[Closed] Dating - what's your story ...

I dated women quite a lot, they're all nutters.

samuri - Member

I dated women quite a lot, they're all nutters.

😆 How did they punish you?

Were you kidnapped for ransom ?

it's been a little while now (many years) but what worked for me was to stop looking.
The reek of desperation is about as off putting as anything. Listening to some absolute horror stories from friends would be enough to put me off.
Get on with your life and see what comes along. Get out be sociable, do things you enjoy and expand your social circle. A fairly good way to meet people who like the sort of things you do.

Bloody hell that's a lot of effort put in to find date sitting in front of pooter.

My gf had to find contributors for a documentary about internet dating. To be able to contact people on dating sites you need to have a profile that matches their interests, so to contact straight men you need a straight female profile and so on. So she had to create multiple profiles - ages, genders, orientations in order to be able to see and contact peoples profiles, and had to do this across multiple sites. I think to get a dozen or so contributors there were something like 3000 initial contacts made. Theres a scene towards the end of Homeland where Clare Dane's character melts down and here house is covered in notes about the case. Thats what our spare room looked like - hundreds of URLS, logins and passwords, on post-it notes all over the walls and she was contacting so many people the sites would lock her out for hours or days at a time. The site admins must have thought she was a massive bunny boiler

So her experience of the online dating sphere? In summary "Its a murky pond" 🙂

a guy at my work met a girl on some dating website or other, theyve been going out for about a year now, and tbh they both seem really happy with each other.
the guy i work with is a decent bloke, ive been drinking with him a few times and the girl he has met seems really nice, although i have only spoken to her very briefly.
although, im sure for every nice story there are probably several hundred horror stories.

ernie_lynch - Member

Were you kidnapped for ransom ?

No, but then in GeordieLand anything can happen as they are plenty of women with biceps bigger than mine.

mikewsmith - Member

Get on with your life and see what comes along. Get out be sociable, do things you enjoy and expand your social circle.

Hhhmmm ... where to start? Ask your co-workers? Social circle (with female is a massive failure) at the moment is non-existence with just blokes.

maccruiskeen,

Yes, that bit about creating profiles ... 😯

Looks like she is trying to profile some criminals. 😆

That's good Youtbue clip ...

martymac,

That is wonderful ... you sure they have no split personalities ...

Hhhmmm ... where to start? Ask your co-workers? Social circle (with female is a massive failure) at the moment is non-existence with just blokes.

1 night stands with all your co workers should at least make christmas parties more fun 🙂 That was more where expanding social circles comes in. Join something, go somewhere do something. Try a climbing wall, just to be 1 woman to every 200 blokes, now seems the other way round.

No, but then in GeordieLand anything can happen as they are plenty of women with biceps bigger than mine.

Being from those parts, a colleague who I worked with recounted a tale from a visit north for work. He asked about good nights to go out and was told Norses night was good (one particular night of the week)? Eventually when they got out they found it was Nurses Night (after payday) and everything was a lot better.

My question was aimed at samuri and all the "nutters" he's dated chewkw.

Although I was interested to hear that plenty of women in your hometown have bigger biceps than you. So I understand your concerns. Take it easy fella.

I had a brief foray into the world of internet dating..... it was a total and utter waste of time and (emotional) energy.

After talking to some female friends that have also tried it, they told me that as a half-decent looking woman you get completely bombarded with messages from wierdos (hello!) thus rendering the whole system unusable.

I gave up and was convinced to try speed-dating. I had resisted doing this for ages. Best thing I ever did! Met my current GF, we've been together for 3 years now, and have just moved to oz.

The good thing about speed dating is that the format is a barrier to people who's social skills are not up-to a 3 minute face to face conversation. Even if they do turn up, it's pretty obvious who they are, and you can just mark a "no" on your card.

Anyway, maybe not for everybody, but the whole speed dating thing was much better for me that internet dating.

My one and only dabble with aol's chat rooms has led me to a wife and 2 kids. The best £11.99 a month I've ever spent.

Sunday Times personals here. Mrs Gti placed an ad, I responded. The crazy thing is that I circled the ad then forgot about it and when I remembered, had to go looking for the paper - I could so easily not have bothered. Thanks to that little tiny impulse we married and made a baby who is now a healthy 14 year-old with a whole life ahead of him. It's shocking and even distressing to think that if I hadn't gone off and found the paper and written that letter, he would never have existed.

