[Closed] Autism and Blue Badges.

Hold on just getting comfortable.

Right you may begin.

[i] I know little about Autism[/i]

go away and find out some more and then post a thread questioning what life impact it has on people.

[edit] question mark removed to make it a statement.

Seriously?

It's not just about physical impairment...

What about a child that finds busy shops extremely overstimulating so being able to get in and out quicker makes things much easier? Or just the safety aspect of not having to walk very far with them through a busy carpark

lol

[i]after having open heart surgery for some unknown reason.[/i]

Maybe he should have asked what the reason was before he had the surgery?

Disabled spaces aren't used enough imo - and any disability is still a disability.

If it helps even a tiny bit with the struggle people with autistic children/dependants face on a daily basis, then I’m all for it.

Badges should be rainbow coloured.

It is a spectrum after all.

My only experiences of "autistic" people are some feral brats whose parents deem it OK to steal because they are "autistic".

[i]My only experiences of "autistic" people are some feral brats whose parents deem it OK to steal because they are "autistic"[/i]

the can I repeat my suggestion that you **** off and find out what autism means for some people?

I have an Autistic son (and a daughter with Tourette's /adhd) shopping or going anywhere with them is extremely stressful and just plain hard work.

We don't have a blue badge as he is at the bottom end of the spectrum but I can fully understand people getting blue badges for children higher up the spectrum.

zippykona - Member
My only experiences of "autistic" people are some feral brats whose parents deem it OK to steal because they are "autistic".

So you know nothing about it in other words.

My only experiences of "autistic" people are some feral brats whose parents deem it OK to steal because they are "autistic".

stay classy

I've never seen a car park with all the disabled spaces taken.

Perhaps we should concentrate on the (generally) BMW driving sales reps parking in disabled or parent-and-child spaces...

My only experiences of "autistic" people are some feral brats whose parents deem it OK to steal because they are "autistic".

Then that is a parenting issue, not an autism issue.

A good friend and colleague has a badly autistic son, and having seen the struggles she has gone through, a 2 year fight to get him into a school that can help him, leaving in floods of tears often because the school he is currently in cannot cope and she is at the end of her tether and many other issues, if a barley used parking space helps her then i do not begrudge her it at all.

is this going to be one of 'those' threads where the OP asks what they thought was a clever conversation starter only to be shamed at their naivety/trolling skills/lack of awareness.

hope so.

My mum has just received her Blue Badge.... shitty eyesight brought on from chemo.

I had the good fortune / misfortune to spend the day on Saturday with a friend of a friend (family treasure hunt) and his Asperger's son.

Fortune because I think I have just a tiny bit more understanding what having an Aspie / ASD child is like and the difficulties it creates.

Misfortune* because I was absolutely exhausted by the effort involved in managing around those difficulties.

* don't flame me, I'm not saying that i didn't enjoy their company or that i wouldn't spend time with them again, absolutely the opposite it was a pleasure a lot of the time. Just making the point that even without being the adult caring for him, it was still hard work. So any way we can assist in that makes sense to me.

Following a serious motorbike accident three years ago, I’ve been left with a permanent disability. I’m also the proud dad of a little lad with learning difficulties and autism. I don’t have a blue badge, and have never considered applying for one. It’s difficult at times to deal with this, but you just have to cope (my own opinion, of course), and accusations of lazyness really don’t help. Every autistic child is different, as everyone with a disability is different, and we all cope with our situations in our own way.

Perhaps we should concentrate on the (generally) BMW driving sales reps parking in disabled or parent-and-child spaces...

Don't use the disabled spaces, but with parents and children ones I find the people using them that shouldn't are almost exclusively middle aged grandparents with no kids with them that think they are allowed to park there because they have "grandson on board" sign in the back window of their zafira

Smudge.No , feel free to enlighten me.
I still think the spaces should be for people who have reduced mobility.
Have just watched the video. My friend has Aspergers and in no way needs a badge but no doubt he could apply for one.
I feel really strongly on this as we have a fit able bodied person who has a blue badge taking up the disabled bay while I have to help our less mobile customers back to their cars if they need it.
I don't begrudge helping them,I do begrudge people taking the piss.
When I tried to dob the abuser in I was told he might have a badge as he might be blind. He is the **** driving.

Smudger666 - Member
is this going to be one of 'those' threads where the OP asks what they thought was a clever conversation starter only to be shamed at their naivety/trolling skills/lack of awareness.

To all those that don't think autism is disabling, just spend some time with a family with an autistic child then come back here to report your findings and new-found respect for all those families having to deal with it on a day to day basis.

My experience is that of my girls' best friend being autistic. She is a bit of a Forrest Gump child - she sees n opportunity to run and she does - she's been lost several times and it can be very scary for all involved. Having access to disabled spaces will greatly help her parents as they will have more room to 'manage' her and her little sister as they get out of the car in a less confined space (which is one of her triggers).

