[Closed] Finding out about someone discretely

Drug & torture 👿

Why do you care? If she wants to live a lie, let her.

That said, what are the whoppers?

Given that *YOU* hoonose clearly want to stay anonymous, maybe you should respect your work colleague's privacy also.

Gently probe her 😯

We care in case she starts telling lies to her superiors about us and vice versa. Also we don't like being taken for mugs. She is our boss and it undermines our trust in her.
I don't really want to detail the whoppers, but we have serious doubts about every aspect of her home life.

"Why do you care?" +1....

Unless you have aspirations on becoming a tabloid journalist?

is she fit?

She is our boss and it undermines our trust in her.

Well given that you want to metaphorically rummage through her knicker drawer, the trust has already gone hasn't it.

+1 what business is it of yours? Frankly you and your friends are the odd ones. Leave her to her privacy

#curtaintwitcher

Do you have evidence (even suspicion) of her lying at/about work? If not then you have little to worry about.

Her home life couldn't be less of your business. How would you feel if she was checking up on every story you told about what happened at the weekend/in the pub/on your holidays?

💡 Live under her floor boards for a week (don't forget your poobags) 😉

whoppers about her [b] private[/b] life

There's a clue in there somewhere.

Take a look at article 8 of the HRA.

Edit: Actually I do know a guy.

[img] [/img]

I want to stay anonymous so this doesn't come back on me. So as to avoid anymore dodgy suggestions a la qwrerty,I'll concede one thing, it's actually a bloke not a woman, it was getting tricky to remember to put she/her each time rather than he/him anyway.

One possible lie is he claims to have gone to a very famous public school, but other things he's said like " that famous person was two years above me" don't add up when a quick google confirms said celeb went to a different school.

This is one of the smaller potential fictions.

It would be fine if he kept his private life private, but he wants to tell us about the amazing things in his life which we don't believe. Its been going on for years.

So you're using a second log in to ask how to spy on your boss?

Would it be ok if we all tried to find out who you really are?
Even if we did it discretely?

🙂

she has now turned into a he?

edit: just saw above.

Live and let live unless it's affecting work. Life's too short.

This is one of the weirdest threads I've seen in a long time, and that is saying something.

If you have no trust in him/her/it/whatever in a work sense, then you're going to have to start logging everything and getting everything in writing. This will obviously sour the relationship, but if they are lying then it will at least let them know that you know, if you see what I mean.

Other than this, it really is nothing to do with you.

Yes, Chipps really did go to Sandhurst 😉

Yes, Chipps really did go to Sandhurst

and was 2 years below Optimus Prime.

I'll donate a tenner to the chosen charity of whoever confirms the original id of the op.

I can see the 'none of my business' point of view,but how would you feel if you felt you were being fed more and more BS by your boss, when you work in the same small office space, day after day?

Jesus, that will take two minutes, rusty spanner.

Coincidence that Robert De Niro should appear in this thread cos I went to school with him.

I'd find it both funny and sad, and still none of my business.

If you managed to find the truth behind your suspicions and it transpired that the person was lying, how would you handle it? Would you and your colleagues join in a pisstake ner ner type scenario or will you scratch beneath the surface to try and discover why someone would want to lie in the first instance…?

DezB, was he above or below you?

2 questions:

1. If you do get some more info from your hired source, what are you going to do with it? Get him sacked? Not sure where that leaves you
2. If you're found out even considering doing this I suspect you'll find yourself sacked pretty damn fast and then will have to explain it to future employers.

There's twice when I've had dishonest bosses (lying at work, not about personal matters) which was affecting my ability to be effective at work and both times I simply kept a diary of their contradictions and lies, ready to show HR if for any reason they tried to implicate me. I would suggest this is your best and most legal strategy...

Re your post about getting fed up with it, OP, both the people I refer to above had very very fast staff turnover ie: people just left. That's your best strategy IMO...

If (s)he is a teller of tall tales regarding her home life, it's their own business. If the lies are impacting work however, covering up absences for instance, that's a HR issue.

I think some people are just wired that way. I've known a couple of lads over the years who were serial bullshitters, pure and simple.

Good question teasel, the potential lies are too big to laugh off! We already have him down as a sociopath.

We already have him down as a sociopath.

