[Closed] Am I being an ungrateful sod? Centreparcs content

They are but all the associated crap isn't

Top tip - you don't need anywhere near as much crap as you think you do.

Treat it like bikepacking - trim down and bring what you really need. You'd be surprised how little that is.

Treat it like bikepacking - trim down and bring what you really need. You'd be surprised how little that is.

<Pictures OP shivering under a tarp in the forest>

Probably won't be far from reality if he's not careful. 🙂

Lots of classic STW me-me-me infantilism from the usual suspects.

As WASWAS says she's probably not up to planning the trip of a lifetime, just chill out and go with it - and book in a biking weekend in scotland/the lakes with the lads/lasses for when the sun's shining.

You know what, you're both wrong - but you're more wrong than she is. If she knows you don't like CP, then she's wrong to book a 40th birthday present for you there - but then does she know you don't like CP? She is also doing what almost all women do and being excited about the idea of being a family (when she's not too tired to think) - which is where booking CP for a family holiday comes in despite her not having realised it's not really great for a baby.

But you're also wrong - firstly because you're not giving CP a chance - I'd not enjoy a spa day either, but that's not what you're going for and it will be nothing like that. Admittedly I've never been to CP (too expensive for us), but I've been to Parkdean (static caravans, which I swore I'd never do), Butlins and Haven and despite initial reservations I've enjoyed all of them and will happily go back. It's not compulsory that you do anything when you're there, it's just a place to stay, and you can make of it what you will - I take a sea kayak and a bike and get to go out and play somewhere new for an hour or so a day and spend the rest with the family. As others have said, take a bike and there's good riding from the door. Go with the right attitude and you might just enjoy it.

You're also wrong, because you are a family now and life isn't the same - TBH your suggestions of booking a MTB holiday for your wife's birthday aren't at all comparable.

Finally you're wrong because, well because men are always wrong and women are always right. It will make your life a lot easier if you learn this. I'm struggling to see what you're gaining by upsetting your wife - probably a bit late for this now, but to come back to your first sentence you surely should have said "Centre Parcs?" with a wink and a leer.

molgrips - Member
They are but all the associated crap isn't
Top tip - you don't need anywhere near as much crap as you think you do.
Treat it like bikepacking - trim down and bring what you really need. You'd be surprised how little that is.

Hoppy jrs 1st bikepacking trip was at 3.5 years old.

Depends on what you're doing though, if you've got to provide the travel cot in accommodation and you've got a buggy then you're filling a room/boot pretty damn quick.

You are completely correct. It's pointless with a baby, but you may as well go along.
We went with our boys aged 9 and 12 and they loved it, and I enjoyed them enjoying it.
I have to say it's really expensive and for people who like the idea of an active lifestyle, but want it all laid on for them.
Saying all that, go along, take a bike to have a quick spin to get your shit together, then take baby for a swim, and have a beer playing pool or table tennis with the Mrs.
Shit weekend to go though- start of school hols.

They are but all the associated crap isn't.

It all fits in the car boot - what's the problem?

Mrs R may well have a sensible Butlins avoidance strategy sorted out there.

It's not great, I'd not be too happy if I were in your position, but I'd try and see the positives.

This. You can get some time away, Mrs CD can have some time to herself, and you can ride your bike. Center Parcs isn't my cup of tea either, but no point in ruining the weekend.

The difficulty is that most self catering accommodation doesn't want to do weekend only

I should probably mention that I mostly agree with all those (including the OP) suggesting it's fairly pointless with a little one - when kids were small we did just book cottages or B&Bs, it's only when the kids have got older we've got sucked into Butlins et al. I say mostly - because there is still the pool, which is presumably nice and convenient - TBH when we go to one of these places I reckon the pool is the facility we make by far the most use of, we'd be happy just to have that.

until that child is six months old, your only role is to support your woman and subsume your needs for her mental and physical wellbeing.

you're 40, stop sulking, suck it up.

Lots of classic STW me-me-me infantilism from the usual suspects.

My wife suggested CP for our summer holiday this year. Luckily both kids are not in school yet so we can go out of holiday time.
I managed to persuade her to go for Bluestone in Pembrokeshire instead. My thinking was that there is a beach (Tenby) nearby so if the weather is good we can spend time on the beach, coastal walks etc.

Unfortunately there is no beach near Sherwood.. 😐

I'm being heavily pressured to go to CP as well, Can't think of anywhere else in the UK that I'd rather go less, apart from Warrington.

[quote=Junkyard ]

Lots of classic STW me-me-me infantilism from the usual suspects.

Yes, given that it's not really appropriate.

