[Closed] For parents that went from 2 to 3...

Mine were 9 and 3 when the third one arrived. It was fine. To be honest, the third one is the nicest and most affectionate.

Is it like when tennis players have three tennis balls thrown to them and get to throw the one they don't like the look of back?

You need to either ask Saxonrider as he has around 1000 children
Or
Higgo as he had 3 arrive at the same time.

I have 3 now aged 17,15 and 13.
With pretty much a 2 year gap between each, it was pretty tough when they were little but now they are older I love having 3 .
There are some practical considerations to consider not least we needed to get a people carrier when they were little , parents were less keen on Baby sitting and keeping tabs on 3 when you go to the park with them and there’s just you could be interesting!
I only lost the youngest the once.......
As they get older though , I found they have tended to look out for each other more and offer support to each other.
I’m one of 3 myself and I quite like being part of a bigger family.

Our's were 6 and 5 when the youngest arrived!
It was just like we had got through all the hard stuff with the older 2 starting school, then it was back to square one.
Don't expect any help or sympathy from the older 2. life goes on for them.
Any combo of 2 out of the 3 was alright but all 3 together could be a nightmare sometimes
As they have gotten older they generally look out for each other and it's quite touching when one of them returns from a trip and they just sit together and chat or play Mario Kart!
They are now 22,21 and 15 and wouldn't change any of it!

I have 3 boys aged 11, 10 and 6.  There was always going to be 3 when number 2 came out blue. Number 3 was supposed to be a girl but that didn't go to plan 🙂

We have ups and downs, but mostly it's no harder with 3 than with 2 IMO, but that will depend on the kids as much as anything I guess.  My eldest is the most trying, the other 2 are pretty easy really

Our third arrived just before the eldest was 4. I think one of the biggest things is how the other 2 are, if they are easy to look after or if they are a bit of a handful. You'll also need to check out cars thatll fit 3 kids seats properly across the back seat and that quite possibly means a bus! ours are now 8,10,12 & 14 and they are good fun apart from the youngest sometimes has moments.

I've 3, aged 4, 2 and 2 months. A similar experience to your own I imagine. 2-3 is much easier than 1-2. You can't get any more busy, so in our house stuff gets cleaned less. Sleep not so good at the moment either.

You'll need a new car though....

My eldest is the most trying, the other 2 are pretty easy really

Yeah, even at 32,30 & 26 this is still the case, but easy enough really even as a singleton from when the youngest was 1yr old. Expensive though as most clothes etc only lasted the first two.

We had three boys under 4 years old for a few weeks... Now 19, 17 and 15.

You deal with it. You learn not to run after every step they take - and learn to teach them independence from an early age. You will learn how to be efficient getting out the house, shopping, everything. There's lots of hand me down clothes and bikes to be had.

As they get older they are close enough to actually get on (ish, they're brothers though...).

As soon as no.3 is here, go get booked in for the snip... 😉

I have a daughter who is 30 a boy who is 25 and 2nd daughter who is 24.

Our second daughter was a total accident after a romantic evening and alcohol we didn’t make it to the bedroom and “protection”. We were in a panic, could we afford this, do we want this (I had never intended to have 3). We did briefly consider our options and went for it.

Now for me 3 was exponentially harder than 2. We had to get a new car to fit kiddy seats in and ultimately a new house so they could all have their own rooms. Was a tough time when they were young and both my wife and I were earning a lot less.

Would I do it any differently if I had my time again - of course not! My youngest is fantastic and like her siblings works for our fabulous NHS.

Mine were 7 and 5 when no3 arrived.
As above third is the cutest 😉
No2 did much looking after her little sister.
Competition for parent attention arrived as we were now outnumbered.
It was tough at first but you get through it.
No 1 and 2 are now teenagers pls God let this end soon!
No 3 is still cute and lovely 😂

3 boys here,13,11, and 7.
Came as quite a shock when the missus said she was expecting, then I remembered the bottle of champagne that had been delivered to our Honeymoon suite!🤣
Anyhow No1, your going to need a bigger car, currently have a Mondeo which has been great for the last few years but had meant other family members have had to step in for my non driving Dad, or a second trip back to fetch him for pub lunches for example, currently looking at 7 seater replacement.
The other one is bedrooms, lived in a 3 bed anyway but sold and brought another with the view to extend and add a bedroom.
I've got to be realistic and say this isn't going to happen,so eldest gets his own room, and bunk beds it is for the very forseable future for the other two.
Holidays can be a bit of a pain as generally rooms are based on 4 maximum occupancy, always managed a workaround, but it generally involves a bit of jiggery-pokery regards beds or my eldest shares with my sisters family who we generally go with.
Also if their anything like mine be prepared to be eaten out of house and home!😂....would I change it? Would I heck.

