[Closed] Cancer.

Survival rates are extremely high, be positive and take care of each other.

My thoughts are with you fella. Have courage, it's not over yet!

It's all very good. It's a very adult week.

Horrible news.

My friend had breast cancer, lumpectomy followed by chemo & radiotherapy.
She's 4 yrs down the line, healthy, happy & following her insurance payouts is working in a field she always wanted to explore.

Good luck to you both.

Ps. I.V.F

Fertility is rather skewed towards the women re: LOADS OF NEEDLES.

Best of luck to you both, a difficult time 🙁

My wife is currently in hospital with a suspected DVT, and has in the past had kidney failure, last year my mom had a full mastectomy due to breast cancer,I feel your pain from both directions, but as someone said above caught early survival is very good now sending all the healing vibes I can spare.

If you love someone, and you believe it, tell them.

pondo, the cancer is getting beaten. Grade one 30cm tumour, radiotherapy + 5 yr Tamoxifen,

Matter of fact, up front and honest, is how we do thngs in this family so that's ok it's the "emotional" side of things rather than the practical.

TBH, for me it's the difficulty grounding the humility and gravitas of being in waiting rooms well beyond my years with couples whose conception and cancerous issues far outweigh our own.

i wish mrs c a speedy full recovery.cancer is definitely treatable today and recovery rates are a lot better today than in the past.good luck to mrs c.

It's the beginning of your (her) journey, not the end.

I had no idea who I was until I was diagnosed with cancer. It was one of the most important things ever to happen to me.

I wish you both all the best.

Healing vibes sent!

We're buying a tandem.

Stay tuned for the "Cancer Recovery Touring Bike" Thread.

[img] [/img]

Scotroutes will be involved. He just found out,

Edit: Hello. What tandem for man +1?

cfinnimore - Member

Life is difficult and love is testing but, at 27, we are answering questions not often asked of parties our age.

If you love someone, and you believe it, tell them today.

Living is hard.

Yes, I have told them.

Good luck to you both. Stay positive. You will get through it.

[i]If you love someone, and you believe it, tell them today.[/i]

Thank you for posting this. I just have.

There's all sorts of stuff to deal with but the difficult bit is dousing the hypothetical.

FERTILITY IS NOT A TRIVIAL MATTER,

Is pretty much the summary of my week,

Also, women bear the burden.A significant fertile burden, Ultimately, we are just ****ing. In a cup.

Good luck to you both.

I had Cancer twice before 23 (testicular and then in my lung).

44 next month 🙂

Lost my mum to the bastard that is breast cancer. She was very unlucky and diagnosed late.

Chin up cfinnimore, the NHS can do wonderful things these days. Just keep the faith.

I once got dropped by a middle aged couple on a tandem. Damn those things can shift.

Tandems welcome here !

Great attitude, wish you both well...

Thinking of you here Chris.

I know a few ladies who are in their seventies and eighties, and a couple in their fifties who are long term survivors of BC.

Best luck for your misses.

Here's hoping for better news after the lumpectomy. Fingers crossed for you both.

We all come on here and have a laugh and talk shit about bicycles and it's sometimes easy to forget that there's a 'back story' going on which is everyone's real lives and all the emotional, physical and logistical stuff that goes on within them.

Every time I read a thread like this and people post their own experiences I'm left feeling amazed (maybe not the right word but neither is humbled and surprised isn't either) at how resilient people are in the way they face issues in their lives and cope with them.

OP - I hope you get a good outcome from all of this and in 10 and 20 and 30 years time you're both looking back at it as 'well it was difficult but we got through it physically and emotionally and look where we are now' part of your lives together.

All the best to the both of you. I was diagnosed with Testicular Cancer last year and know how important it is to have people you love around you. Stay strong.

Soon to be Mrs Mashiehood was diagnosed with Breast Cancer in September last year. It was invasive but caught early and she had a lumpectomy a couple of weeks later. The recommendation was to not have chemotherapy but we were unsure and had an Oncotype DX test to make sure. The results came back with a high risk of recurrence and so came chemo, which was hard but she was really well cared for and got through it.

Just finishing radiotherapy, 3 weeks to go and thereafter, Tamoxifen for the next 10 years. She also had an ultrasound and CT scan last week with nothing to report.

The initial shock left us paralysed for a week or so, after which my 'we need a plan' hat came out of the man draw and off we went. Look after her, give her all the support she needs. You will get through this. Drop me an email if you want to chat through more or if Mrs C wants to talk to Miss M.

Take care.

I survived cancer and now 42 years later am still here and still living a life. It can be beaten. Take heart. Be strong.

Everybody on here is on your, and your wife's, side. If we can do anything, just ask.