Having just turned 40 I will jump to you're defense. OK, it helps that our kids are much older, (twins, 7) but we send them to Grandmas whilst we went off for the weekend to sample some of the Restaurants that featured on the trip, I spent some time fell running whilst the Mrs was in the Spa

If she had suggested centre parcs with the kids I would have told her to get stuffed.

You know when you bought that lingerie for your wife that would've made a stripper blush, that you both knew was really a present to yourself?

This is your wife's version of that

Go, smile, and try to look like you're enjoying it.

CP works. As in they make everything work there, food, activities, clean beds, entertainment. You are now part of a family of your own making and compromise is the central tenet of making that successful. You are allowed to be disappointed yes, but suck it up for now and next time round suggest you get to choose.

CP sells beer, acceptable food, you can ride your bike, you can leave and come back and there will be a big TV in your chalet to watch movies on. Go to the pool and play on the flumes. Enjoy the time with your wife and child Ya Numpty!

BTW 3 pages in before lunch is quite good.

[quote=stevied ]Unfortunately there is no beach near Sherwood..

Which would put me off a bit - as mentioned above I like to take my sea kayak on our holidays (only bought because I envisaged the future of beach holidays with the family). However we do also regularly go to CSMA at Whitemead in the FoD which isn't near the sea, but we get to go out riding our bikes as a family from the door. So not very dis-similar to Sherwood. IIRC you're local to me so that's worth a look once you get them riding bikes, or even if they enjoy bike seats or trailers (though most of the places we go are a lot more downmarket than CP or Bluestone, that's a lot less so).

I'm still really not getting all the CP hate - is it really that much worse than Butlins or Parkdean, or are you lot incapable of enjoying yourselves because it's not quite where you'd choose to go even though you're not actually forced to do anything?

Despite not having kids, I'm going to jump on this thread and offer my own opinion...

My 40th birthday was spent in Addenbrookes Hospital watching, helpless, as my wife lost our second child at 21 weeks gestation. After that, pretty much everything is irrelevant and trite so, you now what, I'm going to suggest that you suck it up, pack your bike and go to CP with your wife and new child.

Yes, it might be a bit rubbish, but it's better than what I went through on mine and, quite frankly, you'll be with two humans that you love (hopefully) for the weekend. It is, after all, only a day. It's not important, you don't feel any better or worse for it, and the next day will be exactly the same.

I think you know your being an ungrateful sod but you're probably knackered as well.

It'll be a good weekend if you go with an open mind (not keys in bowl type open mind) and just relax and have fun with your (tired) wife and baby.

Think yourself lucky, I've got to go to Euro ****ing Disney this year!! My worst nightmare. Far too much smiling. Only for a day as we pass Paris though, so shouldn't be too bad.

I'm still really not getting all the CP hate - is it really that much worse than Butlins or Parkdean, or are you lot incapable of enjoying yourselves because it's not quite where you'd choose to go even though you're not actually forced to do anything?

Hate is a bit strong, but I can think of many different family holidays I'd rather do, given its very high cost.

Is this thread actually real?! 😆

I've got to go to Euro **** Disney this year!

Now that I would veto!

Although it wouldn't come to it, cos my wife can't stand the idea either 🙂

Finally you're wrong because, well because men are always wrong and women are always right. It will make your life a lot easier if you learn this.

Yes, just have your wife keep your testicles in her hand bag for you and let you have them when needed. Lot's of henpecked husbands on this thread. It's the OP's birthday, he should spend it as he wishes. Who books something for someone else 40th without discussing it first? No you are not being ungrateful. Buy her a hoover for her birthday and tell her that's what its going to be like from now on. See if she is being ungrateful.

TBF I think he has a point here. His wife knows he doesn't like CP yet she has booked a weekend there. There are plenty of other options she could have looked at. It sounds to me like she isn't thinking about him and what he wants to do, rather herself and what she wants to do.

I think, after willard's post I'll leave this thread alone other than to say;

It may not be exactly what you wanted but it's time with your family, cherish it.

CP sells beer, acceptable food

I looked at the menu. [url= http://www.centerparcs.co.uk/images/pdfs/menus/2014/leisure_bowl_apr_2014.pdf ]http://www.centerparcs.co.uk/images/pdfs/menus/2014/leisure_bowl_apr_2014.pdf[/url]

Piss poor choice and a derisory wine list, surely your 40th birthday deserves better? Especially as it's probably served in a tattoo/blue and white sportswear environment with wipe clean seating and lift music at too high a volume.

Like a weatherspoons but without the beer choice.

I'm still really not getting all the CP hate

I suspect that no one who's been to Centre Parcs actually hates it.... they just hated paying for it.

If you go to Center Parcs and don't have a good time, who's fault is that?