I welcome the idea whole-heartedly.

My mum has just received her Blue Badge.... shitty eyesight brought on from chemo.

Sorry to hear that :(. But honest question, wouldn't that mean no longer driving?

[i]But honest question, wouldn't that mean no longer driving? [/i]

You know that lots of people who can't drive due to having a disability arrive at car parks being driven by someone else, don;t you?

zippykona - Member

Smudge.No , feel free to enlighten me.
I still think the spaces should be for people who have reduced mobility.

fortunately the authorities disagree with you. there are many types of disability some visible and some not.

So I don't get involved with blue badges any more (it's the local council that assess and issue).
TBH, I'd not really thought about mental dissability and blue badges (probably because I don't think about them full stop, nowadays).

I wonder IF my local council would grant one based on the mental stress parking could place? I'm aware they asses "time to walk 20 yards" or somethinglike that, but not for any other 'non physical parameters'. Hmm... Goes off to have a look!

DrP

[quote="morphio"]wouldn't that mean no longer driving?Blue badges aren't just for the drivers, they are for those being carried in the vehicle, might be the driver, might be a passenger.

[quote="zippykona"]I still think the spaces should be for people who have reduced mobility.You try dealing with an autistic teenager having a full on melt down. Reduced mobility is only half of it.

"Is every lazy parent now going to have an autistic child just to get a badge?"

You do understand you dont pick to be pregnant with an autistic child? Yes, you could chose not to have it, but, are you such a cynic that someone would chose to go through this just to get trouble-free parking?

You Sir, are in need of education. I'll hasten to add that not everyone with an autistic child deem it necessary to have/use said badge - think on.

My friend has Aspergers and in no way needs a badge but no doubt he could apply for one.

Well there is some doubt, just like not every heart condition warrants a blue badge.

My dad and my FiL have both had open-heart surgery and neither would dream of asking for a blue badge.

So your dad must be a bit of a chancer, eh?

No, could barely walk .

I wonder if Fife still has the most adhd as they were the highest in the league for giving out ritalin. I believe some was sold on to adults as a poor mans coke
Lots of genuine cases but i bet a few dodgy parents too

No, could barely walk .

So you mean I was wrong to jump to an ill-informed and offensive judgement about him?

My eyes have been opened as to who is eligible for a badge.
My previous notion that it was only for the less mobile has been dispelled.
Having been exposed to some of the worst malingerers in society I'm just very aware that this new ruling will be open to abuse by those who know how to abuse the system.

My only experiences of "autistic" people are some feral brats whose parents deem it OK to steal because they are "autistic".

You're right on one point, you have no experience........****

Having been exposed to some of the worst malingerers in society I'm just very aware that this new ruling will be open to abuse by those who know how to abuse the system.

No, your prejudice is the only thing that is making you ‘aware’.

Zippy, you start some great threads but this isn't one of them mate. 🙁

A good friend has a grandson with severe autism.

Even a "simple" trip to get him clothing is a military operation.

I thought I knew a little about autism until I went out one day with the lad and his Nan.

It was an eye opener I can tell you.

If a blue badge makes it just 1% easier for this boy and his mum/Nan to get around then I'm all for it.

Having been exposed to some of the worst malingerers in society I'm just very aware that this new ruling will be open to abuse by those who know how to abuse the system.

That post is below you zippy.

"Is every lazy parent now going to have an autistic child just to get a badge?"

Speaking from experience, you don't just go to the doctors and say "oh, my child's autistic", can I get a badge please.

Its a long drawn out fight to even get a diagnosis, let alone anything else from the "system".
My 4 year old does not necessarily present as being autistic, in fact some of the people we have come across in early education have queried the diagnosis, but those in the know, the professionals,(and us) know.
Who knows how he is going to develop in the future, at 4 he is fairly easy to control, but as he grows it may / may not be so easy.
So yeah, I can see why blue badges can be given out. A lot of people with autism don't recognise the danger presented by busy roads etc, so minimising the distance they have to walk minimises the danger.

Even getting a blue badge is not that easy for those that do need it, my uncle served 16 years in the Paras, two weeks after he left he broke his back simply by twisting it so badly putting his foot down a hole on a football referees course, after numerous surgeries, he can walk less than 100 yds and we still had a fight to get a badge for him, even though he drives an adapted car.

I still think the spaces should be for people who have reduced mobility.

They are. Just not exclusively.

I feel really strongly on this as we have a fit able bodied person who has a blue badge taking up the disabled bay

Who are you to judge just by looking at someone? [url= https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/ ]A fit and able-bodied person, yesterday[/url].

