[Closed] Careers, mid life crisis and retirement.

C'est la vie.

Yep - except I am likely to have to be looking for a new career in the next few years as government cuts bite still further. 22 years to claim my pension, fed up of being at threat of redundancy/job loss all the time (and having been made redundant before I know it can acually be quite positive when it happens, but stil...)

Not sure what the answer is really. I am the sole earner for the family as well, so options like starting a business etc are doubly risky.

Mindfulness is probably a good approach - focus on the positives and all that!

Yes, it can be difficult in the mid forties where you contemplate the future etc.

I have just retired at 60 and sort of went through the experiences you are now feeling.

My best advice is to get the work / life balance correct.

It was necessary to work and have a career, but not at the expense of your life.

Whatever it is that you and your family enjoy, then make this a bigger part of your life.
to a certain extent I let work take me over a little ( probably alot), but I wished in hindsight that I hadn't spent so much time and energy focusing on my work / career to be honest.

Have a reflect on the things you want to do, whilst acknowledging that working will be just a part of the journey .

I did make reasonable plans with pensions to allow me to retire at 60, and I don't miss work one bit now.

I can usually be found riding around Afan most days of the week if the weather is reasonable, all the things in life ( outside of work) have taken on a new perspective.

Have a long think about what you really want to do, and treat work as a vehicle to achieving those goals.
Regards

Denis

My main worry is that my career as a teacher isnt viable up to retirement age of 68 or whatever it currently is.

Not sure what the answer is really.

Which unless anyone pops up with something inspirational probably IS that answer. Despite youthful ambitions to be the RS6 driving, posh house owning sharp suite wearing pretentious git, the realisation of actuality as the day to day nearly man is here.

I'm not depressed about it, just curious about this point in life really.

Denis - useful, thanks.

My main worry is that my career as a teacher isnt viable up to retirement age of 68 or whatever it currently is.

There will be people 'dying in harness'.

I have 14 years left until retirement, young children means I will probably have to work right up until the last second, but I struggle with this as well.
Also aware without the job I wouldn't have the bikes and all the other lifestyle options that go with the pay cheque.
Thinking positively helps, mindfulness is good practice,also set myself goals whether biking targets such as tougher challenges on road or MTB. I do find that keeping fit helps with being positive and riding helps clear the mind of all the daily crap.

Went to a 4 day week in my 30's
Aiming for a 3 day week in my 40's

Earn ok money but not great, drive old cheap cars, buy second hand bikes, don't go on many foreign holidays but live in a nice part of the world.

Work smart not hard.

I'm just vomiting up words whilst on the throne

I always said you talk a lot of shit...

There will be people 'dying in harness'.

Indeed, I know one person in their late 50's who had a heart attack in front of the class! I expect a lot of teachers will be on long term sick leave too. Crazy.

[quote=Kryton57 ]Despite youthful ambitions to be the RS6 driving, posh house owning sharp suite wearing pretentious gitMaybe it helped that I never had that dream 🙂

The affordability of retirement is directly related to how much you are spending now though. If you really are serious about getting out early then you need to take a look at where your money is going. Mind you, it's hard to fight that desire for instant gratification.

(retired at 50 - now working 3 day weeks half the year because I [i]want[/i] to)

Kryton - were you expecting someone to give you a sealed envelope with a purpose, a point, a goal in it just for you?

You have to come up with your own aims in life. If you haven't got one, start thinking about it. Unless your aim in life involves bikes it's probably not on STW, but do let us know what you discover 🙂

See if you can accumulate some assets to enable early retirement either through your house and/or savings/investments. Aim to buy a small, well insulated place (unlikely to be a country cottage) and get your overheads right down. My income dropped £30k pa by taking early retirement but I've barely noticed it and certainly don't miss work. While you are working you need to actively engage in escapes, release mechanisms and travel to keep your head level.
Agreed AA, I've taught in schools that would've destroyed me completely at 68. Maybe it's a conspiracy to save on pensions.

My best advice is to get the work / life balance correct.

More people are wising up to this.

A good few years ago someone like Denis gave me the same advice.
It's all about connecting to a quality of life that suits you and the people you care about.Not always easy,but I am glad I made the choice sooner than later.