I was born ugly and could never get women to be in the same building as me, never mind dating. I did manage to get married to the most inappropriate old boot which was a disastr, and after that broke up tried Internet dating (quite some years ago now). Bloody hell, there are some weirdos on there! One Russian woman took an unhealthy interest in what car I had and wanted to meet in a specific secluded lay by ("so her husband wouldn't find her"), another asked me within 2 emails to "cut the crap, how much cash have you got as I have 3 kids to support". I ran a mile. The one date I did get from a newspaper to a quite stunning lady promptly went back to her ex on meeting me!

I gave up. To my utter surprise and never-ending delight, I met the now mrs o when I didn't expect it and had resolved to give up trying at all.

If you were a single bloke in Derby I would feel very very sorry for you, last time we were out I reckon the ratio was easily 70/30 men/women...

How to find love online ...

eeeeezy...

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Friends & colleagues on the second lap use them, too many nutter stories for me, mostly male nutters.
Colleague runs a singles night in her spare time and that seems a bit better, still get a share of oddballs and weirdos.

My sister met a lovely bloke on an Internet dating site, they've been together 3 years now. Two of my friends, however, keep meeting nutters.
I recommend Mountain Mayhem- that's where I met Mr Pea!

Never got kidnapped but some of them certainly took social awkwardness to a new level. And that's from a grade A geek.

Dabbled a bit on t'internet dating a few years ago. Met someone amazing first go, didn't work out for a few reasons 🙁

Since had another dabble and just seem to meet crazies. Went on a date recently and the girl who I'd been emailing must have been busy as she sent her mother along... Either that or it was a [i]very[/i] old photo on her profile!!

Another girl I met was absolutely stunning in a very understated way, rode horses for a living so was clearly in good shape, but then spent the whole date telling me how thick she was. I sure she wasn't and it kinda felt like she was convincing herself she was. Weird!

I've been on a few mtb dates as well - never my choice, much rather go to the pub for a drink and at least you can get out of there quick if it isn't working out. Despite claiming to be really into mtbing, they inevitably they turn up on a Halfords £99 special which hasn't been out of the shed since last summer. I've now started taking a fairly well stocked toolkit 😆

I get married in December .We met online Two years ago .There are lots of odd folk out there though most of them are on Plenty Of Fish ,which isnt where we met

Thought I'd give internet dating a go after been dubious about it for years, after hearing all the horror stories, etc. The first and only date i went on after only been on the website for a couple if weeks, I met my now Fianceé. Right place at the right time and all that.....

I met a girl on Plenty of Fish a couple of years ago. We got married and are now expecting twin girls.

I dated loads of women whilst I was looking for the right one and it is a numbers game at the end of the day. The more prospects you meet, the better your chances of finding one with whom you are suitably compatible. The internet gives you to access of massive databases of people who are looking to find someone to love. No mixed signals, everybody knows what they want.

I think it will do as much for the gene pool as bicycles did.

. The first and only date i went on after only been on the website for a couple if weeks, I met my now Fianceé. Right place at the right time and all that.....

Almost the same here, was on a website for a couple of weeks chatted to loads of women during that time one women in particular stood out, we went on a date 3.5 months ago and have hardly left each others sides since.

🙂

Internet dating really worked for me although im an outgoing gobshite that stops when it comes to chatting up the opposite sex .Chatting on the internet before we met really made meeting after a couple of weeks a lot easier

I used to know two women who used internet datings sites ... it seemed to be a way of guys getting easy casual sex... by promising anything the ladezee wanted ...
One of them even moved in with a guy she had met, the day after the first date ...
She left him after two weeks - but I guess they had great sex .... and then they had to start talking.

Bloody nightmare - I have recently decided that i'm happy with my steady decline into crazed spinsterhood, but cleverly replacing cats with bikes... 😉

Talking of Channel 4 - did anyone see that "First Dates" thing, where they have set up a restaurant with cameras especially to film the first dates? Christ, if that's the sort of idiots that are out there! I think there was 1 normal couple that were intelligent enough not to talk about stupid things (paedophiles, dead wives, innuendo, blow jobs, poo, etc).

Bloke I used to work with met, moved to the US and married a woman he met online - this was in 1990 on a Bulletin Board!

I met my OH on Fitness Singles 4 years ago, we get married in 7 weeks....

Every girl I've 'dated' was from online. I simply don't have the balls to go up to a girl in real life as start a conversation. With my girlfriend now almost 2 years, met on POF.

