again some time soon. 👍

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 10:00 pm
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#humblebragfirstworldproblemcrisscross

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 10:06 pm
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GCSE’s are a difficult time - they mean sweet FA as an adult, but when you’re in the midst...

12 year old daughters can be unfathomable and difficult. They turn back into humans at around 23.

The trials and tribulations of family life and work can be difficult for the grown ups.

1) make time for your wife/partner to keep the flame alive - date night at home, dinner out, whatever. Talk.

2) for a while, just chill and respect that the members of your family will have divergent needs. Talk.

3) When exams are over, book some time off and spend some time together, maybe somewhere else, maybe on holiday, maybe camping, maybe a dedicated screen free staycation. Just make time to spend time together. Talk, laugh.

4) bike rides and pub. You can’t look after anyone else’s moral wellbeing if you are not looking after your own. Ride. Drink.

Good luck.

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 10:13 pm
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Cheers all. Felt better just writing it down.

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 10:19 pm
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You're not alone.

Children, eh?

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 10:22 pm
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Swap the part time job you hate for a full time job you like? Keeps you away from the unpleasant atmosphere longer each day.

Help the 12 year old with her activities, let the other two manage and take care of their own. Your wellbeing isn't any less important than theirs, so make sure you take time out for your own activities. If you are less miserable then maybe that will rub off on the rest.

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 10:39 pm
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Go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for it all to blow over. 👍

 
Posted : 28/05/2019 10:46 pm
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Same situation with our son ....I took him out for a bike ride last week and just told him to relax do the best he can and whatever happens after that happens ..it seemed to calm him down a bit ...

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 7:51 am
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Kids are arseholes.

It's unfortunate that society frowns upon tasering some sense into them every once in a while.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 8:09 am
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Yep,

We go through bouts of that sort of stuff, families eh?

Riding is the answer, a couple of hours of decompression and not only that, sometimes one sane voice in a sea of nuts can calm things down.

Turn your phone off too!

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 8:48 am
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Coming from the other side (as a son, as opposed to a family man): Let your wife & kids know you're there if they need a chat/rant/help but don't insist on getting involved or helping.

Aside from that I'll echo the above comments - riding and going to the pub.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 12:02 pm
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I know how you feel.  Two 12 year olds and a 14 year old - all communicating in morse coded door slams.  Wife working in an underfunded public sector role - working all hours.  Self just returned to work after surgery and probably returned a little too early...

But the plus side is - we all still love each other and a few hours with friends is a massive stress reliever!

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 12:21 pm
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I have twins in the middle of GCSEs at the moment. God help me.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 1:00 pm
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Congratulations on recreating the unpleasant atmosphere in here, Pebblebeach. 😉

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 1:24 pm
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No worries, I always like to make people feel at home no matter where they are in the world.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 1:27 pm
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Sometimes it can be very very hard being extremely middle class, I understand the pressure you must be under.

Must be exhausting to be that bitter.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 1:46 pm
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I hear you. We managed to have three kids 2 years apart so had one doing GCSEs and one doing A levels together twice. Second time our eldest was also trying to get himself thrown out of uni. Antidepressants helped a bit. Bike rides and dog walks helped too. It passed eventually and we're now on the last one doing A levels. Managing on rides and dog walks this time, but not optimistic about the exams.

Keep going matey.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 1:51 pm
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Must be exhausting to be that bitter.

Indeed.

It sounds like the smart arse whining typical of teenagers that think they know everything 🙄

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 1:56 pm
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Must be exhausting to be that bitter.

au contraire dear chap, I exude joie de vivre, hence why I don't get dragged down by mediocrity.

It sounds like the smart arse whining typical of teenagers that think they know everything

Ah resorting to name calling, top work old boy.

we’re now on the last one doing A levels. Managing on rides and dog walks this time,

jesus wept, get a grip.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 2:02 pm
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au contraire dear chap, I exude joie de vivre, hence why I don’t get dragged down by mediocrity.

I’m a woman, and you really don’t.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 2:05 pm
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ah that's great, thanks for letting me know. I'm pleased for you that you feel you can share that.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 2:11 pm
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I have twins in the middle of GCSEs at the moment. God help me.

I had the same last year, plus one doing A levels! I feel your pain..... they just come miserable [in their rooms].

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 2:13 pm
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Tell people how you feel

Remember this is temporary

Try and find a little me time

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 2:17 pm
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There really is a small outbreak of petty unpleasantness on here in the last couple of days.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 2:58 pm
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Wow - thanks for all the support and understanding. I was just unloading and venting, and it is a first world kids class problem.

Had I been successful with the interview for a new full time role that I failed to get through last week, then we might have been able to rejig family roles and priorities to find a better balance, but let's not let that get in the way of some spiteful one upmanship eh, you ****ing trolling ****

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 3:04 pm
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Well, if you ever want to  buy a taser, I know a guy....

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 3:06 pm
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EDIT : deleted as lacks context now that a post has been deleted

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 3:19 pm
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It may cheer you up to hear that one of my esteemed colleagues has just ejected pebblebeach from the forum permanently, along with his regular account, assisted along the way by telling us to **** off after receiving a warning.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 3:59 pm
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along with his regular account,

Do tell?*

* I know you won't , but I had to scratch the itch by asking.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:02 pm
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Don't tempt me. (-:

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:11 pm
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Sorry that he provoked me. Not my finest hour

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:15 pm
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I've had a trawl* through  his post history and  he's clearly from my neck of the woods and has a cheeky turn of phrase.

I was worried for a bit that he might be one of mine 😉

*see what i did there?

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:20 pm
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along with his regular account
You cannot say that then just leave us hanging!!! 😡

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:25 pm
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That escalated quickly, Cougar it's probably best you don't us who it was (just tell me).

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:46 pm
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Oh, but I can, that's far more amusing.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:50 pm
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he’s clearly from my neck of the woods

Scottish and argumentative? That's so implausible it's basically a DNA match.

MacCruiskeen.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:57 pm
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Oooh! are we guessing now?

That might work......

wanmankylung?

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 4:59 pm
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It may cheer you up to hear that one of my esteemed colleagues has just ejected pebblebeach from the forum permanently, along with his regular account, assisted along the way by telling us to **** off after receiving a warning.

The modz are far too efficient these days. I'm sure you used to have to post several pages of personal abuse to attract their attention. Now you just have to mention pop-ups or take the piss out of us middle-class flowers and you're oot!

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 5:05 pm
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McMoonter

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 5:05 pm
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Don't be ridiculous. He's gentry :).

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 5:06 pm
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Piemonster.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 5:10 pm
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I hope it isn't me. Better send an f off email to Cougar just in case. 😉

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 5:10 pm
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If we're ejecting people from the forum, I *also* voted LibDem.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 6:31 pm
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it was only a cat.

 
Posted : 29/05/2019 6:36 pm
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It may cheer you up to hear that one of my esteemed colleagues has just ejected pebblebeach from the forum permanently, along with his regular account, assisted along the way by telling us to **** off after receiving a warning.

Couldn’t have happened to a nicer person.
Regular account, eh... it’ll be interesting to see which regular poster suddenly becomes one of The disappeared.

 
Posted : 30/05/2019 11:18 pm
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Joe Cocker hasn’t posted lately.

 
Posted : 31/05/2019 12:00 am
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Joe Cocker hasn’t posted lately.

Hasn’t he been ill?

 
Posted : 01/06/2019 5:43 pm
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Mik Smith? Anyone seen the expert of absolutely every subject recently?.....

 
Posted : 01/06/2019 7:09 pm

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