[Closed] Crap Instructions

shouldn't they be in welsh

Is crap not in the swear filter? 😯

It's not really a swear I don't think.

I reckon the UK citizenship test should include a section on how to use a lavatory, that should stop this sort of nonsense.

Anyone without a UK passport should be restricted to using a "hole in the ground" type lavatory, and given a bucket of water/access to tap afterwards to wash their arse.

LOL - apart from its deadly serious.

One site I worked in had this problem - due to ethnic cultures etc.

Also they we had signs for not urinating in the sinks. To walk in and disturb that process "in flow" was always way more jaw dropping.

Different worlds and all that. It got cleaned up eventually.

I recall using long drop toilets in Africa - a whole with two planks across for squatting on - and found that the squat position lends itself to a more thorough emptying than the [s]British[/s] English/Scottish/N.Irish sitting position.

he he. Anyone who has worked with offshore guys coming onshore will have come across this. Used toilet paper thrown in the corner (what did you think would happen with that?), footprints on the seat. Crap all over the seat because they missed (yep, don't bother wiping it down will you?), crap in the corner of the cubicle, bottle of shitty water in the corner of the cubicle... the list goes on and on.

Cultural differences.... By the way, higher caste Indians have some very strong views on lower castes and will regard them with immense distaste, like they're animals....

One company I worked at bought a big house on a posh estate to put all the offshore guys up in. Some turned up and complained there were no staff. Others turned up and immediately used the pool table for a barbeque. Always a laugh dropping the guys off there. We would roll up in the car and there would be three naked guys stood on the front lawn hosing each other down. This on an estate where the houses cost about 400k each. Brilliant! 😉

thegrateape +1

After a trip to Nepal, I had to resist the urge to poo in the garden.

One site I worked in had this problem - due to ethnic cultures etc.

Also they we had signs for not urinating in the sinks.

I've worked on a site where the English painters had a habit of peeing down the sinks/wash basin 'cause they were too lazy to walk to the bogs. Unconnected to the water supply, and during the summer months, the trapped piss in the u bends started to seriously stink after a couple of days.

This week at the site I'm working on someone peed right against the main entrance of the block being built, the yellow piss-holes in the pure white snow where quite unmistakable. The prime suspect was the very english mouthy plumber.

Many years ago I was working on a site doing studwork, I had loaded the unit out with timber and had the drawings laid out on the floor ready to go, when I realised I didn't have any nails. I was gone for 10 minutes at the most, when I returned someone had had a dump in the corner and used my drawings to wipe their arse - I kid you not. The only people working nearby were the brickies - all english as I recall.

I could go on, but suffice to say that building workers, whatever their cultural origins, tend to be disgusting and only semi-civilised. Which at least lets me off the hook when it comes to behavioural standards 🙂

new building I go to has warning stickers above the urinals warning not to fill the kettle from the urinal flush as it's reclaimed water (from the roof etc).

Not sure I have ever felt the need to fill a kettle from the urinal flush 😕

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there are lots of people here in germany that have similar signs in their home toilets....

i piss in the sink to avoid any confusion/offence.

I have to say the mess found in most university toilets you'd assume the people there had no knowledge of what a toilet was or how to use it. People who assume urinals are bad and so they'll spray the toilets from top to bottom as if they didn't bother controlling anything. Never seen issues with number twos though.

Who the hell would sit on a toilet like that in the no picture.. LOL!!!!

Is crap not in the swear filter?

nah, it's just taken from Mr Crapper's surname

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Crapper

There was a similar thing in a major bank I once worked in.

Michealmcc - ever worked with folk from other countrys

When i worked in equatorial guinea i worked with workshop full of locals , not one toilet seat in the place ! - thats exactly how they used the toilets in the workshop as they had never seen toilets before just long drops

Different strokes for different folks !

There's a good argument that long drop toilets are actually more hygenic than our seats.

Unless its a short drop long drop and you see rats through the hole !

I particularly enjoy using toilets where I have to wipe all the piss off the seat before I sit down (not).

Nothing to do with ethnicity, just lazy, dirty bastards - with small penises who seem aversed to using urinals and incapable of lifting a loo seat.

Squatters are far better than sitters, you get a more satisfactory experience because that's the natural position. There's nothing better on a bike ride than popping behind a wall, digging a small pit with your heel, dropping your shorts, nipping off a quickie, wiping up with moss or leaves, covering up and getting on your way. If you're lucky you can find a location with a great view over the valley.

it's easier just to do it in the car park before you set out ime - saves you the risk of breaking your flow plus you'll have paper in the car.

*Note to self*
Never buy shorts off globalti or konabunny 😉

it's easier just to do it in the car park before you set out ime

And I find it's easier to do it at home before setting out. Something which I've been doing probably since I was first potty trained.