Personally I wouldn't make any assumptions about job or career security. Automation/technology/globalisation has come for the low-skill jobs already and is now coming for the higher-skilled jobs. Certainly incomes are static.

I don't think your current same old same old is likely to be the same or even be there over the next 5-10 years.

You can turn these changes into a positive - it means you have new opportunities to do something else. You just have to keep your eye out for the risks to your current line of work and look for where the new opportunities are and be prepared to retrain/move etc etc

There's nothing new in folk dying whilst still at working age.

As life expectancy has increased so has fitness and wellbeing. On average, people are healthier for longer. Maybe we'll start to see a "phased retirement" where folk cut back on hours rather than work for a set period then stop completely.

Volunteering can help put things in perspective, particularly if it involves getting out and about.
I get a good feeling after doing a litter pick or helping out at a work group that can help set me up for the week.
Actually it's the only time when I feel at peace these days.

Retired at 55. It's great. Takes a few years to calm down, come off the treadmill. Appreciate the time and opportunity to enjoy my riding, friends family. I'm not rich but want for nothing really. I'm happy. What price happiness and a MTB to ride the trails?

If you don't have your health what have you got? A pile of bricks and cash? What good is all that when your 60 plus and can't enjoy your riding or life? I realised that it's best to make the most of my good health now and leave early. My middle son persuaded me.

I believe that when I reach state retirement age and beyond I'm going to need less because my ability and physical strength will have diminished.

I'm not depressed about it, just curious about this point in life really.

There isn't any, it's you. The Greek oracle at Delphi had written above the door 'know thy self'. Wise words for people seeking answers to questions.

We can only do what makes each of us happy at the moment in time.

I moved from heavy ,cold manual career in meat industry to the care sector after life happenings ,my dad passing early 2 years after his retirement .

We then moved country so my wife could be closer to her mother to support through illness,recently departed too now .

So we look again at our lot.

We are mortgage free,live in a great part of Ireland ,rural,i work 3/4 days a week n wife now does 3 nights , and plan to make the most of our lot being late 40s/early 50s.

Just do whats right for you n yours .

the realisation of actuality as the day to day nearly man is here.

Your work / life balance is a bit skewed if that's how you view your existance. I've not been a high flyer at my job but I have credibility in my workplace, but I am more focused on my home life.

My first career ended in redundancy at 30. Spent the last 16 years getting a degree and drifting in the civil service as it fitted work/life balance but meant turning down chances to progress so I could be around for the kids to cover wifes part time role.

Now stuck in that rut and facing 21 years to retirement, which has caused a few mental issues this year.

Luckily MrsMC wants to go back to full time and restart her much better paid career. She starts in 2 weeks time. I'm hoping to go to a 3 day week, term time only to cover childcare. We will have enough money now and in the future, I can increase my hours as the kids get older, and I won't be stressing trying to be a full time employee and a part time dad/husband.

Cannot wait

*frowns at HR who are dragging their feet*

I took voluntary redundancy from a well paid but stressful and unfulfilling (to me) job about 4 years ago. Did some voluntary work, MA bit of contracting. Now back in the harness, albeit 4 days a week. Not really happy though, so will prob leave in next 12 months (also turn 50 in next 6 months). Was happiest been for years doing MA so thinking about doing PhD, but I don't really have immediate money concerns. Cheapish lifestyle and no kids, also Mrs OD is lucratively employed and does not care what I do as long as contribute to joint account.

Things I found coming out of work is that I need companionship and goals. This is probably why I enjoyed going back Uni - particularly because goals are substantially self set and consequence of failure is personal. I need to think about how I can translate that into paying work.

But in general I think it is key to get proper work life balance and that is something I struggle with. Not least exercise, put on 10lb since starting back at work last December.

That is a lot of words and not much insight I'm afraid. No magic formula is perhaps the point I'm making, but it has been interesting trying stuff out and finding out about how I feel and act once outside, and now back in work.

Kryton - were you expecting someone to give you a sealed envelope with a purpose, a point, a goal in it just for you?

In honesty there's some truth here. At work I excelled at what I did long enough for my peers and mentors to move me up / take me with them for quite a period - 15 years maybe, so I was never having to try hard at progression, (I was working very hard). Now the realisation has dawn that I'm not [i]needed [/i]to further others careers, and if I want to progress I need to find my own way. However, I work in a politically dominated area, and I don't have the necessary political or social skills to "grease the pole" as it were.