I'm currently enjoying this blog

http://28dateslater.blogspot.co.uk/p/new-read-it-from-beginning.html

I'm *so* glad I'm happily married and out of this game

i met my gf through online dating. after a year of being on match.com, and i'd pretty much given up hope of meeting anyone who wasn't insane or totally incompatible (and i'd got to that point without having a single date too), then a week before my membership ended she showed up in my search thingy.
this was 3.5 years ago now.

Met Mrs. Oath 5 years ago on a dating site. Had been out with 1 nutter, 4 other women first. Our paths would never have crossed otherwise. Been married for 2 years and first child on the way in Sept 🙂

missnotax - Member
Bloody nightmare - I have recently decided that i'm happy with my steady decline into crazed spinsterhood, but cleverly replacing cats with bikes...

Fancy dinner sometime? 😆

I met the current MrsMomo through match.com - I also met the previous MrsMomo on there, lovely girl but didn't have time for anything but work. Yes there are a lot of weird people on there (POF is worse than most, 1 girl I went on a date with looked like she had eaten the person in her photos!).

Have also met women in the pub when I wasn't really looking.

dashed - Member

missnotax - Member
Bloody nightmare - I have recently decided that i'm happy with my steady decline into crazed spinsterhood, but cleverly replacing cats with bikes...

Fancy dinner sometime?

No money for dinner - keep spending it all on bikes 😉 😆

The girl I met through online dating (we were together for a year or so) once showed me some of the emails she'd had from other guys.

Oh. My. God.
One guy suggesting she was just the sort of bit on the side he was looking for while he was "working away". Loads of men who made it obvious that all they were after was sex. Some emails that were barely readable due to the appalling spelling and grammar.

And someone who, in his introductory email to her, had said he expected her to dress up in nurses uniform and spank him.

Mind you, some of the women I met on there were just as weird.

I haven't dated anyone since 1990. These stories don't inspire me to start!

I'm not in a position to do online dating sites, but tbh, it appears a numbers game and sadly it seems the people on these sites aren't exactly accurate about themselves, certainly in the case of fitness singles..

Luckily i don't seem to have a problem in meeting lovely ladies and do so, despite my social status of a rambling hobo.

Somehow, ladies like the idea of me living a minimalistic life, dwelling in a cobweb strewn outhouse and doing various jobs from Bee keeping, orchard care, apple pressing, audio and visual and construction. Then there's my love of the outdoors and in wildlife photography. Maybe it makes me interesting to talk to.

It helps i'm relatively fit, not carrying lard and easy on the eye, so i've heard. Plus if they even get my sense of humour as it's a little quick for most, it's a good.

It's just a well then that i'm at first very shy and rarely approach women. But wherever i go, there they seem to be and for some reason, they approach me. It's then i strike with either a repellent or a waft of natural pheromones to lure them to my lair.

I don't wear aftershave or deodorant, i wear no fancy fashionable clothes and am at most of the appearance that i've just walked through a hedge or festering ditch, which i normally have.

What i'm saying here is that i don't go looking for it, i don't make an effort to be anything other than what and who i am and in doing so, i only meet people who are genuinely interested in me, i'm almost always in a place where i like to be, doing the things i like to do and thus, meet likewise people.

And someone who, in his introductory email to her, had said he expected her to dress up in nurses uniform and spank him.

Probably quite an efficient method, send that mail to every girl on the dating site and wait for any replies. Saves buying them all dinner etc only to find out they only dress up in Fireman's uniforms....

No long termers though, eh Sharki? 😉

A very lovely girlfriend of mine who was internet dating years ago got sent a completely umprompted message from some random guy which was in fact a video clip of him *ahem* 'enjoying himself'. She had sneakily opened it in a meeting expecting it to be something nice - she screamed 😯 😆

At has been known, i'm good for a few months then i either pick holes in them or myself and move on for fear of lost sanity.
Usually i let it run it's course and once the novelty of a new and fun friendship wears off, we jump ship before it sinks. Also i'm planning on being on a island in the Caribbean for most of this winter and unless they want to come with me...

From female friends experiences its ALOT OF LEGWORK/almost a fulltime job searching, talking to, sifting etc.

Saying that - I do think with the proliferation of ads now on tv for dating and the possibility of turning a womans head - there will be alot of normal girls who will find themselves falling into the serial/casual sex vicious circle where its all too easy to just have one more date..