You'll take no photos of the third one 😉

Ours are 12, 10 (just) and 6 (about to turn 7).  Wouldn't change it for the world.  I was happy at two but knew the wife wanted a third.  Luckily my kids shot up quickly so car seats were only an issue very briefly but luckily they all squeezed into o the back of a mondeo.

Like the posters above, oldest one is the hardest work with the younger two being way more chilled. Littlest is the happy go lucky one as well, unless hungry or tired!

Perpetual chaos, but never a dull moment. I've got three mates to play 4player bomberman, what else could I need 🙂

Edit: holidays sometimes we cheat and take a camp bed with us 😉

Three here, 10, 7 and 5 BBG. It's awesome. Any 2 out of 3 is good; all 3 awful. Need eyes in the back of your head. Bigger car generally. Busy house! Toys everywhere...

I used to work with a guy who had 5. He said to stop on an even number and I'm tempted to agree. They pair off and 3 is an awkward number. So, sorry op but you need to cross fingers for twins or just keep going.

Had to laugh about twisted pencils comment about photos.
My youngest always asks “Why are there so many photos of my brother and sister but not me?”
She also tended not to get her nappy changed until it was almost down to her knees ......
All of this probably shaped her and she’s ended up probably the toughest and feistiest . She’s the youngest but also the one most likely to get her own way!
When they were younger we also noticed how when there were 2 it was easy but 3 resulted in more conflicts!

We went from 1 straight to 3, #1 was just 2 at the time.

It's great, 3 kids is a good number as there's nearly always someone to talk to.
The only negatives are you need a bit more space and lots more ££££ over time.

We went from 1 to 3 in one go. Oldest was 18 months when the twins were born.
Still remember both of us in hysterical laughter when the radiographer said “they’re both doing fine”. First we knew it was double bubble!
The best advice we were given was never say no to an offer of help when you have 3 kids. Also learn to run fast if you’re outdoors a lot as the little buggers will head off in three separate directions
Mine are now 27 and 25. Two MEngs and a BPsyc(I think). One now doing his PhD. Must of got it not completely wrong. Good luck. Enjoy it.

Mistake pffft...

Got a 26 year old, a 15 year old and a 14 year old.
Mate, no difference between 2 and 3 in my experience. Cant for the life of me think why youre not 100% on a third child yet, it is, with luck, on its way now. By far the biggest change in life is going from 0 to 1 child, not 2 to 3.
This isnt a dig, we all have different lives, but if youre thinking about the change it will make to your life, forget about it, that change was made the second you had number 1.
The only advise I would give is look out for the middle child. As neither the first born or the baby, they can get overlooked by relatives easily. As a middle child myself I can confirm first hand that this can occur.
Congratulations though!

One recent issue is the rule of 6, that's knackered seeing grandparents, when back in tier 2...

Although we can invite divorcee mates round to see how much more relaxed their lives are...

We've got 3 boys, 8, 6 & 4. It doesn't make much difference really, but there's nearly no photos of the 3rd knocking about the house but loads of the first 🤣🤣

Its just more food, toys, clothes as the poor little sod can't live in hand-me-downs, oh yeah that bike you bought based on good resale will be bolloxed by the time the 3rd one has been on it.

Oh yeah, we added up how much 3 rounds of maternity leave has cost us, ye gods, I could've had a fleet of expensive carbon bikes by now 🤫🤫🤫

We were once given the advice ‘never go into a supermarket with more kids than hands’, which in hindsight was the only sensible advice we were ever given. Two to three isn’t the same shock as going from one to two but if they are all young and are competing in the strop olympics it can be really hard work.