I recently (see [url= http://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/shooting-for-the-stars-or-floating-with-the-driftwood ]this thread[/url]) wrote my ideal next JD for me current boss on his advice, as we are potentially facing a re-org soon - I suspect he will become my bosses boss. Who knows whether that will help or hinder my immediate future.

I'm lucky to be well paid and WFH so have a lot of flexibility with my current aims of spending time with the kids, training, riding & racing bikes myself and my 6yo my son. Thats a lot to be happy about.

But I get bored easily, and would like the next 20 years to hold a fruitful challenge. To which, some really good points up there thanks.

@ Teasel, you're not wrong. 😐

hold a fruitful challenge

I missed the edit window - I don't mean just about work...

Is there any more fruitful challenge than parenthood?

A few years back my other half and I decided to focus on what we really wanted from life i.e. happy family life balance with our children(not working long hours), time to keep healthy, live in an area we wanted to be (not the city etc) ...that meant we have since tried to make our decisions based on these values (which essentially came down to earning less money and understanding we wouldn't be at the top of the career tree anymore)- less money means we do have to have a smaller house and mortgage, cheaper cars, cheaper holidays, cheaper bikes etc...but we wouldn't change it for the world. Feels good not to focus our lives into the workplace....

As I approached my 40's (right in the middle now) these thoughts became more common. They remain so.

For me, I need a degree of challenge in my working life - but it is important to not let it consume me/my family time/time for my other interests. I do not always succeed at this. Balance (pretty much in everything you do) seems to be the key.

Denis99 words above seem full of wisdom to me. Thank you.

I'm in the same situation, but I figure that whilst I have a well paying job which I don't mind doing, I may as well carry on and not rock the boat as it's a pretty good situation to be in. I'm sure at some point an external factor will force my hand (company merger, liquidation, sale etc).

I think mazz and footflaps posts above sum it up from a work perspective.

scotroutes - Member
Is there any more fruitful challenge than parenthood?

Indeed!

Cruised for 20 years in a job that would have seen me through if redundancy hadn't reared its ugly head. Started again with a new company and after 3 years realised that I was going nowhere and I would hate myself had I stuck it there any longer.

Just moved again into a management position and it scares me to death. New product, new responsibilities etc. A few sleepless nights and a few "oh shit" moments, but when retirement comes (17 years) I will be able to live with myself knowing that I've given it a shot.

I work on an NHS mental health ward, it's just a revolving door with the same patients every so often, moved from acute to challenging behaviour, patients are carbon copies, drug induced or lazy/unmotivated as why should they change when they have everything paid for and still get benefits

Another 30 years of that

Saving grace is it's only 3 days a week, albeit 14 hour shifts, so I get to spend quality time with the kids, did a couple of 9-5s this week and it was awful just getting home as they were getting ready for bed

I was made redundant last year. Had been in the job over twenty years - and probably 10 years too long.
I hated the last few years there, but lacked the courage to quit (well paid job on doorstep etc).
So redundancy gave me the opportunity to do something I really wanted to do for the last 20 years of my working life.
I am now in university. With a guaranteed job doing what I really want to do for the last few years.
Life is too short to be wished away.

You already have a marvellous life.

You just can't accept it.

here's some truth here. At work I excelled at what I did long enough for my peers and mentors to move me up / take me with them for quite a period - 15 years maybe, so I was never having to try hard at progression, (I was working very hard). Now the realisation has dawn that I'm not needed to further others careers, and if I want to progress I need to find my own way. However, I work in a politically dominated area, and I don't have the necessary political or social skills to "grease the pole" as it were.

Ever heard of peters principle...

Yep - except I am likely to have to be looking for a new carer

FIFY

Approaching mid-forties and I have a chance of boosting my 18-year career by launching a new product I've been working on for a while. If it's successful, it'll see me through another ten years of having a real reason to jump out of bed every morning. If it fails, it'll be the kick I need to get out. We're DINKs and looking to pay mortgages off in five to ten years. After that, I really would like to drop down to three days a week, work locally and start some voluntary activity.

Wtf is a dink?

Double Income No Kids

Ever heard of peters principle...