You may well have "strong feelings" but by your own admission they're from a point of ignorance. If I were to give you one piece of advice it'd be to stop digging and start listening to what others are saying.

@zippykona
I would like to tell you about my Saturday experience to give you a taste of what daily life is like. If it helps open you tiny mind in the smallest way possible it will be worth it.

So, Saturday was my brother in laws wedding day. My autistic son Billy (not his real name) who is 15 years old was really excited about the day. He loves weddings and parties. The day started with us trying to find him something to wear. He really wanted to wear a suit (despite not owning one). He point blank refused to try anything else on because in his mind you only wear a suit to a wedding. Like I say this process took a whole hour, while we were also trying to get ready ourselves and get our other three children ready and out the door at the same time. Eventually I found a pair of my own smart trousers and a shirt/tie that he would put on.

When we arrived at the venue the car parking area was a grass field that was particularly muddy given the recent rain. It took another fifteen minutes to try and get Billy out of the car. He didn't want to get mud on his shoes.

The third meltdown came when he couldn't choose his own seat at the wedding breakfast. He wanted to sit by his favourite Grandad and could not get his head around why he couldn't swap seats.

Further meltdowns came at home time (he refused to leave).

This is a regular day (and a pretty good one in comparison to what it can be like). It is draining, mentally, physically and emotionally to deal with autism every single day.

If a blue badge helps and makes day to day life just a little easier for those parents dealing with Autism then I`m all for it.

On a more serious note - are we sure it's intended for parents of autistic kids to be able to get blue badges?

I'd assumed it was for autistic driving licence holders.

I'm just very aware that this new ruling will be open to abuse by those who know how to abuse the system.

No, you aren't, you've just made that up in order to be outraged.

Try talking to someone who's seen the application process first hand. Like me, for instance. The entire process is stacked to make you fail, it's very, very difficult to get a PIP award let alone a blue badge. It's a ****ing disgrace frankly, and if a couple of chancers slipping through the system means that someone who genuinely needs help gets it then I'm happy to take that hit.

On a more serious note - are we sure it's intended for parents of autistic kids to be able to get blue badges?

A person is rewarded it they don’t have to be drivers.

That all sounds very familiar Trailwagger. Getting out the house is always 3/4s of the battle for us!

A person is rewarded it they don’t have to drivers.

Come again? Is there some autocorrect going on here?

No, dyslexia.

I'm not being sarcastic Drac, I'm not sure what your comment means.

The blue badge is for the individual, that individual does not need to drive.

chakaping - a blue badge is awarded to an individual who is deemed to meet the criteria for a blue badge. They do not need to be able to drive a vehicle to be given a badge.

If people thought about this for a few minutes they'd realise that a lot of people (but not all) who need to use disabled spaces to give good access to vehicles and to make getting to shops etc more accessible to them will be unable to drive because of the conditions they suffer from (which is what qualifies them for a badge in the first place) or their age.

Gotcha, thanks for elaborating.

Well I don't think we'll need to apply for one, so Zippy may be reassured that at least one family with an autistic kid won't be milking it.

Zippykona, people with autism often lack empathy and sympathy for others..............

have you thought about seeing a doctor, who knows , you might get a blue badge 🙄 😀

siwhite - Member

I've never seen a car park with all the disabled spaces taken.

Can I move where you live?
My wife is disabled (paraplegic) so we need to use the wider spaces to get here wheelchair down the side of the car and open the door wide enough.

Quite a few places we go we struggle to find a space. Coupled with the fact that some people who park in them clearly think that the hatchings form part of the space and just park anywhere on them rendering the extra width on one side redundant.

I do think that the blue badge system needs and overhaul - perhaps different colour badges for different spaces? We only need a wide space - doesn't necessarily have to be right outside the door to the store.

Can't really comment on the ADHD/Autism/Aspergers other than that I have a cousin with ADHD and friends who have a child with Aspergers - having witnessed meltdowns by both I can sympathise with those who have to deal with this on a daily basis.

My mum has just received her Blue Badge.... shitty eyesight brought on from chemo.

My mam has just got one too; chemo has caused nerve damage in her hands and feet so she really struggles to walk (coupled with the general damage caused by being on chemo for for 50% of the last three years). She waited far too long to apply for one.

dirkpitt74 - Member

Can I move where you live?
My wife is disabled (paraplegic) so we need to use the wider spaces to get here wheelchair down the side of the car and open the door wide enough.

Quite a few places we go we struggle to find a space.

We should convert all parent and child spaces to disabled spaces.
That way, people like you and your good lady wife would be able to park conveniently and at the same we'll remove some of the misplaced sense of entitlement that most parents seem to have whilst encouraging them to walk a little further and not turn into such fat little ****ers.
Win-win! 😀

zippykona - Member
My father in law was denied one after having open heart surgery for some unknown reason.