9 years on from the youngest, we wouldn’t change a thing but still haven’t worked out how to pay for them now or in the future, or if we’ll ever retire. Space is very precious and sooner or later the older two are going to have to learn either tolerance and negotiating skills or practical repair/building skills.

27 in jan 25 yesterday and 19 bedrooms and cars biggest problems,oldest had box room 2 other’s shared oldest now got 2 girls lives with partner youngest lives with bf middle still hanging on in with the oldies got snipped just before 3 popped out I had Money and dark hair wouldn’t change much really (hard to choose a favourite with 3😉) enjoy it while they’re little it soon goes!!

12, 9 and 8 BBG here. There's a quote we read after the birth of our girl, I'm paraphrasing but it's something like:

When your first child eats dirt, your reaction is slight panic and maybe a trip to the doctors.

When the second eats dirt, your reaction is "it'll be fine".

When the third eats dirt, your reaction is "hmm, I wonder if I need to give them any dinner now?"

Pretty much summed it up for me.

Love that quote, I've 3 - 11 yrs/2 yrs/7 weeks

It's hard work but bloomin ace, they are all so amazing and different, middle one is mental funny, big one is dependable/kind/funny, youngest just adorable
Bring a dad is the best but hardest job ever 😀

"we have just found out we are expecting."

It's definitely just one??

We have twin daughters of 18 and a son of 15. It was hard coping with the girls when my wife was in the early stages of pregnancy with our son (morning sickness, lack of sleep and toddlers do not make a happy mix), but we got through it. The first few years of their lives seems like a bit of a blur. Going from 2-3 was a lot easier than going from 0-2. I used to think that we learned from our mistakes with the girls and did a better job with my son, but as he has got older, he is probably the one that causes us the most worry. All said and done, I have no regrets whatsoever and wouldn’t be without them. As others have said, you’ll probably need a people carrier. We had to get one when the three little ones and their paraphernalia wouldn’t fit into a Mondeo estate anymore.

Good luck!

OP if you're anything like Mrs S family 4 is the magic number for achieving a daughter. I look forward to your next thread in December 2022! Congratulations.

🙂

Just for perspective, a former colleague and his wife tried for number 3.

And had triplets.

I remember the look on his face the day he found out and came into the office in a state of shock.

Yeah, mate of mine went for number 3 and they had twins.  But he's a laid back chap so no problem.  Think it would have been too much for me 🙂

To be honest, the third one is the nicest

Brutal stuff.

The answer to your next question is Ford Smax

I have three and it it was much harder going 2-3 than it was going 1-2. You’ll be fine though, you don’t have much choice!

We went from 2 to 4!
Had 2 boys age 6&4 & all was good, then we had a surprise
We werent sure either, my wife was pretty happy when we thought it was just 1 extra, I took a while to come round
I was too lazy to go to the scan so I learnt it was twins over the phone, I'll never forget that day! My mate in work caught me just staring out the window.

If I'm honest it took me a while to get my head round it all & twins are hard work

But the twins are 4 now & they are ace

I have three and it it was much harder going 2-3 than it was going 1-2

Very much this. A mate referred to it as like treading water, someone then passes you a baby. So you keep treading and stay afloat. Then 2nd baby arrives, but that's just more of the same, you take the 2nd one and your legs are kicking like crazy but the technique is there.

Then some ****er passes you a third baby...

When your first child eats dirt, your reaction is slight panic and maybe a trip to the doctors.

When the second eats dirt, your reaction is “it’ll be fine”.

We’re just waiting for the second to arrive, but given how we feel about the pregnancy this quote already resonates with me!

First things first- congratulations!!
Mine are...sons of 34 & 31, daughter of 28; 3 grandchildren and counting.
Biggest change to your life is with the first; after that it's all (relatively) straightforward - other than the
never-ending cost.
With the first everything is new and novel; much less so with second; when it comes to the third...you've reached expert status.
Sibling rivalry - and massive protectiveness - is quite something to experience.
Neither you nor your partner will have any free time but the fun and enjoyment more than compensates; you're about to find out how elastic time really is - and how to improvise like an expert!
Riklegge's comment up there about eating dirt is dead right.
Could say so much more but...won't.
Love your children; cherish them; make memories.
You will get a million times more in return.