Said friends also had ALOT of sex out of their experiences with relatively new and changing partners.

If I was on a dating site and a girl said 'I've been here a while/had a few dates but not found the one' I think I'd walk.

Yes there are genuine (men) and women on them but tbh you'd have to wade or be very lucky to find the genuine non-nutjobs/shaggers/girls who love themselves.

1/4 of all relationships now start online apparently.

The internet dating world does seem to be split between those who found "the one" at their first try, and the lots-of-legwork approach from those who keep meeting nutters!!

In fairness, the nutters have been in the minority for me (but certainly stand out!) and I've met lots of decent people who I just didn't fancy or didn't click with.

The vast number of profiles out there where women don't seem to have any interest or passions is always a constant amazement for me. "Likes spending time with family and socialising" seems to be all that 90% of the female online dating population do in their spare time. What, no bikes?? 😯

missnotax - Member
No money for dinner - keep spending it all on bikes

A gentleman always pays on the first date 😆

Plus, you might be surprised - we're not all keyboard warriors and overweight IT geeks on STW 😀 😀

The vast number of profiles out there where women don't seem to have any interest or passions is always a constant amazement for me. "Likes spending time with family and socialising"

I'm guessing thats why they are single? Their partner got bored and left. Harsh..

dashed - 😆

As a girlie who has (I think!) an interesting hobby in mtbing and does lots of interesting things, I have literally had about 1 email in amongst the hundreds from someone who was remotely interested in the fact. And he lived in Scotland 😐

nutjobs/shaggers/girls who love themselves.

luckily for me that's my type of ideal partner..

nutjobs/shaggers/girls who love themselves.

And the downside is ..?
TBH - my life's experience tells me that nutjobs are simply amazing in bed ...
Dangerous out if it, and unwise to go to sleep in it but worth it 😆

Just keep to the shelf-life ...

I'm guessing thats why they are single? Their partner got bored and left.

Plenty of guys don't really have any hobbies to speak of either though.

Worse for me - from a dating/first impressions point of view - is people who lack any curiosity in the world around them. Chatting to a girl recently I found that in spite of having lived in Newcastle for five years whilst at university and having had ample opportunity to find out a little about what was going on around the place. She was amazed to find out that there was a theatre in town when someone took her on a date there, had never noticed the Sage, had never realised there were beaches within a few metro stops. She hadn't spent her time exploring the local hostelries and watering holes to any great extent which is often the fallback in these circumstances.

I appreciate that none of these are huge things but personally I would find it completely impossible to even get through a date with someone whose whole world exists behind their front door.

My gf had to find contributors for a documentary about internet dating.

Course she did.

If we were paid to research new bikes. I'd have ridden a few..

Just keep to the shelf-life ...

13+ years

Dangerous out if it, and unwise to go to sleep in it but worth it

Just keep to the shelf-life .

Anyway, recent newsworthy stories have included fraud and knife carrying offences.
Still, excellent shagging and it's amazing how you can forget the other stuff.

you just need to be more open minded. nutty people make you look good, and get you free drinks, sympathy etc

I'm about as good looking as a smack in the mouth with a golf club but just sitting in a local pub I've had girls make conversation (initiated by them). Maybe these are the forward-type?

If you like the look of someone dont you folk approach them?! You aren't ordering food/new shoes. Scared of rejection- 'sorry I'm with someone'? Is that it or is it time? 'I'm too busy to go out looking'? Simplifying the first attraction/falling for someone/stories of how you met down to a commodity (and who was online that day).

I'm quite old fashioned and prefer meeting someone in person first/chance encounter/get to know etc, tbh I'd probably use dating sites purely to procure sex. The dating site thing is like a forum (time-eating).

Finding love is easy, there I was standing in town waiting for a mate, I bump into an old **** buddy from school said hello then remembered her best mate who I dated when I was 15. I get in touch with her, we have first date, I moved in after first date and proposed a month or so later. We get married on the 7th of September and I can't wait.

The second she stepped out of her car on that first meeting I knew I would spend the rest of my life with her.
BOOM simple 😉

The second she stepped out of her car on that first meeting I knew I would spend the rest of my life with her.
BOOM simple

Was she your parole officer?

Was she your parole officer?

Or Psychiatrist...

If you like the look of someone dont you folk approach them?!

How's your restraining order collection going?

