[Closed] By god, you are one ugly ****

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They'll do well in Cheshire

Though it was a Renault to begin with, 'Performance offroaders' 🙄

big, ugly, expensive, vulgar, branded.

they won't be able to make them fast enough.

As someone who has no interest in cars whatsoever, that looks just like a million and one other cars to me - and anyway, aren't all cars ugly??

I drove up behind one of those last week and I was actually sick*.

It's like they looked at the X6 and asked their designers to make something that looked even more unpleasant.

* This might not really be true.

In a world where this exists, that's a stunner.

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There's some unpleasant looking motors on the road these days for sure *

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* I've got one

Am I the only person in the world who thinks LR Evokes are gopping? Especially in white

Probably considering the sales success but I just find them so, so, .......oh I don't know, 'vulgar' perhaps describes the creases, surfacing details, the tiny rear window, the way the bonnet meets the wings, the gratuitous chrome.....

What is it?? Looks like cross between x6, megane and Vectra (or whatever they are called these days)

's ripping off a classic, innit?

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Thought it was a Renault to begin with

Is it not a Renault? Looks like a Renault badge?

Merc. I though

Don't even get me started on the F'in Evoke convertible... will be spending most of the summer dodging the f'in things being bazzed round the Cornish lanes 👿

Looks like an Opel badge to me. Merc?

Have you seen the new Mercedes i think c class. It looks like someone left the body mould too close to a heat source. It looks like the ends have melted and drooped. Even uglier than an x6 cayenne crossbreed

Am I the only person in the world who thinks LR Evokes are gopping?

Anyone who hasn't got long bleached blonde hair, and hasn't just eaten an overpriced salad at a Bistro in Wilmslow, before heading home to drink white wine, boff their personal trainer, then have a little cry, thinks they're gopping.

What are the chances of ever seeing one without a private plate that isn't some hopeless attempt to spell Shaz or Becky, maybe 5HAS 2 and B3CKY 4?

ermmmm.... what's wrong with the RR Evoque? or even the RR Evoque convertible?

Don't forget the very first Series Land Rovers were soft tops....

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http://www2.mercedes-benz.co.uk/content/unitedkingdom/mpc/mpc_unitedkingdom_website/en/home_mpc/passengercars/home/new_cars/models/gle-class/gle_coupe.html

GLE 'coupe'

Its a Mercedes GLE coupe.

I had to look it up though

It looks OK but I'd never buy one

Merc drivers = living dead

It's blander than a bland thing.

The GLA is a daft machine too.

All of these type of cars are fugly.

From the company which bought you:

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Okay now forget all that, here's the one we're going to sell a metric shit-tonne of...
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We call it the Bloboshitti

All those fat off-road coupe things are for 'immerging' markets really. They'll take money off any fool in the West who wants one, but they were designed with other tastes in mind.

Have you seen the new Aston? It's all over the papers here in Wales because they're going to build them in St. Athan, but not many can bring themselves to call it 'good looking'.

3 metric shitonnes, shirley?

Build quality of the maseratis I've seen have been shocking, friend of friends couple literally dissembled itself in quick order, engine was amazing though.

JAG the Series I has a utilitarian style and is a well balanced functional form.

In my opinion, the Evoke is very much style over substance. A very well known car designer once told me that you can always tell whether a car has a balanced form by looking at a white one as it shows up any flaws in it's basic shape.

Not having seen one in the metal, it is difficult to tell if an Evoke soft-top will be any better looking to my eyes than the 'normal' one. I am not holding my breath.

I am aware that I may not have the same sensibilities as many folk as I like the first of the late 1990's series Fiat Multipla's

Don't forget the reception the FORD SEIRRA first got after replaceing the Cortina

retro83 - Member
We call it the Bloboshitti

😛

There's some unpleasant looking motors on the road these days for sure

Lady Gresley - Member
aren't all cars ugly??

definitely not

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Am I the only person in the world who thinks LR Evokes are gopping? Especially in white

No I'm with you especially from behind. Apparently they are selling like hot cakes so

big, ugly, expensive, vulgar, branded.

they won't be able to make them fast enough.