Theres a buddhist saying that I keep coming back to, it equates to something like, 'life is pain and suffering, the trick is to recognising the joy in-between'. We all have pain and suffering in our lives, knowing this is inevitable lets you recognise the joy in the rest of your time here.

Best of luck to you both, sorry to read it.

It's important that Mrs.C isn't actually "my wife". I just call her that because we're "married without the marriage".

The real difficulties come not with the cancer but with the choices made creating embryos.

Technically,we will be having children next month. Very odd, and very humbling to meet people trying for a family. Our shit is bad but, believe me, when you spend your days in cancer wards and treatment centres you are grateful for life's slightest grace.

I have a lifetime left to reflect, but I don't dwell on hypotheticals anymore.

There is no time to ruminate on "what ifs".

Edit. Agnostic, me. Very spiritual. Even more so now.

I love it when people show just how much they love those dearest to them. And OP you've done just that here.

Now keep showing Mrs C that love forever and ever.

Good luck!

Can offer you nothing but best wishes. Friends went through similar a few years ago, so far so good 4-5 years down the line health wise, but not talking things through with each other nearly destroyed their marriage.

Of all the crises to deal with as a couple, for gods sake keep talking openly and honestly

I know first hand how much of a strain on a relationship IVF can place.

My wife and I have been trying for five years now and have just buried our second baby girl. For the second time, we lost a baby at the 20 week mark and, after all the mood swings, needles, arguments, everything, we have nothing to show from it but a lot of grief. The only saving grace is that our two girls have shown what is wrong and, now we know that, we can hopefully make sure that number three goes to term.

Mr. C, I know that there's not a whole lot that some random person on a website can do to help, but make sure you give Mrs. C a huge hug and tell her you love her. It was about the only thing that I could really do to help my wife. Well, apart from cooking and cleaning.

Stay strong, both of you.

We always talk, And laugh. Love is a condition made up by people who want to feel the indescribable. "Love" doesn't cover how I feel for Mrs.C.

If you watch gogglebox, there's an old couple, not the poshos, who sit in Lazee Boy chairs and natter on. I'd like that.

It's a modern world with skewed values, five marriages between my mum and dad.

I'm the lucky one.

Best wishes and a great recovery to all affected by Cancer.

I know how you're feeling OP. MrsH was diagnosed 20th December, aged 38. We knew when the surgeon and nurse sit you down. Been a whirlwind since. Had a two week wait for MRI due to Christmas, but was told it was full mastectomy left side as 3 Grade 2 tumours present with total area over 5cm. MrsH has been very strong and positive, all the medical staff have commented. We're both scientists and are pragmatic about it, given we've two young children.

She opted for full reconstruction, so an 8 hour op. She's doing great now and has her second of her six cycles of chemo on Friday. Radio will follow too. We have our family and so although we were asked several times about further children, it was a straightforward decision for us. We're told she is now cancer-free and all the further treatments are to make sure it's gone.

The support is fabulous from all parts of the NHS, we have friends and colleagues who have been there too. It's hard, very hard and not something you expect to have to deal with. But she's young, fit and healthy and they've got it. All that points to a great recovery.

It focuses your minds on what's important in life and like you say when you see what some of the patients and their families are going through.

Breast Cancer Care put on weekend events for young women (<40) with the disease, all paid for. One in June I believe in Nottm. Early days for you both, but whatever might help you.

Be strong for her, she'll need it, and make sure you keep yourself fit and well, with some downtime. I'm knackered and it's difficult to keep going at full speed some days, making sure the family are OK and keeping up with work etc.

All the best for you both and your families.

Then there's the kick from the government regarding the fact that she's better off being unemployed than staying on SSP.

The money bits the angry bit. I'm on minimum wage and fortunately have a mum and dad bail out bank for things like this, how we would manage otherwise I can barely fathom.

Thanks to you all for kind words & wisdom.

All the best

Mrs. C is home after her first, hopefully only, operation today.

She is now recovering under my full fussy supervision.

FORWARDS

I've only just seen this; I must have genuinely sighed about half a dozen times reading through.

Not in a negative way, just humbling and yet positive.

Best wishes to you both.

[i]Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.[/i]

Calvin Coolidge

Word @ bullheart.

Her strength is now the standard by which every act is judged by me.

If anything gets me up those shingle slopes it'll be

"Well this is more fun than cancer.

Just 'texted' you about ride next week then saw this...
I will assume you will have your thirst on and we can visit the public house to deal with all this?

Oh yes. Mince up, smash down, beer in, coast home.

best of luck to you and mrs cfinnimore. We're going through our own cancer journey here that i'll not elaborate on but there are all sorts of things that will test you over the coming months.

