[Closed] Don't often post for support...(no happiness in this thread, don't open)

F******ck - sending love to all, wish I could do more. 🙁

I am so sorry.
[url= https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you ]The Samaritans [/url]
They won’t be able to tell you why but they will be able to tell you how to meet other people suffering the same pain, They are there for all victims of suicide.

It's terrible. We have some friends whose son committed suicide about 18months ago - at age 15.

We *have* to speak about this more, and support our children in this, realising the pressures, challenges and difficulties they face, some of which we create as family and friends.

Hugs OP.

Similar here. Teenage girl we knew decided she had had enough earlier this year. Sympathies with you, it hit me very hard. The world is a very confusing place and often makes no sense with everything seeming to be mixed up. Add in peer pressure, exams, relationships and the rest and it's amazing that anyone is equiped to cope

I know how you feel. It's horrible, so sad and just leaves you empty with no comfort.

So dreadful. Take care sbob.

Horrible news sbob. We also found out a family friend did the same on Friday night....he was a doctor no less. 🙁

Yep, that's shit. Talk when you're ready, but don't let feelings get bottle up too long. Ride your bike. Good luck from a stranger. Take care.

A neighbour took his own life around the same age - on our close knit cul-de-sac where we all grew up. It took all the life and spirit out of that family for years - the father’s only son, the light of his mother’s eyes, the little bro of all the sisters left behind. They never talked about it and his mum went into some kind of (understandable) denial mode for years. So make sure you’re there to listen if your mate needs to offload. Try and encourage him to do so. They may never get over this - just find a way to live with it.

So tragic to hear this, a very close friend of mine, his son (21) died 3 years ago, stupid idiotic mistake that cost him his life. No words can make sense of it.

So sorry for you Sbob and the lads family.

Just got back from the beach to be told a windsurfing friend of mine died from a heart attack whilst on holiday . Fit as fiddle 50ish guy into running and windsurfing. RIP Colin.
Hope your mate can get all the help and support he needs. Lifes tough enough as it is without having to deal with massive upsets like this.
19 is too young .
If he had just asked for help ...

😥

Sometimes it's difficult to find the words . . . to ask for help or give support. That's what hugs are for . . . take care xx

Sadly this happening to often amongst the young lads, usually young lads, they bottle things up, cant see a way out of their bubble, just every so often ask someone near to you are you ok, have a chat, say hello.

Sixteen year old son of the in-laws neighbour hung himself earlier this year. Such a sweet kid. Horrible thing to happen. Love to you and yours OP and anybody else that needs it

A good friend of mine killed himself nearly 15 years ago. It was so unexpected that it really hit me for six. I couldn't imagine anyone less likely to take his life. He was recently married, was seemingly happy in his work and life in general. We'd been out for a few beers a couple of nights before he took his life. He seemed as happy as I'd ever known him. He left no note and to this day we have no idea why he did it.

Ithe seems such a waste, and I count my blessings that the troubles I've had in life have never been such that death seemed to be the best option.

RIP Roger. I miss you still.

Without wanting to join in a "me too", an old friend of mine hanged himself a couple of months ago. I hadn't seen him for a few years as his self destructive urges had gotten to the point where I got fed up babysitting him.
I'd heard he'd gotten himself straight recently, so I thought I'll probably give him a call and see how he is, but life gets in the way and before you know it, it's too late.
The problem with suicide, as you're well aware Sbob, is that it only leaves What-Ifs. I'm sure I ran through the whole range of negative emotions in the months after finding out, starting with anger, then guilt, and just plain sadness.
There are other charities who are trying to deal with this, but for the life of me, I can't remember what they're called, which probably says something in itself.
Like all grief, it WILL ease up. For now, you have to gather round the family as much as they'll allow and keep talking.

Tough times @sbob, like you and so many who have posted here I have friends and colleagues who have experienced this. Don’t underestimate the impact on yourself and do what you can for your mate. Those teenage years are difficult, I’d certainly never go back. Such a tragedy for someone so young with so much ahead of them to experience can’t see a way forward.

Cheers guys, just struggling to know what I can do to help my mate.
What can you do?
I'm making sure he knows I'm available.

I think that's all you can do. I don't know if it's a English thing or a people thing to get embarrassed around grief. People can sometimes shy away from those who need the support exactly when they need it.
The funeral may help, but maybe not. It just takes time.

Horrible news, his poor parents.

I had a friend who committed suicide in his early 20s. He was funny and clever, he'd just got funding for his PhD, and it was a complete and utter shock. I remember his parents trying to make sense of it. It breaks my heart even more now that I'm a parent myself.

I think that all you can do is be there for them.

I think the effects of a suicide are far more wide-reaching than anyone suspects.

I still think about a boy in the year above me (he was in the Upper 6th). I barely knew his name but I can honestly say it affects me to this day.

As you say, a release is important. Don't underestimate the benefit of relatively anonymous places like STW.

All the best.

I don't know if it's a English thing or a people thing to get embarrassed around grief.

When I went back to work (and apologies for the sweeping generalisations), the white English folk expressed sympathy but didn't seem comfortable talking about it, black and asian people seemed far more willing and able to talk about. That was fine either way with me - didn't particularly want to discuss it (tick for the white folk) but it was actually quite useful to talk about what happened (tick for the black and asian folk).