Cougar's English Fi...
 

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[Closed] Cougar's English Fictionary

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Liking this thread; lots of grins


 
Posted : 14/10/2019 9:46 pm
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Zark: the last word on the subject of animal boats.


 
Posted : 14/10/2019 10:20 pm
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Parrot - an acceptable level of deterioration


 
Posted : 14/10/2019 10:31 pm
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Nark - Noah was annoyed that he had one less boat that the optimum number


 
Posted : 14/10/2019 10:43 pm
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Platter: purveyor of a specific hairstyle


 
Posted : 14/10/2019 11:37 pm
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Coffee - Person over whom the cougher has coughed.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 12:38 am
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Hark - to return to a favourite style of boat building


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 6:10 am
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Fark- Noah realises the plan's in Cubits, and he's ordered the wood in feet.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 6:18 am
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Quark: A really really small boat.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 7:23 am
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Muon: The act of loading the Quark with bovines.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 7:23 am
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Vegan - the nagging feeling that something is missing from your meal when you're staring at the plate of veg


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 7:46 am
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One for the electrical engineers here,
Megavars - a receptacle for massive flowers.

Which leads to,
Receptacle - proof of payment to an optician.

(edit - quark and muon, very clever)


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 8:54 am
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Draft : Escape vehicle from the Dark. Used by Noah to get away from sea sick tigers and God's auditing team, who had just been presented with invoices for a staggering amount of wood.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:40 am
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Bereft - When the brewing process goes disastrously wrong.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:56 am
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Bereft – When the brewing process goes disastrously wrong

See also “cocktail”


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 10:02 am
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See also “cocktail”

See also : Lagerfeld


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 10:03 am
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Bumptious : Nagging feeling that your guts will let go like a bag of slippers down a lift shaft after knowing full well that the homebrew comsumed the previous evening was Lagerfeld, Cocktail or Bereft, but still drinking 8 pints of it anyway.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 10:15 am
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Lark
one of them poorly made foreign boats which we wont have to put up with for much longer.... or will we
bloody foreign boats coming over here taking our animals


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 10:22 am
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Draft : Escape vehicle from the Dark

Should have tried Craft before Draft


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 10:29 am
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Pimento : Small but incredibly irritating spot on the side of your nose, just where you glasses rest.

Cranberries : The items that your three year old niece posts through the hole in the front of your bass speaker.

Codswallop : Giving someone a comedy smack about the head with an unusual object that results in an unintentional broken nose.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 11:56 am
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Commute - Two people unable to share a few words.
Barrage - Getting really annoyed by slow service in a pub.
Copulate - Tardy policemen


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 11:58 am
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Brant - a second rate tirade


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 11:59 am
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Labour - one who goes on and on about sex they've had.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 12:11 pm
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Farage - The anger felt about distant things that you don't understand.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 12:16 pm
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Memento: Mints you own.

Nacho cheese: Dairy product you don't own.

Used by Noah to get away from sea sick tigers

And ill eagles.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 12:17 pm
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Farage – The anger felt about distant things that you don’t understand.

Very prescient!


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 12:28 pm
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Spandex : A list of bridges.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 1:28 pm
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Dork: A nerdy / clumsy troll.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 1:31 pm
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Cougar. A Scottish confectionary made with sugar or honey, roasted nuts, whipped egg whites, and beef.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 1:39 pm
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Spreadsheet : Vile revenge performed on a neighbour's car door handles after their cat has crapped once too often in your petunias.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 1:52 pm
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Cougar. A Scottish confectionary made with sugar or honey, roasted nuts, whipped egg whites, and beef.

I've been to Scotland, that's pretty plausible.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 2:15 pm
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Dork and Spandex are both excellent.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 3:05 pm
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Spindrift - falling out of political statement masseurs


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 3:48 pm
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Baselayer - Hitman specifically targeting best friends.
Phobic - Enemy of cheap pens.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 3:51 pm
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Canopy : The one the you shouldn’t drink at the end of a student party or long distance coach ride.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 3:52 pm
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Cacophony : Mexican rubber turd.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 4:14 pm
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Bigamist - very thick fog

Fetish - bearing a resemblance to a fictional bounty hunter.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 4:35 pm
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Undeterred - crapped in your pants.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 7:02 pm
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^lol


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 8:51 pm
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Edinburgh: got stuck whilst looking for rabbits.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:01 pm
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Fictionary - HtS's output at work since this thread started


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:07 pm
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Carrot - the deterioration of a car


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:16 pm
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Cougar. A Scottish confectionary made with sugar or honey, roasted nuts, whipped egg whites, and beef.

I’ve been to Scotland, that’s pretty plausible.

I actually got a bit peckish just typing that.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:20 pm
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Railing - a young Ray, very rare in the UK as the population numbers never recovered from the annual fire festival of Rayburn.