You mean psychopath. Read Robert Hare, Without Conscience to understand psychopaths and then write your resignation letter - there's nothing you can do about them except get away from them... there's a reason why they end up in the news and in jail - they ruin the lives of everyone around them and there's not a lot you can do about it IME

Well put cougar.

It's the potential lack of two weeks authorised absence that he is now due which has sent our paranoia in to overdrive!

Edit: how's the dehumidifier doing by the way?

So why not use your 1st log on then? 🙂

Just make up some tall stories of your own. Like when he makes some claim about being at school with someone famous, say how that's strange because they were in your class.

Finding out anything factual about him through work is a breach of data protection and I dont see any other way except hacking into Facebook, etc. I do find it a bit strange that you want to find out about him. You are always going to get bullsh*tters in every job or someone who exagerates a bit but the only issue I can see is if he is making lies up about you and your colleagues that could result in blocking your career or worse.

RS I refer you to Brooess' point no.2.

The thing is brooess, apart from this issue I really like this job! Great colleagues and customers, etc.

I think it's time I shut up now.

If he said his dad was the first one in at the Iranian embassy , he's lying that was my dad.
He once had a trial for United, Can't help .
He did all of girls allowed starting with the ginger one , maybe, I would .

What does it matter,
I worked with a Walter Mitty type and it was a great source of amusement. Also anything you bought he could have always got it cheaper.

I worked with a Walter Mitty type and it was a great source of amusement. Also anything you bought he could have always got it cheaper.

Ah, the old 'Elevenerife', so named because if you had been to Tenerife...

Billy two sheds, 😀

Arthur, surely?
[img] [/img]

Ken Mackenzie?

[img] [/img]

Ah yes, the 'elevenerife'.

We've got a woman at work who just loves to pipe up. Most of the one-sided conversations start with "No, the best one was............."

According to her, her husband ran the London marathon in a time that wouldn't shame a top Kenyan runner. All by basically giving up the booze for a month beforehand and little else.

My standard thought nowadays is just "give the husband a ****ing medal, because if I had to put up with that, I'd be running a marathon just for a few hours peace".

It just provides amusement now, really.

Did he tell you his parents died in a fire at a Sea Parks?
[url= http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qy_BKKnHgas ]http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qy_BKKnHgas[/url]

Edit: how's the dehumidifier doing by the way?

Still going strong, thank you. I thought you were being incognito? (-:

I think some people are just wired that way. I've known a couple of lads over the years who were serial bullshitters, pure and simple.

Hell yeah.
I used to work with a lad like that, and literally in the first week I knew him I laughed in his face and told him he was bullshitting. He backtracked a bit and got embarrassed.
Thing was, he was a cool guy with a lot going for him, I liked him. But the bullshitting never stopped. He didn't need to do it though, he was better than the BS, and that's the sad part.

[img] [/img]

According to her, her husband ran the London marathon in a time that wouldn't shame a top Kenyan runner. All by basically giving up the booze for a month beforehand and little else.

[url= http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/get-inspired/27994073 ]Steve Way?[/url]

Ask him what colour is the boathouse at <insert public school here>.

That'll get 'em!

So your boss is a gobshite - welcome to the big bad world.

huckleberry it's got close to that level at times!

On a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT TOPIC, just out of curiosity and hypothetically speaking... Imagine your (supposed) wife gave birth to your first child two weeks ago today and you returned to work as a teacher (hypothetically that is) today after the summer break, not taking paternity leave, how tired do you think you would look? Very or not at all? If you were awake at 4 am this morning would you have gone for a run?? Would you then be heading off to the gym after work? Would you be telling everyone around you how great your baby is and showing them pics on your phone or would you give only the briefest details when directly asked about the baby? When pressed further would you show a colleague one blurry photo of the baby on its own or several? I'm just wondering like.

Stalking your boss, what a knob.

The guy is probably telling you all sorts of crap for fun, that's what I would do before I fired you.

I've fathered hundreds of children, all over the world, and I always look fresh and sprightly, as I never bother with any of them

Having said that, I'd never go to the gym after work either

Does that help?

Hmmmm. I'm also beginning to suspect that the object of the OP's suspicion is not the one with the real problems.............

😕

He'd have to fire everyone then

We had a baby two weeks ago; I'm an AHT and went back to school today, and I've been getting no sleep either.

Are you one of my admin team? If so, where's all my sodding SIMS data I requested? Lazy bugger...