Seems to be about right 🙂

Merc GLE in the first pic is nice in real life, no really it is quite nice. Ok so I've only seen one in Grey and AMG flava' but it was nice enough. Would'nt buy one but prices are reasonable C£50k for the AMG one. Space inthe rears a bit rubbish but you'd expect that.

Other vehicles to consider in this Group are the Audi Q3 & Q5 and both are just plain Yuk. Also BMW do an X4 now to compliment the X6 that started this craze off..

I don't see the point of these vehicles, but then I'm not target market am I. They're aimed at folks who just want to wear a Rugged Well Made Coat but not too rugged that they look like they like the outdoors..

They'll be popular here in Shiney Town I expect.

Merc GLE in the first pic is nice in real life, no really it is quite nice. Ok so I've only seen one in Grey and AMG flava' but it was nice enough.

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😆

All cars are essentially phallic symbols, one way or another. I am thinking about one of the new right hand drive Mustangs (red of course, V8) but will be driving around to constant chorus of phnarr-phnarring and slagging from everybody I know. So might not bother.

Although on the other hand, the V8 will drown it out, so maybe will keep it on the table.

[i]Anyone who hasn't got long bleached blonde hair, and hasn't just eaten an overpriced salad at a Bistro in Wilmslow, before heading home to drink white wine, boff their personal trainer, then have a little cry, thinks they're gopping.[/i]

😆

Hels - just get one! A car that shouts [b]**** OFF!!![/b] at everyone. I'm also absolutely loving the new Ford adverts which seemed to be aimed at doing the same. And believe me, I never thought I'd say I actually liked a car advert, as they're normally absolutely bloody awful. Love the bold graphics and colours they're using!

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I just don't get these cars. Can't comprehend why someone would walk into a showroom and order one of these (or one of the many other faceless crossover 4x4 coupes)?

Expensive, heavy, ugly, very impractical (compared to an estate or proper 4x4), not sporty (compared to a proper sports Coupe)?

Where's the plus points? I don't get it, I really just can't get my head around it?

OP's pic looks like the back of a Renualt Laguna Coupe

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I think Merc have pretty much given up on Europe it's all about the Middle East and Asia now.

The new Mercedes GLC looks VERY nice in the metal.

Regrettably I have to agree with that.

Different models of Mustang never disappoint - that's car that looks like it would drink all your beer and get your daughter pregnant.

What are the odds of seeing one in a Matt Wrap in the next couple of weeks?

We should see/take a poll as to who sees one first and what colour/wrap it has, and how it's been parked?

Beautifully put globalti! 😆

It definitely looks like the kind of car that would start a fight in a kebab shop at 2am

It is amusing me that the new Merc performance SUV off roader **** mobile is being mistaken for a Renault.

I haven't felt that ill since seeing a Ssangyong Rodius one day by accident

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loddrik - Member
Regrettably I have to agree with that.

It's a handsome old Hector isn't it? If it came with something other than a diseasel, I'd be interested...not in buying new obviously (£40k!) but waiting for them second hand? ...Sure.

dragon - Member
I think Merc have pretty much given up on Europe it's all about the Middle East and Asia now.

I think you have a very good point there.. These cars are really designed around those expectations. If you look at SSanyong and Hyundai for example, in the past some of their design cues have come from Europe, now it seems the design cues are coming from Asia..
😐

And I don't think the GLC is nice at all.. It's like a shrunk GL without the boldness..

hels - Member

All cars are essentially phallic symbols, one way or another

Can you explain this further? I don't get it.....

Are these phallic symbols, one way or another?

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stumpy01 - Member

Are these phallic symbols, one way or another?

Ah yes, the Fiat Chode

The new Mercedes GLC looks VERY nice in the metal.

onewheelgood - Member

The OP's picture was of the coupé version, which really is comparable to the Ssangyong up there when it comes to looks.

I honestly thought it was a new SsangYong until someone mentioned it was a Merc. The pic in the OP even makes the logo look a bit like the SsangYong logo.

I quite like the new Jeep that some of the drivers are bezzing around in at F1 testing.