Rayburn - fire festival occurring on November 5th each year. Stopped after Parliament took action and introduced the Rayban. Protecting the remaining Rays by encouraging people to burn the much more common Guy. Early take up of Guy burning was slow with many town's folk continuing to try and burn Rays. In one of the earliest ever recorded marketing campaigns town criers were instructed to shout 'Guys Folks' in the hours leading upto the burn. Ultimately the this gave the new festival it's name although this true origin has been largely lost in popular mythology.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:29 pm
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Tarka - Yorkshire based fabricator of vessels for live export, corruption of the term Arkwright.

Pavey Ark - the one where initial impetus for construction was flagging.

Parky - an average key.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:37 pm
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Postoperative: someone who used to be a mail man


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:38 pm
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Unruly - scaleless measuring stick.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 9:57 pm
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Quasar - apparently but not really a Tsar. A person brought in by Government to address an issue. Sold to the public as someone who will spearhead the rectification or resolution of the problem. Usually no more than a figurehead with little power to take meaningful action.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 10:03 pm
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Forskin - a golf warning shouted at Skunk Anansi's lead singer.


 
Posted : 15/10/2019 10:07 pm
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Daimler.- A lady-den.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 12:55 am
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Venerable.- A herd of unruly deer.

Particulate.- A coffee-house in Glasgow's West-End.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 1:45 am
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Friable - simplest form of food classification, thought to be Scottish in origin. Edible being an assessment of attainment by an Edward.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 6:21 am
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Istanbul: London charity event
Cadiz: where golf clubs come from
Poland; home of a Teletubby
Iceland: previously known as Bejams
Efficiency: what Hull trawlermen pursue
Condescend: letter from a Nigerian prince
Condominium: flavoured barrier method
Cackhanded: fingers through the paper
Manslaughter: gallows humour
Therapist: Jeffrey Epstein


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 6:26 am
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Rectification: a period following gentrification where a neighbourhood reverts back to being a shithole


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 6:32 am
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Tryout - helping the confused leave a building

Triumph - a suggestion that an individual needs to put their back into it


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 7:25 am
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Predator - the bloke your Missus used to date before you


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 8:09 am
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Syntax - the money that HMRC collect from brothels


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 8:20 am
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Polaroid : Frost bite of the arse.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 8:28 am
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Instagram: Coke vending machine.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 8:40 am
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Arcade : Charity concert arranged by Noah to raise funds for building a Zark.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 12:00 pm
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Orchid: Noddy Holder’s little brother.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 2:16 pm
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Kipper Tie : Noddy Holder's favourite hot drink.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 3:37 pm
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Orgasm: the gap between the two prongs on a rowlock
Brexit: term applied to the eternally inept diy bodger and fixer
Rotivation: fear of roundabouts
Gastric Band: Pub gig towards the end of the evening
Dildo: Herb infused pastry


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 4:19 pm
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Misplace - Appropriate lodgings for young ladies.
Torpedo - Perverts Hill, (literal translation)


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 5:26 pm
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Fallacy - a bit like a penis.
Logical fallacy - a single mis-step in a sequence that makes you look like a cock.
Onomatopoeia - drunken urination on the only absorbent item in a wood-floored hallway


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 5:30 pm
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Tuiles - part of a bus, go round and round.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 7:33 pm
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Onomatopoeia - partaking of a magic carpet ride


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 7:38 pm
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Barrage - getting shirty because the landlord won't serve you a 12th pint.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 7:51 pm
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Tabatha - cigarette smoke

Cheddar - remote revolutionary sensing system


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 9:26 pm
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Fanatic - where a sinister celebrity keeps their greatest.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 9:35 pm
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adage - when you add years to your true age to get served in a pub


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 9:40 pm
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Sleepy - a nocturnal van or tent based dichotomy that occurs when you haven't the bottle.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 9:42 pm
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carpet - the spider that lives in my Mondeo


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 9:48 pm
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Morbidity - to ask for another beverage from the bum sink

Undertow - the inability to count in french


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 10:03 pm
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Misdemeanor - Reduced financial profligacy in light fog.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 10:07 pm
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Arcade - what Mr Edwards parents/siblings refer to him as.


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 10:08 pm
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Undertow – the inability to count in french

That's my favourite for today


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 10:16 pm
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Ripen - Bic experiment with a grain based plastic substitute

Postcard - the nearly paperless society


 
Posted : 16/10/2019 10:20 pm
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Masticate: it’s short for..... Bob.


 
Posted : 17/10/2019 12:08 am
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Comprador.- Life insurance for Matadors.

Orgone.- Where 'The Goonies' was filmed.


 
Posted : 17/10/2019 3:35 am
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