Keep honest with each other, tell each other everything no matter how bad or self absorbed it might sometimes sound, generally it's no time for putting on a brave face. You might find that you're coping fantastically and then all of a sudden have a trigger that knocks you back, don't be afraid to confide in someone, that might be mrs cfinnimore or maybe someone else but if you feel the need then be sure to talk to someone. You're no good to your partner if your not in a good place yourself, you're gonna need a clear head.

It is a journey that you need to face together and one that you have a good chance of coming through but it's also easy to swamp your partner with too much attention. Give her room to breath when she needs it. I found this difficult once I realised just how little I could actually do to influence the only physical outcome that matters and spent my time trying to compensate for that by trying to do everything else.

Before you see the doctors write all your questions down, once you get in the consulting room all previous thoughts vanish. The more you know and understand the less you have to be anxious about.

Try and stay positive and I wish your partner all the best for a speedy and positive outcome.

my wife's niece went through the same thing a few years ago...breast cancer at the age of 30. she went through all the various drugs/treatments and suffered the side effects too. she eventually made the decision to have a double mastectomy.
things are now looking good for her...she has been told its now in remission and has even been told that she can now try for a baby.
OP - there can be light at the end of what seems to be a very long and dark tunnel. hold onto that hope and be strong for each other.
wishing your missus a speedy and successful recovery

Don't ever give cancer a capital letter - it isn't the most important thing in your lives. It is something that you have to face up to, deal with and get on with living. It is crappy, but it is not where your focus is - that has to be the horizon and adventures and life and living that are to come.

Beware of measuring yourself against her. I nearly broke myself by thinking 'if she can do that then I should be doing more'. It doesn't work like that. Just be you and try to keep things normal as much as possible.

Mr and Mrs C sending healing thoughts to you both you will beat this it just takes time!

Mrs R was diagnosed with cancer when she was pregnant with our second child. Two operations and chemo whilst pregnant meant she had to stop work and I had to drop hours at work. Good old government/tax man rules meant no help, we ended up getting some help from Macmillan who I can't thank enough!!

You both need to let all your thoughts and worries out and don't bottle them up. There are plenty of places and charities that can help, use them as they work and help.

Good luck and stay strong

Thanks for everyone's comments today. I will put my ducks in a row and write "a thing" but I'm cream crackered and have [s]CPS washers to fish out the hoover.[/s]distractions

Jen says thanks too. As far as being an all attentive carer, well, that is definitely in the honeymoon period.

I have a sore throat so will be making a sign reading "Yes, dear?"

Love, indeed...

All the very best to you and your family mate. A close friend is going through a similar thing and all the indications are that there is an excellent chance of a full recovery.

It's not cancer.

Pathology report came back. Very rare set of circumstances.

Jen is a one in a million case, consultant has never had a case like it.

Life, won. Cancer, nil.

Our thoughts and respect go out to everyone living with, without and through cancer.

Thank you.

We had a similar scare two years ago. Very frightening month for us so I know exactly what you've gone through.

It's not cancer.

Pathology report came back. Very rare set of circumstances.

Jen is a one in a million case, consultant has never had a case like it.

Life, won. Cancer, nil.

Our thoughts and respect go out to everyone living with, without and through cancer.

Thank you.

That is truly wonderful news.

Very lucky woman. Get her to buy a lottery ticket or something!

More seriously, I'm very glad it's not the alternative. Take care both of you.

Like

result

cfinnimore - Member

Life, won. Cancer, nil.

Good news indeed.

🙂

WINNING

*some famous quote about hope*

She doesn't need a scratchcard, I've just won the lottery.

Fort Bill Tickets bought now, holiday booked, bikes ready.

Sun's out you lot... Go find the world...

cfinnimore - Member

Hope from Meg Griffin.

great news - now go out and smash up some dusty trail (in a sensible manner, without endangering others, respect walkers and horse riders :D)

Great news, really happy for you.

That's the best thing I've heard on this most beautiful spring day.

Great news! Take stock and grasp life with both hands!

This morning I was lying in the Heather up the Pentlands watching a raptor thinking "life could change forever today"
Then I cycled down the hill hitting 45kph and it didn't matter.

Nothing really matters but happiness and love.

Great news?

Out of interest what is it, a benign Phyllodes tumor?

Fantastic news op.

Tom, we're waiting on the letter but phonetically that resembles what the consultant said.

**** knows. Considering some of what we've gone through, I think I'll just get on with it and propose.

Sunshine, hay and all that.

Seriously though, affirmation. I'm 27 next month. Big life.
Edit: These are not the ramblings of a relieved idiot, but those of a reliable fool. I'll be drunk later, tune in for that.