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[b]AAAAAAAAAARGGGHHHH - MY EYES!!!!! [/b]

Sweet baby Jesus and the orphans! Thats absolutely hideous!!! It looks like its been drawn, badly, by a 6 year old 😯

stumpy01

saw one of those Minis a few days ago....

Bleeeeeuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhh 👿

Expensive, heavy, ugly, very impractical (compared to an estate or proper 4x4), not sporty (compared to a proper sports Coupe)?

Where's the plus points? I don't get it, I really just can't get my head around it?

Yep I'm utterly baffled by it too.

Saw one of these the other day

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Take a mini, make it fast. Now make it it tall and heavy, chop the roof line and delete some doors to pretend its a coupe while still being tall and heavy. Fit stiffer springs so it doesn't roll like a ferry in force 10 and ruin the ride. Stick some stripes on it and sell it!

Utter marketing guff

You wouldn't believe how many pre-orders we have for the convertible Evoque.
Actually you probably would.
Big Bob's pet project hits another sweet spot.

I just don't get these cars. Can't comprehend why someone would walk into a showroom and order one of these (or one of the many other faceless crossover 4x4 coupes)? Expensive, heavy, ugly, very impractical (compared to an estate or proper 4x4), not sporty (compared to a proper sports Coupe)?

well, 4x4's suggest that one is rufty-tufty, the fact that they're no good off road is entirely irrelevant, as they will Never be used off road in any real sense of the word, in fact may even be a plus, no hard gearbox shenanigans to learn, or fix when it goes wrong. The Coupe thing is the same, 'most' of the looks, without the insurance costs or difficult driving characteristics. The fact that they are impractical is also not a problem, most folk need it to carry the weekly shop, and the occasional visit to B&Q to buy a Weber and bedding flowers.

the owners of these vehicles want others to think they go on adventures at the weekend, and are therefore interesting and exciting!

A bit like a 4 wheeled North Face jacket? 🙂

I almost feel sorry for those who design cars - either they're so designed by committee, that they end up incredible bland.

Or there's not a single good car designer in the world these days.

I cannot remember the last time I saw a modern car that I thought - wow.

i'm told by someone working on the new one that it's worse
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A bit like a 4 wheeled North Face jacket?

precisely 😆

I would love to see a geographic b'down of evoque sales.

My guess would be Cheshire, Midlands and various London boroughs dominate.

Not a fan, although the new Disco sport passed me at the weekend and that looked ok and its not that different IMO.

onewheelgood - Member

It really doesn't - it looks as pretentious and absurd as any SUV.
The OP's picture was of the coupé version, which really is comparable to the Ssangyong up there when it comes to looks.

Have you actually seen one, I mean for real? They don't look at all like an SUV, they actually look much more like an Audi Allroad - just a large, slightly higher off the ground estate car. Hence why I like it.

Not a fan, although the new Disco sport passed me at the weekend and that looked ok and its not that different IMO.

The concern I have with these gawd awful things is that as they get higher are they going to ride up over normal car bonnets in a crash? Really don't want to be T boned by one as I fear they'll hit the window rather than the door.

It's like the four wheel equivalent of really painful flatulence.

I'll see your GLE coupe and raise you a BMW 2 series 7 seat:

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😯

I dunno - don't really see a problem with that 2-series thing. I'm surprised BMW have taken so long to get into the MPV market. That to me is no better or worse than an S-Max, Galaxy, Sharan, Espace etc etc. It probably drives better than most of them as well.

It is amusing me that the new Merc performance SUV off roader **** mobile is being mistaken for a Renault.

I haven't felt that ill since seeing a Ssangyong Rodius one day by accident

I saw one of these the other day and I was nearly sick, how that ever made it off the drawing board God only knows!

[quote=binners ]A bit like a 4 wheeled North Face jacket?

Not exactly - because it's possible to use a TNF jacket on a real adventure.

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jools182 - Member

Lady Gresley - Member
aren't all cars ugly??

definitely not

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lol, that thing being posted as an example of a beautiful car... here it is in green:

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