[img] [/img]

Binners, I'm a God-damn sexual-Tyrannosaurus. 😆

Little arms, hora? I bet the ladies love that 😆

Was there once a STW singlers ride organised? Time for another or was it only blokes who turned up??

Was there once a STW singlers ride organised? Time for another or was it only blokes who turned up??

I'm not entirely sure that even I would be brave enough for that!! 😯

[i]Was there once a STW singlers ride organised? Time for another or was it only blokes who turned up??[/i]

Indeed there was, and nope there was definitely some female attendance. I think the focus was on riding Swinley and no relationships were formed.
(I was the photographer 🙂 )

Look! A female
[img] [/img]

dashed its a line from the film Predator. Shame on you blokes for not spotting it.

dashed its a line from the film Predator. Shame on you blokes for not spotting it.

Not tried internet dating but if I'm ever single again I'd give it a go. No idea how to chat up women, altho I have successfully managed it a few times I was verr' verr' drunk at the time.

oh yeah thought I'd heard it before but I presumed it was just an STW hora-ism.

All my lines are from Arnie-films or inspired by Brant.

Right come on then, enough online whinging about how crap internet dating is! Let's have another pop at a STW singles ride around Swinley - can't do any harm.

First suggestion - Sunday 7th of July 10:30 start at the trailhead.

No wierdos, desperadoes, perverts or sexual tyrannosauruses - just a fun ride around Swinley with a bunch of like minded folk

Met my OH (Flowerpower) through a website, the local bike club - I was a newbie and she was the MTB rep - I asked a question about "what tyres" and she responded "Black ones!" Now we are happily mortgaged with twa dugs.

Tried Fitness singles and Uniform dating before Stirling Bike Club, I was neither fit nor in uniform so they were bound to fail! 😀

@Dashed - You'd best start a new thread.

First suggestion - Sunday 7th of July 10:30 start at the trailhead.

Well, that's me out then! IOW Sportive on that day...

No wierdos, desperadoes, perverts or sexual tyrannosauruses - just a fun ride around Swinley with a bunch of like minded folk

can i bring my partner we quite like group activities if you know what i mean.

did a bit of dating a while back...met in order of desperation, the dullest nurse in the world, a married woman with issues, and went on a date with a bloke for a favour.

FWB at mins, loads easier LOL

hhmmmm ... nice to hear that some of you have found your soul mate online but rather scary too to hear some of the other stories ... 🙂

Met my GF on an MTB forum that I started, she had just moved down from Newark to my area in North Wales and she saw a poster advertising the forum in a local shop. She joined the forum and asked for a good shop localy to sort out her gears, I offered to meet up and look at them.

You know the one........I've come to fix your gears, but I dont have a bike, I know let's !%&£ (in a greman porn star voice) 😆

We have now been together 4 years.

hhmmmm ... nice to hear that some of you have found your soul mate online but rather scary too to hear some of the other stories ...

Yes. Really should get a profile up on somewhere appropriate like Fitness Singles, but all these stories aren't encouraging me!

Much as I prefer the idea of "something will happen when you least expect it", working in IT with cycling and martial arts as spare time activities appears to add "but don't hold your breath!" 🙂

Indeed there was, and nope there was definitely some female attendance. I think the focus was on riding Swinley and no relationships were formed.

Whilst true that no relationships were formed, one member of the forum at least got a phone number and a subsequent date (though it led nowhere cos of distance involved) ensued! 😉

To be honest, I've done more than my fair share of internet dating, and aside from the creepy "I'm interested in you as a bit on the side" types (though most girls I've met online have got a number of stories about blokes like this approaching them) I've got stories from pretty much every angle. There have been girls I've been interested in nothing more than sex with, there have been girls that have used me, there have been girls I've really liked that has not been requited and there have been girls that have fallen for me that I've not been interested in. There have also been a couple of girls that DEFINITELY ate the girl in their photos seemingly, you'd be surprised just how many girls have put on 5+ stone in about as many months (How is this physically possible? I can eat 5000+ calories a day and even with no exercise, still only gain a couple of pounds in a month!), and then there was the girl that I fell in love with and then she screwed me over!

But just as I was ready to give it all up as a lost cause yet again, I met my current GF, and we've been together for coming up to 12 months now. It is very cliched, but the key to finding love is to stop looking for it! I was just about to close my POF profile when my GF messaged me, and I almost didn't even bother reading her email... Just as well I did, she's even a keen cyclist now (or will be again when her collarbone heals)!