Richie_B
Full Member
We were once given the advice ‘never go into a supermarket with more kids than hands’

yep, and as any centrehalf will confirm, it means you need to stop man-for-man marking and go zonal......which never works well

"I have three and it it was much harder going 2-3 than it was going 1-2"

This. And just as we were coming out of the new baby phase with no. 3 (she was born in Nov 2019) the pandemic hit and it got so so so much harder. (If you haven't had the horrors of baby-rearing whilst home schooling and trying to save your own business, with the restrictions stopping any friends or family from being able to help, then I can't recommend it at all...) She's going through a sleep regression right now, so tonight I'll probably be in a dark room for a few hours whilst she screams, if last night is a reliable indicator.

However, she's becoming a lovely little character (HUGE personality) and the bigger two are delightful with her. I think we take more photos and a lot more video now. Our elder daughter was heading towards 7 and our son was 4 and a bit when no. 3 arrived. Today we ventured out with her on a bike seat for the first time, and playing chase (on bikes) around our nearby derelict grit hockey pitch, which was fun!

Fairly recent to the 'zonal marking' world here (not my he quote, someone here said it to me about a year ago, it made me smile). 2 daughters 5yo now at school, 3yo at nursery part time and starts school next year (August baby), and a 6 mo boy. As above really... No time to do any jobs or anything for ourselves... Very tired... At times it feels like exponential growth on tiredness.... But then that's a 6mo for you. Odd time with covid, probably made life far far easier for us! Sort of dread normality and commuting plus school runs! Although a year from now with 2 at school and a toddler I suspect it'll be easier.... But won't seem it.
Making do currently with an Octavia and a i10. Yes we can all get in the i10 for a short journey (wife or me squeezed in the middle of the back seat). Octavia is better and managed assume liner journeys but I'd it hasn't been for covid and doing little driving I'd probably have changed to be a 7 seater already. If tier 4 comes to an end and I can make time I need to get to assume dealers and see how car seats etc fit!

Wife and I were very glad the girls had each other as playmates in this weirdness, and although it's hard now we hope the third is close enough to play well with them in another be 2-3 years... Maybe. I'm not a big fan of small babies but little one is getting his character more now and I'm looking forward to the future. If only the 3yo would sleep better right now hahahaha. With 3 a good night's sleep is rare at the moment.

Main three problems
1 - house size
2 - car (SUV, people carrier or van)
3 - food

Everything is in packs of 4 or 2. Basically I buy more and eat more to use it up!

Life is more chaotic, but more fun. My older two help out with the youngest as there's quite a big age gap.

Based on observations of friends with 3 kids. You can no longer man mark them so you don’t really notice the extra carnage.

A friend said going from 2 to 3 was way more difficult than she expected. Can't remember if they're on 4 or 5 now.

Bsims, I find you drop your standards all over 🤣

As soon as you have a third child, the entire world turns against you for exceeding societal norms.

Want to book a room in a hotel? Maximum two adults and two children (Hiltons are one of the few exceptions to this)

Family ticket for theme parks, cinemas etc? 2 adults, 2 children.

Buying a car? SMax

Buying food? Daddy gets two. Everything comes in packs of 4 or 6.

The leap from none to one is huge, the leap from one to two is tiny. 2 to 3 is the hardest. Apparently it ceases to matter after 4

@neilnevill - we found our standards dropped considerable with number 2.

Overall I think there is a variation between 1-2, 2-3 and 3-4 being the worst depending on your systems and techniques.

To summarise one more than you have would either be a complete disaster or not noticeable depending on what level of hair loss you are currently at.

The car isn't the problem you think. Three child seats will go in a standard car if you push hard enough (& don't worry about your kids sitting at a slight angle). It also means there isn't room for them to swing decent punches at each other which is an added plus. I did have a small MPV a couple of years ago but you get marked out as the designated bus service by other parents so I reverted to a cheaper option as soon as I could (it was the only car I've ever had which didn't require serious spacial awareness to get the bikes in so there were benefits)

One plus (that I tell myself) of 3 is that when you take them out you are fully engaged in it. You often see folk with 1 or 2 looking bored and staring at their phone. That is a problem you will never have.

You will be in a constant state of cat like readiness, able to change a shitty nappy while restraining the 2nd and giving the 3rd a snack.