[Closed] Are you a terrorist?

I hope not.  Even if I was I probably wouldn't know as they are very secretive organisations....  (thank you Dave Hedgehog)

I believe it was Noel Coward who wrote 'sole purpose of visit' in response to the question, 'do you intend to conspire to overthrow the United States government?' on his immigration form.

They don't find it very funny when you turn up at border controls though...

"They looked up my Esta number and said ‘you’re a terrorist’. I told them that I was 70 years old and I don’t even recognise what that means."

Really?

Due to an error with my bank I turned up in New York with £30k in travellers cheques. The error being they assumed I was going there for a few months so most of the cheques were for $20 and a few $50. I was there for a fortnight and buying camera gear from B+H. A very long session of talking to immigration occurred.

ah, the terrorist double bluff though. I mean, of course they're going to tick no, so you only need to focus your resources on people that say they aren't.

Makes you think......

"I don't know why that question is on the form in the first place"

This is why:

https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/18/1546#

This is why:

https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/18/1546#

& in English?

makes it easier to imprison someone for lying, as opposed to proving they were planning / guilty of the terrorism / drug trafficking, etc.

Bad news for the scottish bombmaker (sorry - HOLIDAYmaker) is that he's technically guilty of that offence (ignorance is not a defence) so even if they subsequently allow him to travel he could still be banged up in Sing Sing for 10 years.

I once got pulled aside for further bag checks due to a strange object on the scanner.

They looked worried when I said I packed it myself and  could not offer an explenation as to what they were seeing/describing.

Open the bag and it was a pack of waffles stuck to a granola bar and my phone was resting on top.

To be fair it did look like some kind of weird device when they pulled up the image for me to see.

I got a song bout this

I think the old Official Secrets Act form many years i go i signed whilst in the Army, had questions along the lines of:

- Have you ever been convicted of a crime?

- Have you ever been convicted of an act of terrorism?

- Have you ever been convicted of an act of genocide?

Tempted to reply i was buy the meat count in tesco and before you knew it i'd wiped out 20,000 people, but didn't think they'd see the funny side... makes you wonder who was going to tick the genocide box and still expect to get the job?

makes you wonder who was going to tick the genocide box and still expect to get the job?

Isn't that how they filter for parachute regiment suitability.

Hasn’t this story been done at least once before - I seem to remember it was some old duffer then as well.  Not sure exactly what the point of the story is - what is he expecting to happen by going to the press about it???!!!

I have no wish to visit USA ...

What is there to see that I haven't seen?

There's always one silly old fart every year that does this isn't there?

There’s always one silly old fart every year that does this isn’t there?

I'd bet there's more, but most would be to embarrassed about their stupidity to go to the press 😳😳

What is there to see that I haven’t seen?

Who knows..

The red dirt of utah is fairly unique the mountains can be spectacular and much more.

Bigger worry is still the homeland security right to confescate and copy electronic devices and the questions about social media, that is also before you get to the racial profiling at immigration.

The red dirt of utah is fairly unique the mountains can be spectacular and much more.

Seen that in Spain ... 😀

I'm glad this story is illustrated with a photo of someone looking sad holding a passport, as I wouldn't have been able to understand story without it.

Apiln.blogspot.com

“One of the questions ask if you are a terrorist and it must have jumped from No to Yes without me knowing," he said

That's what all the terrorists say. ..

I always write “no (freedom fighter)” this confuses Americans because of the usage of the word freedom. They ****ing love that word.

what is he expecting to happen by going to the press about it???!!!

Maybe he got a few quid off the paper for his story to help with the money he will have lost on his holiday.

The red dirt of utah is fairly unique the mountains can be spectacular and much more.

Seen that in Spain …

F*** me, your eyes must be good if you can see Utah from Spain.

makes it easier to imprison someone for lying

I think it is more to make it easier to deport them. Since they broke the conditions for entering the country. The imprisoning is dealt with under the terrorist activities.

Plus you might catch a really stupid bomber or just a really stupid person. So  no real downside.

Also "I told them that I was 70 years old and  don’t even recognise what that means.". Really? Managed to ignore the years of the troubles and then the current lot?

Managed to ignore the years of the troubles and then the current lot?

Selective gammon

It was always the Moral Turpitude box where I wanted to tick no and write but I live in hope.

No

Maybe they thought it said "are you a tourist?"

I have no wish to visit USA …

What is there to see that I haven’t seen?

You tell us, North America is a continent, it’s sodding huge, with a vast variety of terrain and geography. I’m willing to bet that you haven’t seen, in person, more than a tiny percentage of what there is to see, quite apart from what’s in the cities.

And I don’t count what you might have seen on telly - that’s not the same as going there.

Maybe they thought it said “are you a tourist?”

Easy mistake to make, that...

@debz

T.E.R.R.O.R-IST.......

BANGER!

Never best to joke about this stuff since TSA have almost zero humour - although one tell me a joke a few months ago - so bizarre i didn’t know whether to laugh or not.

There are many things I would like to see in the states, but I won't be visiting the country in the current climate (and it has been going wrong for much longer than the Trump years)

What sort of idiot books their flights before getting their visa sorted first?
(I haven't travelled overseas for a long time, so could have this completely wrong)

Well ESTA is only required when you go to check in so the guy in the story probably did this the day before travel. He’d then be automatically barred with his mistake and probably have to go to the US embassy to try and stort it - hence missing his flight.

incidentally for those of you who wouldnt go to the US, you are missing out. A great country to visit and lots to see (am from the jet lag it’s 4am here in Houston ☹️).

Most Americans can’t beleive how stupid Brexit is BTW!

What sort of idiot books their flights before getting their visa sorted first?

I'm sure for most visas you need to have your flight details to complete the application. Sure this was the case when I last went to the states.

What is there to see that I haven’t seen?

Waffles and granola bars afaik. I think there's something called Oreos too.

incidentally for those of you who wouldnt go to the US, you are missing out.

Thanks for the heads up. I've updated my list and added the USA in the light of this information.

What is there to see that I haven’t seen?

Millions of great people, living in amazing landscapes and brilliant cities.

Think about how your own country looks from the outside? If you viewed it only through the actions of its politicans and media motor mouths, you'd never give it a try…

...so anyway, dunno if they still have it, but at the airport on everyone's lips (Leeds And Bradford International Airport - I will repeat this acronym joke until someone laughs) there's a sign at check in which says "Remarks intended in humour will be taken seriously." Bit like this forum really.

I spent 3 months touring the Divide route (with a lot of detours) last year. I loved the small towns, they all seem to have a brewery. The scenery varies enormously, mountains, deserts, forests with bears (yes I did meet one), coyotes, moose and shit load of smaller stuff you don't see here. I added Arizona onto the end of the trip, the Grand Canyon is worth the journey on it own. The bits of Route 66 I saw from the falling down derelict bits in New Mexico to the regenerated stuff in Arizona is something I'd like to see more of. I'd like to ride more of the deserts in the western states (I've got that trip planned for 2020). The people are brilliant, they're interested in what you're doing and make the time to chat, much more than you'd get from anyone in this country.

I think the Question should be ? Do you believe in Flat Earth ? yes or no Clearly a nutter if you tick yes.