[Closed] Commonwealth opening ceremony

Worse even than the Olympics opening ceremony???

poor so far

I'm very, very sorry.

I was at the rehearsal, and I didn't warn any of you.

I'm so sorry.

Having worked with big screens in the past, I have to pay say, that screen is astonishing. Brilliant in fact.

The rest of it, however?

Did Alec S really say, with any real conviction, that this was going to be better than London 2012? Hahahahahahahaha. Ha.

I'm very, very sorry.

I was at the rehearsal, and I didn't warn any of you.

I'm so sorry.

**** you

The ceremony is so much better with the STW online commentary here - can the BBC not set it as a red button special feature?

Actually, the Calvin Harris remix was pretty good for real, but the commentators kept talking over it.

Guess I chose the wrong night to start taking acid.

anyone else think the "Come on in....." bit sounds like the Price is right TV show?? "Come on down..india!"

footflaps - Member

You can help people in Scotland learn basic skills, like singing, dancing and sitting on chairs. Please give whatever you can, this is a historic opportunity to help these people and end their suffering...

They are good at claiming benefits aren't they in the Glasgow area? Yes?

mogrim - Member

Worse even than the Olympics opening ceremony???

Nope. Far better coz there are Terriers ...

Ha, this is great. Equal parts self deprecation and cliche with a sprinkle of the arts and pop culture. It could never live up to what was put on in London, so why bother to try.

The music has been ace and that screen is mint.

The rehearsal was funny in parts, using stand-ins.

Though it was only when the Queen came in tonight that I realised I was a bit naive to think she'd be in a Ford Focus like the stand-in.

Switched over pretty much immediately, as soon as it turned to charity cringe fest hosted by Ewan McCheesygrin.

(Not enjoying the UNICEF plugs and VTs though - does that make me a bad person?)

Painful.

Agree with above, the screen is amazing. Everything else is astonishingly appalling.

bencooper - Member

I'm very, very sorry.

I was at the rehearsal, and I didn't warn any of you.

I'm so sorry.

😆

The UNICEF thing is very grating - "Let's welcome Papua New Guinea - it's pretty f***ed up there, so please give money".

No miss hooley from Balamory disappointed 😕

What is with the guys with the flat caps and scottie dogs?
Don't they know that a scottie would be considered lunch in parts of Glasgow.

Can't wait to see the Scots in their kit. Having seen the pics of it is going to be awful

Although quite liking a bit of Future Sound of London there

Make sure no one has left the bath taps running upstairs!

Thought Australia were supposed to be split into their individual states to stop them embarrassing everyone else by winning so many golds.

grahamt1980 - Member

What is with the guys with the flat caps and scottie dogs?

Luckily they have not dressed up the terriers with flag colours ... that will be head off indeed. 😆

Ok, sweep on when we see one of the skye terriers shit on the track?

Ok, sweep on when we see one of the scotties shit on the track?

I'll put a £10 on some of the team having died of shame before they even walk on....

Damn, too slow ^ +1

Lesotho win at hats.

Will there be someone claiming asylum at Independent Scotland ...

Yep, team England.

Will there be someone claiming asylum at Independent Scotland ...

After this, I think I might vote No.

Not if they have to wear the scottish team kit, they won't

Sierra Leone win at onesies. They'll fit right in on the late night booze runs to tescos.

bencooper - Member

Will there be someone claiming asylum at Independent Scotland ...

After this, I think I might vote No

😆 I don't think you should worry because those claiming asylum will simply migrate south before they are blamed for the opening ceremony.

grahamt1980 - Member

Not if they have to wear the scottish team kit, they won't

Ya, only when they know that they also need to wear fish net singlet like Rab C Nesbitt 😆

Edit: shouldn't they also include US of Merica in the game too since they were once conquered land?

Is it wrong to be hoping that Rab appears there somewhere

Is it me or do the announcements sound like they are saying [b]'moan then[/b]

"'Moan then Uganda. Square go ya bam!"

grahamt1980 - Member
Is it wrong to be hoping that Rab appears there somewhere

I'm still waiting for Supergran.

grahamt1980 - Member

Is it wrong to be hoping that Rab appears there somewhere

If he appears I will order deep fried Mars bar next time I visit them ... 😀

Will Hagrid and his giant dog lead out Scotland?

I'm still waiting for Supergran.

I want a like button.

Out of interest who picked the music for each area? Not stereotyping are they

No miss hooley from Balamory disappointed

The Cameroonian wearing the Aberdeen FC hat maybe the first to claim asylum I reckon. Dead give away.

Some great commentary..."hovercraft full of eels"...WTF?!

No PC Plum 🙁

you do realise that when they vote yes in sept all the english will statistically live an extra 9 months..

At London 2012 each nation came in with a metal Heatherwick petal that was shoved on the end of a gas filled pipe and turned into a giant torch.

Here they are coming on with a scottie dog for each nation.....it could get messy in 20 odd minutes if they try to pull off the same trick!

^^^not if we all have already died by laughing ourselves to death tonight

I think I've seen that scottie before. Are they reusing them?

lemonysam - Member
I think I've seen that scottie before. Are they reusing them?

Even Hitler isn't impressed:

you do realise that when they vote yes in sept all the english will statistically live an extra 9 months.

Even the 8% of the Scottish population that are English?

The canadians appear to have made their trousers out of a tablecloth from a truck stop somewhere on the A9.

Whats with the whole unicef thing? This is meant to be about sport.

tbe whole thing is cheesy as hell. Don't producers realise that we are a potentially smart nation who want more than corny special needs saturday night tv bull. All that 1980s scottish old man singing, Rod (not scottish) Stewart and wtf susan boyle.

I did hear one slight redeeming factor in a snippet of KLF!

Great to see the England team saunter out with their hands in their pockets. 😀

And a bit of Aphex Twin...

Apologies if done already..

The Commonwealth Games. How is this still a thing?

Breaking news: Scottish athletes pull out of commonwealth games on mass as they don't want to look like total fannIes. Wai, t too late.......

A man from Malta has got sunburnt in scotland. This can never have happened before, surely?

Good work the Northern Ireland team. Not a hint of orange in the outfit. 😀

The peeps in the over 70s aerobics class in the background must be knackered by now.

WTF are you wearing?

Hahahahahaha!

Did you see Jimmy Krankie in the green dress?

Scotland are on Aciiiiiid

Here they are...

Though I think the colour balance on my TV must be broken....

The Shamen? Mint!

That's brown tartan looks like a child has shat out some half digested Lego.

310 atheletes. I didn't realise we had that many atheletes.

They really should have got Frankie Boyle to present this programme!

Scottish team look like they've got lost on a club 18-30 pub crawl out there

Scottish outfits are fabulous.

Move any mountain...political message?

A bit more Rod. I think he's got a sore throat.

Rod again? Jeeeeesus. Pass the whisky.

Someone get that man a Locket.

Oooh it's Wodnee!

After a horrendous opening sequence I thought Mylo did pretty well with the live set , some class tunes in there and even a Cameroon Athlete with an Aberdeen Fc hat on. 😀

Rod reminded me of this:

I might donate if it stops Rod Stewart coming back out!

[quote=stanfree ]After a horrendous opening sequence I thought Mylo did pretty well with the live set , some class tunes in there and even a Cameroon Athlete with an Aberdeen Fc hat on.

[img] [/img]

Well after all that cheese....donated

Put your hands in your pockets ya miserable gits - if only for the laugh they gave us.

Where is Alex Salmon when you need him to address the audience? Freeeeedom!

😯