Friends and the lac...
 

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[Closed] Friends and the lack of. Depression, suicide and a friendly offer of a brew.

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Very much the same position myself, but in the Lakes. Just coming to terms with the whole thing at the moment, which is hopefully the first step in dealing with it.

If you are ever up this way give me a shout though!


 
Posted : 23/10/2017 10:52 pm
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Fantastic thread and well done all for opening up. Surely this thread deserves a sticky to ensure it's always at the top. You may not realise it jmatlock but I think you just created the most important thread on this site.


 
Posted : 23/10/2017 11:22 pm
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A sticky would be awesome. Just b nice to have a place where people can vent and listen to others and maybe ride some bikes together.


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 5:30 am
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Wahey! I've had somebody take me up on my offer! Just need to firm up a date and gauge what numbers might be best before posting more detail on here.


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 12:19 pm
 scud
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JMatlock - only just seen this thread, i am an only in North West Norfolk, between Swaffham and Dereham, so are always happy to rides bikes with any one and shoot the breeze, can cover riding from road bike through to mountain bikes and fat bikes, so let me know if you ever fancy coming over this way or hooking up in Cambridgeshire? I am also not the smallest of racing snakes either so can appreciate putting weight on when you take a step back from riding for a while!

pauljwhitlock at gmail.com


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 12:36 pm
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Paul, I will drop you an email. I have a few to reply too. The response to the thread is amazing.

BigJohn. Nice one for offering and I hope the ride goes well.

Who do I need to ask to see if maybe we can make this a sticky


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 12:56 pm
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https://www.theswanseabay.co.uk/2016/06/29/bike-ride-month-tywi-track/
Looks like a good ride Ambrose.. I just won't wear waterproof boots.. be like having puddles on my feet all day.


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 2:10 pm
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Has anyone got any good recommendations of books or podcasts that have helped them during bad times?


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 5:11 pm
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I found a book on CBT helpful


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 5:41 pm
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Well done for starting this I am going through the same not sure what is wrong it’s just some days I have just had enough,I am not far away near Peterborough so could maybe meet up sometime but I am not very chatty I find it hard meeting new people,if your on Facebook there is a group called Peterborough mountain bike riders they do a night ride every Thursday night at 7 2/3 groups go out and they start/finish at a pub.


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 6:18 pm
 tdog
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Yeesh! Ops post is describing how too I am feeling especially as having moved to Devon recently so don’t know anyone to ride out with yet. I do put a good front on even though I’ve had a rollercoaster of a life and wouldn’t have been here typing this now unless it were for bikes and some sort of assistance.

We all have a story to share and be good to offload and go create some tyre tread indentations through the winter as to train to get fitter for next year’s finer weather/trails.

If anyone’s in the Plymouth area and wants to check out trails round my way, enjoy good Co. and good cuppa after a dirty sess outdoors 😛

Drop a message to my inbox if you’re in Devon, be real good to create a regular group.

😀


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 7:02 pm
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Love seeing people sticking their hat in the ring and talking a bit. I was taught at a young age to don’t cry and to stop being soft. So it’s hard to be honest about how you feel some days.


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 8:34 pm
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Maybe I'm getting cynical, but this thread would be great for any bike thieves wanting to lure some unsuspecting mountain biker to somewhere remote before relieving them of their pride and joy. #buzzkill


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 9:52 pm
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A) you're being cynical.
B) if anybody has the right, you do. :o)


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 10:00 pm
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jmatlock - Member 

Has anyone got any good recommendations of books or podcasts that have helped them during bad times?

Just found these , not looked at them myself yet though.

https://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/Pages/moodzone-mental-wellbeing-audio-guides.aspx


 
Posted : 24/10/2017 10:10 pm
 tdog
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Maybe I'm getting cynical, but this thread would be great for any bike thieves wanting to lure some unsuspecting mountain biker to somewhere remote before relieving them of their pride and joy. #buzzkill

I’m guessing you’ve forgotten that when riding, we as a biking community tend to stick together.
Bitd, was good times to be had meeting randoms and becoming riding buds, now it drifts in and out of the biking community on/off line.

#GETWITHTHETIMES

😛


 
Posted : 25/10/2017 5:14 am
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I wouldn't want people to worry about meet ups being an excuse to rob someone of their bike. I think the chances are slim to none to be fair.


 
Posted : 25/10/2017 9:47 am
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Good work people in talking about this so openly, so many of us are affected and for every one of us who contributes to the thread there must be many more heartened to read of others' experience/bringing a dark subject into the light. Jmatlock, it's a bit dated now (just like me really) but I found the Spike Milligan/Dr Anthony Claire book a useful general guide (sorry, can't remember the title)


 
Posted : 25/10/2017 12:13 pm
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[url= https://moodgym.com.au ]Moodgym[/url] helped me somewhat. It’s online CBT that you complete at your own pace.