You have 3 options:

1) leave your job if you hate it so much

2) Suck it up, and get on with your job

3) Man up and confront him/her.

choices, choices, choices 😉

I'm just wondering like.

You sound very weird.

No bullheart, I don't work with you! Have you got the energy or time to willingly partake of exercise at the moment?

SSUK on Saturday. Driving up from Kent, riding, then going home.

I am one of lifes idiots though; not a bullshitter...

Is he called Matt? Sounds awesome.

Although when my BIL and wife had a baby she did absolutely everything. He was getting 10hrs s night sleep. Every night.

SSUK on Saturday. Driving up from Kent, riding, then going home.

I am one of lifes idiots though; not a bullshitter...

That's not going to be good enough for the OP, you know. He's probably sifting through your posting history right now.

I don't need to sift, I know bullheart's new heart is doing him proud. Good effort!

All he'll find are a variety of old-school gumble subscriptions...

I'll stalk her for £500, or kill her for £1000

used to work with a guy who really fancied himself as a boxer.. no one saw or heard independently that he could but every day all we got was.. i trained with him went two rounds with him.. until one day some one turned round and said.. tell us that one about the spaceman again.. he never told another tall story..

it was all fluff and harmless didnt impact on his or our work but it was just annoying in the end..

I can understand the desire to know establish if it's BS or not but IME the best plan is to find it amusing and try to trump them and see them raise their story to the scale of utterly preposterous. Seriously, it's quite enjoyably challenging and you remain above it all (outwardly anyway).

I used to play cricket with a bloke who was in the army. He was forever giving it large about all sorts of stuff. He arrived at one game kitted out head to toe with brand spanking new Gray Nicholls gear. He went on about how he'd got it all free with sponsorship for playing for the army. The only problem was he hadn't realised that one of the opposition that day was the shop owner who he'd bought it all from two days before.

He had a bit of a tough time from the rest of the team for a few weeks after that 🙂

OP, what's your budget?

I honestly don't know why this is bothering you OP... Also the whole investigation is really creepy if nothing else. He will be caught out if he is lying in the end.

In one way he sounds like a sad lonely fantasist - but have you considered he may really be a deep cover agent for the Mossad ? I would get MI5 on the alert immediately. Is there a black van parked outside your office all the time ?

On the other hand - faking a baby to get free time off work - hats off to the gentleman. I would try it, but I'm a girl so may have to produce a live baby at some point. Binners, can I borrow one of yours for a day ? I will return it clean and ironed.

...although not entirely sure if 'Colin Hunt' is the stalker or 'stalkee' in this case

There was a guy at work years ago who used to say things about being in the army, but would then say that he couldn't talk about it when asked questions.

Everyone gave him stick for it, and he had various nicknames for bullshitting etc etc.

He left for another job, and six months later we were sat in the van at lunchtime, and we saw a picture of him outside court in the paper. Full details of how he was a sniper in Bosnia, the awards and stuff he'd got while serving etc etc.

We'd all presumed he was full of shit, but as it was he was playing it down all that time!

And the mind boggling thing was, he was in court for beating the shit out of his dad (who'd left when he was fairly young, but stayed in touch) when he found out that his dad had lied to him all his life, and he was actually a long distance wagon driver, and not in the Army as he'd always told him.

I've not thought about that for probably 15 years, and even writing it down it sounds ridiculous.

True story though.

All stories on the internetz is true !

We had one at work. Would lie about EVERYTHING. Even stupid stuff like how much petrol he put in the car.

Thing was, he was good looking, sporty, had a great kid and he'd married an absolute honey with a loaded Father. It made no sense. It's penniless half wits like me that should be making stuff up.

OP should def look into his boss, why not, good to have a project.

I'm thinking that the OP could be hora? Didn't he do a thread a year or so back trying to find a woman from Huddersfield or somewhere?!

The boss definitely sounds like Surfmatt.

Thing was, he was good looking, sporty, had a great kid and he'd married an absolute honey with a loaded Father. It made no sense

[img] [/img]

🙂

I am most definitely not hora.
I am not a big hitter in any way.
And I'm not actually a stalker either. Yet 😉

hoonose - Member
I can see the 'none of my business' point of view,but how would you feel if you felt you were being fed more and more BS by your boss, when you work in the same small office space, day after day?

Tell me his name and I'll find out everything you want to know.

Sorry, but I call wind up and he has plenty of bites over three pages of posts.