I hadn't, but googled it. It'd apply in my case, but I won't learn anything new unless I take a leap.

Anyway, its not all about the job as mentioned. I think as some have implied, perhaps I need to be content with the job of bring up the kids and part time racing.

[quote=Spin ]

My main worry is that my career as a teacher isnt viable up to retirement age of 68 or whatever it currently is.

As scotroutes wrote, nothing new there - in the last 20 years, the life expectancy at age 65 has increased by an average of 3-4 years, so 68 is the new 65 in terms of the likelihood of dying before reaching retirement.

I work on an NHS mental health ward, it's just a revolving door with the same patients every so often, moved from acute to challenging behaviour, patients are carbon copies, drug induced or lazy/unmotivated as why should they change when they have everything paid for and still get benefits
Another 30 years of that

When I think about changing my current life which basically involves raping the planet to provide a comfy life for myself, mental health care is one of the areas I think about. Sounds like I should consider carefully if I'd just be fooling myself.

dirtyrider - Member

I work on an NHS mental health ward, it's just a revolving door with the same patients every so often, moved from acute to challenging behaviour, patients are carbon copies, drug induced or lazy/unmotivated as why should they change when they have everything paid for and still get benefits

The caring NHS then. Mental health patients with challenging behaviour. Who'd have thought it? I have a close relative who has an ongoing mental health condition which resulted in her being in a mental health ward once. She has worked for years and her condition has been well controlled with the help of a great Doctor and CPNs. Glad she wasn't on your ward.

it's just a revolving door with the same patients every so often

Pretty much what you expect as there is very little resource available to treat the underlying issues, which would mean long term treatment in the community.

As scotroutes wrote, nothing new there - in the last 20 years, the life expectancy at age 65 has increased by an average of 3-4 years, so 68 is the new 65 in terms of the likelihood of dying before reaching retirement

Will certainly make for a memorable lesson.

Bear in mind that when the state pension was introduced male life expectancy was 68, so the system was geared up to support people for an average of 3 years from a retirement age of 65.

My state and new civil service pensions kick in at 67 - I'm hoping to get beyond 70!

My only mid-life crisis is that my 41 year old body won't allow me to do the things that my 25 year old mind wants it to do. As for careers, until now I've never really had a career, just jobs that pay the bills, however now with the realisation that there's maybe less (hopefully) time working ahead of me than behind, I figure I should apply myself a bit more in terms of work.

It's funny cos I look around my office and see loads of high flyer tyoes in senior positions who are my age or younger, and they don't come across as very happy. Which may be something to do with the fact they all got on the career ladder straight out of uni and never allowed themselves to enjoy themselves when they were young. Thankfully that's not a problem I ever had.

Semi retirement looming for me in 2 years when I'm 47. Have to say I've had a fun and interesting time so far. Having no kids which was never a plan just the way it happened helps a lot in the not working full time stakes.

[quote=anagallis_arvensis ]Will certainly make for a memorable lesson.

As it always has. I'd put money on there being less teachers keeling over in the classroom now even if they go on until 68 than there were when I started school 40 years ago - and I can't remember hearing about when, let alone experiencing it. It's a daft argument given that changes in life expectancy mean that most people can expect to spend longer in retirement even given changes in retirement age.

It's a daft argument

It wasnt an argument but feel free to argue with yourself if you like.

What Dennis99 said. Also, I packed it all in 8 years early - not something I foresaw in my mind 40's. Luckily, I'd made a few financial provisions as well as having a superannuated, final salary pension (don't even think of starting on that!). I've, actually, taken a fair hit, financially but the lifestyle change/choice thing has been more than worth it - you cut your cloth accordingly, bin the stress and chill out.
Life's sweet.

Eh? You only retired a couple of years ago didn't you toxicsoks?

I could not cope with a 50 hour corporate job, I would probably top myself but I admire anyone who can do it - at 52 I just don't have the tolerance

One key point is making some sensible financial retirement plan. Failure to plan in this area is a plan to fail.

Got 6 and half years left in my job and cant wait until fully retired, pay a fortune into my pension and lucky to have been able to. Moral is work hard and save hard but nothing is a given, dont forget to live and enjoy life on the way to retirement.

K57 - last year, matey, which was eight years earlier than I, originally, intended.