 
Posted : 25/10/2017 12:21 pm
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Back to the top because mental health is important.always happy to meet for a beer/bike ride anywhere in the north.


 
Posted : 08/11/2017 7:44 pm
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Thumbs up for this thread.

Great work chaps!


 
Posted : 08/11/2017 8:00 pm
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It really needs to be a sticky.


 
Posted : 08/11/2017 8:02 pm
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PM'd tdog


 
Posted : 09/11/2017 9:42 am
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JMatlock - I’m Just outside of Newmarket having moved back this neck of the woods following my wife’s rather nasty cancer scare- her illness, being pretty much primary carer for my 6 year old and relocation mean that I’m a proper grumpy barsteward desperate for some group motivation to get out and ride before I stray too far down the path of couchlandria and middle aged spread.
Give us a bell for a razz round Thetford forest or road ride etc- will punt you some deets shortly - Sunday looks cold... therefore Thetford should be .... fast?


 
Posted : 09/11/2017 9:37 pm
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Awesome to see this thread still going. Things have got a bit worse for me over the last couple weeks. Really struggling. But I did get out for a few miles on my new bike at the weekend.


 
Posted : 09/11/2017 10:01 pm
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New bike?!!! Things have got to be looking up!


 
Posted : 09/11/2017 10:05 pm
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I sold my entire collection one weekend when I was feeling particularly down.

I sold a Cotic BFe, An Escapade, 2 SE Bikes Big Ripper 29’’ BMXs and a Cannondale CAAD10

I now have one nice Gravel Bike to cover all my riding until I feel slim enough and for enough to warrant an Aero road bike


 
Posted : 09/11/2017 10:16 pm
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Yeah aero makes a lot of sense round the fens 🙂
TBH I’ve come very close to selling my bikes at times - even a puncture nearly pushed me over the edge!


 
Posted : 09/11/2017 10:21 pm
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I walked into my garage one day and just got the jump with it. Just felt so overwhelmed by this massive pile of material possessions like bikes and Lego and video games and other junk I sold the lot.

Now there is one bike; and my drawing desk in there. That’s it.


 
Posted : 09/11/2017 10:54 pm
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I tend to go the other way, when I'm at a particular low I BUY new kit for whatever hobby! At least you're still riding though, I find it helps me massively. All the best.


 
Posted : 10/11/2017 7:07 am
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While it would do me good to meet up my social anxiety and low self esteem mean I rarely do, especially with strangers. Outside of work I think I socialised once in the last month, that's fairly typical. Being so isolated really isn't healthy.


 
Posted : 10/11/2017 7:28 am
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Birky, why don't you "accidentally bump into" an organized group out for a ride and say hello?
Tag along chatting to them for as long as is comfortable then take it from there.
Agreed with the isolated bit.


 
Posted : 10/11/2017 7:49 am
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You see that’s the joy of cycling - quite easy to work with a group and have absolutely no social interaction whatsoever and people won’t really think that abnormal. Least not on the road 🙂


 
Posted : 10/11/2017 8:13 am
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So, I signed up for the Wiggle Spring sadde. Little 75mile sportive. A couple of years back I would have breezed it. I did the 2016 Dragon Ride and finished. So I though a goal might be a good reason to get some weight off and miles in my legs.


 
Posted : 10/11/2017 9:01 am
 scud
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As per my message up above, i'm only in North West Norfolk and can have a few good road/ bridleway routes near me if you fancy a ride and a pun lunch?

Also singed up for all of the Norfolk Sportive company events, they do some good 50 mile ones over winter for £5 and for the Ride It CX 53 miler at Thetford on 26/11/2017 if you're about, grou of us doing it to find a few more routes in the area.


 
Posted : 10/11/2017 11:39 am
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Thetford on Saturday peeps? Dry +cold= quick? Well quickish


 
Posted : 14/11/2017 8:44 pm
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My work schedule has eased off nicely so I've got a bit more free time and flexibility for rides around Cannock Chase and Stafford. MTB or road - all good if somebody wants to come along.

I've started to do some riding at Derby Velodrome too, but that's not really a casual turn up and ride venue. But it's very good fun.

I've also introduced somebody to windsurfing a couple of weeks back, but it's starting to get a bit chilly for learners.

Address in profile, etc. etc.


 
Posted : 25/11/2017 12:41 pm
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this thread is amazing. Sad that so many people are suffering (myself included) but it's so good for people to open up, and then realise that they're not alone, they're not unusual, and they're not freaks.

I find riding (often alone) very theraputic and really like the idea of some organised bicycle therapy.

Good luck to the OP and all the others struggling to keep it together xx


 
Posted : 25/11/2017 12:53 pm
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