I vaguely think it's unlikely that you will get a blue badge for a temporary condition. A while back a friend was severely injured after a car knocked him off his motorbike but a blue badge wasn't available for the sort of recoverable injuries he had.

I have taught more than a few autistic kids over the years and I can see some virtues for the very severe . However I see why people object. But equally I object to some use of normal badges. In many places parking is banned for quite sensible reason eg sharp bend, busy town, narrow streets, lots of traffic. It bemuses me and proves the stupidity of the system when the only people able to park there are those less able to deal with the hazards. Often infirm or elderly and not very fast thinking. A well meant but badly thought through system. As to child parking spaces, well, if its private land then its up to the owner but I personally would like to see the spaces given to the elderly instead who whilst not able to get a blue badge still struggle to walk across a large car park with loaded bags. If parents cannot keep their kids under control the little gits should be left at home. No different to dogs.

As Shob says.

If parents cannot keep their kids under control the little gits should be left at home.

That’s not the reason they are there.

As to child parking spaces

But I do think there should be more clarity on when a parent/child space should stop being used. Is it when they are out of stage 1 car seats? Stage 2? Stage 3?

johndoh - Member

Ever tried getting a baby out of the back of a car in a standard space? Especially now cars are so damn big.

Buy a smaller car, or walk.

And how many people would be complaining at having their cars dinged by children opening doors in tight spots?

If the child is unable to successfully operate a door, it either needs better education or better supervision.
Or you could try walking.

Buy a smaller car

If the child is unable to successfully operate a door, it either needs better education or better supervision.

It's all cars, not just ones with children in them.

This makes no sense.

Or use the parent and child spaces to minimise the risk.

Walking minimises the risk.

This makes no sense.

Walking minimises the risk.

Stop biting Johndoh he’s not that good of a troll.

You're right. 🙂

I have very disabled son, PMLD with complex medical. He’s that poorly that blue badges, statments, special schools, etc where unfortunately very easy for us to get.

At the school he goes to there are also a lot of children on the spectrum, the more severe end, but by no means as tough as it can get.

When I speak to their parents and see how they have to live, I have nothing but admiration for what they cope with every day. Blue badges to them all I say and if the spaces are full, I’ll wait... unless you don’t have a badge in which case I’ll park behind you

This was being discussed on the radio when I went out at lunchtime. The short section I heard consisted of disabled badge holders calling in to say "my disability is more deserving than your disability" 😯

Yes it does - try thinking about it.

Ah, I see.
You're evading my

Buy a smaller car

misplaced sense of entitlement

In that context it does make sense.

Off to the shops now.
Think I'll take the bus. 🙂

[i]When I speak to their parents and see how they have to live, I have nothing but admiration for what they cope with every day. Blue badges to them all I say ...[/i]

This for me too.

I think people tend to see autism as 'has a bit of trouble relating to other people', 'can't cope in crowds'. Which is true for some people but there is also a group that are profoundly and comepletely unable to deal with interacting with the world to any significant degree.

People see drama's on the telly like that one recently with the autistic kid in and think 'why would he need a blue badge' but that's not the reality for a lot of children (and adults) or their carers.

I'd go as far as to say that actually as johnikgriff says that people who need a larger space for vehicle access are probably less 'deserving' of a parking space next to a shop (or wherever) than the carer of a significantly autistic child/teenager/adult that they can't leave at home alone but for whom a walk across a car park is a cognitive and experiential nightmare.

Think I'll take the bus.

Drac - Moderator

Stop biting Johndoh he’s not that good of a troll.

"Having a difference of opinion does not a troll make"
said sbob to the most antagonistic and disagreeable of mods.

[i]"Having a difference of opinion does not a troll make[/i]"

but perhaps continuing to take digs when it's clear the difference exists and will not be resolved does?

johndoh - Member

Don't forget the four kids

I don't have four kids as I am not horrifically selfish (or the father of quadruplets).

I wouldn't mind if the wider spaces were the other side of the car park and not outside the door - but that's not the same for every one.
My wife is paraplegic but also fairly fit and can get her self around town no problem - she walks our 7y/o daughter the 1.5 mile to school most mornings and isn't averse to the odd 13 mile hand cycle around lake Vyrnwy.

The problem is you can't cater for everyone - which is why perhaps a graded system would be better - but lets face it that would be non starter due to admin and assessing everyone.

wwaswas - Member

but perhaps continuing to take digs when it's clear the difference exists and will not be resolved does?

You should [b]definitely[/b] stay out of the EU thread. 😆

I'll admit that people who don't take responsibility for themselves are a pet hate.

You choose to have kids.
You don't choose for them to have disabilities.