[Closed] Am I in danger of writing an 'accessible' song?

clearly not hah!

I liked that.

You sounded like you were getting bored as the song went on.

To be honest, and this is meant as constructive criticism, cos I couldn't do anything like that, it struck me that your voice is not carrying it off, it's a bit too bland.
Would be interesting to hear it sung by a woman, or by a proper old grizzled Tom Waitsish singer, or you when you'd just got up and had a fag.

I would second Drac, you just don't sound very interested or passionate in the song.

I listened to others you have uploaded too, kinda got the same impression. I really don't want to sound rude but I would advocate vocal lessons as it sounds like you have an untrained voice to me. Defo not a bad start though and I can hear potential.

You won't believe this, but the donkey just started braying outside the window here, along with that track. Sounded good together 🙂

So a donkey on the backing track and 20 Rothmans? It's easy this music production lark innit?

alex, more depressing than nick cave............ 😉

What Drac and Moonhead said, passion. Either full on Tom Waits or sing higher and realy belt it out.

So a donkey on the backing track and 20 Rothmans? It's easy this music production lark innit?

I know what I'll do tomorrow, newsagents & then straight down the paddock, I'll take my lighter, my guitar and tape recorder.

Do people still use tape recorders ?

Okay listen to them all now
"Thisiswhatyourf*ckingworldhasdonetome" is growing on me as is "so what" and "go to sleep"

"So what" sounds almost up beat- I needed a lift thanks
- music I can skip to -

I'd agree with the above comment about your voice loosing interest in 'broken fall" - could you sing it in another (higher) key ?

You played an acoustic number at the original Single Track Southern Festival in my living room. Are you coming to the BBB for an encore?

it sounds like you have an untrained voice to me

I found it strangely interesting, moving in one or two places and downright painful in most of the others. I've listened to it a few times now and it sounds to me like you were either trying far too hard or very stoned.

I liked it. I was almost certainly unjustifiably too happy when I clicked on your link, within no time at all the sound of your voice had brought me down a notch or two, as the stark reality that life isn't exactly a bundle of laughs dawned on me. So it definitely gets the thumbs up for the reality check it gave me. Also I completely disagree with the suggestion that you sounded "bored" as the song went on, I reckon you sung the song exactly as it should be sung.

certainly not trying to hard 😉

Cheers Ernie, good to see someone realise that not all music is supposed to celebrate the marketed trivial joys of daily life, That said I'm tempted to write a song about young ladies in short skirts and Wellington boots...

oh and Nick, when is it, could be tempted if Rob's brining more of that lovely ale!

by 'accessible' do you mean that daily mail readers may like it?

i liked it, i don't read the daily mail.

nah a little less "you have to listen to get it, then you get it, then it sticks" (BBC Introducing)

No, it's not interesting enough to be accessible. The vocal sounds like you really could not be arsed rather than laconic,which is what I'm guessing is what you were going for,and the guitar needs a lot ( really...a lot!) of work on accuracy and timing.

If somebody had brought that to me, even as a rough demo,I've heard it about a million times they'd be thrown out of my office about two bars in. My professional opinion.....Sorry...........

tadeuszkrieger, would love your professional opinion on my stuff if you cba (sorry for encroaching on your thread MrNutt)

[url= http://soundcloud.com/barry-dodds ]My tunes[/url]

Barry, all beautifully performed, but from working on your own(guessing here) maybe a little un-focused and lacking in structure,but that's not necessarily a bad thing,Do you work with a band at all? if not, then it might be worth considering just for the discipline and focus

Those pieces I've heard would be far more than adequate quality,in terms of the performance for a music bank or library for film and tv. That any help?

spot on, thanks.

that recording was the first time I'd played it, that was actually the song forming on its own accord, hence its "work in progress" status, its a long way to go before its polished.

oh and tadeuszkrieger, you are Louis Spence and I claim my five pounds.

Sorry, walsh, not spence, i'm not upto speed on these modern "heros"

oh and if you want the more Rothmans/Waits thing, here you go:

http://soundcloud.com/oldghostsband/self-abduction-blues-1

let me know what you think.

Sorry, walsh, not spence

I think you were right first time.

MrNutt, how would you rate the technical side of your playing?

Functional. Shit. I don't care for it, but I do.

another example, of my shit song writing and dreadful guitar.

hahahahaha

I don't care. But I like it if anyone does. (lesson in life #006788)

Functional. Shit. I don't care for it, but I do.

Then might I suggest that you practice more? You clearly have a deep interest in what you're trying to do, but the technical side of your performance lets you down, in my opinion. A good player (timing, intonation) playing lazy and loose sounds beautiful (Drake, Martyn, Cash); a not-so-good player playing lazy and loose just sounds sloppy and half-arsed. It takes fair amount of skill to have the rattles and hums embellish the melody; otherwise it just sounds like you can't grip the strings tight enough or get to the next chord/fret in time.

As far as accessibility goes: it's not exactly experimental jazz; is it? I like the song and I think it has potential; but you need to play it better; spend more time with it...

Good Lord Above. 😯

Mind you, look on the bright side; at least I now know what gets rid of the local asbo yutes from outside my block. 😀

And the cats, and rats, and flies, and cockroaches, mould, woodworm, dry rot....

Glad to be of service.

Self taught, never had so much as a lesson in my life, perhaps I'll give it a go, still I'm kinda fond of the noise, there are dangers of electric.

Self taught, never had so much as a lesson in my life, perhaps I'll give it a go...

I didn't say get lessons; I said practice more.

I'll try and find the time