Must be CP's fault for not providing decent accommodation or a nice location or adequate facilities, right?

I've been a few times and had a thoroughly fabulous time... because I wanted to.

Knuckledraggers
Ad hom
I
B
T
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Oh shit! We're on to the Centre Parcs Beer and wine list

Listen folks.... we really need to reign it in a bit. I think we might be about to hit a critical mass of pent up, passive aggressive, aloof, sniffy middle class angst.

Nobody knows what the end result of that is.

We came frighteningly close one time in the past when a Waitrose in Surrey briefly ran dangerously low on coffee, in the cafe, where people sat reading their complimentary newspapers, and briefly floated the idea of serving some instant. But luckily it was just about averted when a Polish girl on minimum wage was sent packing, and ordered not to return without freshly ground Columbian beans. Phew!

I'm just saying ... we're in unchartered waters here....

Nobody knows what the end result of that is

A smashed squash racquet and at least two uncomfortable silences???!!!!!????

molgrips - Member
I've got to go to Euro **** Disney this year!
Now that I would veto!

Although it wouldn't come to it, cos my wife can't stand the idea either

I am gonna get some riding in whilst away (Alps and Pyrenees) and we pass it 2 or 3 times a year so i suppose it's only fair we take the kids once. That's it though, never again!

Look at it from her perspective -
She want family time, she knows you'd like a break, she also wants the family to be in a nice safe environment, she'd like a spa / massage etc, she also knows you're outdoorsy and would probably like a bike ride. The fact its your birthday just makes it a good excuse to go away as a family. In her eyes its not about just you anymore...
You're now a family man and nothing is like it was 12 months ago.
Tell her you enjoyed it, act like you enjoyed it, stop being a stroppy teenager. Drop massive hints leading up to your 48th / 49th / 50th that you want to go biking in whistler for a fortnight, and then tell her you've booked it. Don't leave it to her to guess what you want.

[quote=perchypanther ]I suspect that no one who's been to Centre Parcs actually hates it.... they just hated paying for it.

Fair enough - I've alluded a few times that our holidays are more towards the budget end (I've no idea how all the Audi drivers on here would cope with the riff-raff at Butlins). Though that's not the impression I'm actually getting from some who appear determined to hate it.

To be fair Mr Smith, I think that menu is probably the bar food' down at the In Door Sports complex. CP does have a range of high street chains (no Greggs yet unfortunately) and decent Shop. I've even had a nicetake out' curry at CP.

OP, can't you escape for a few hours riding? Never been to the Sherwood CP, but Longleat has plenty of singletrack around it. You can't even escape Strava inside CP though.

Just go with the flow - rock up in your S-Max with 60 litres of Prosseco and enough M&S Meal Deals for 3 nights 😀

I'd be a bit pissed off if the wife had bought a trip she wanted (and knew I didn't) and dressed it up as a treat for my birthday, especially if it was my 40th. I don't know her, but it seems a bit underhand.
Having said that, I'd go. I'd feign enjoying myself and grab as much time with the little one as possible.
I would let it known not to book anything like this again, and that I had a rather large coupon. 😀

I'm with the OP on this.
My wife knows I'd rather stick forks in my eyes than go to somewhere remotely like Centre Parcs so I'd be in a huff like Rob too.
Especially if she'd booked it for my 40th. I was taken out for a ride with the wife whilst the kids were at school and then to Pizza Express with the kids and they loved it. Pizza Express isn't my preferred option but the kids enjoyed taking Daddy to a "posh" restaurant. Used vouchers for the meal too.
I do admit that there should be some give and take in a relationship but that's just taking the piss.

Stick the weekend on the classifieds here as there seems to be an abundance of Centre Parc lovers.

Half term is approaching. All Centre Parc lovers are packing already 😀

She want family time, she knows you'd like a break, she also wants the family to be in a nice safe environment, she'd like a spa / massage etc, she also knows you're outdoorsy and would probably like a bike ride. The fact its your birthday just makes it a good excuse to go away as a family. In her eyes its not about just you anymore...

[quote="aracer"]I've alluded a few times that our holidays are more towards the budget endMost of ours over the last "several" years have been under canvas.

Going to Centre Parcs is what families do.

It's not *all* that families do

Is it? I must have missed that memo. Perhaps what you meant in your correction is that it's not what all families do. We certainly don't.

Look at it from her perspective -
She want family time, she knows you'd like a break, she also wants the family to be in a nice safe environment, she'd like a spa / massage etc, she also knows you're outdoorsy and would probably like a bike ride. The fact its your birthday just makes it a good excuse to go away as a family. In her eyes its not about just you anymore...

So if she wants a break - fine. Just don't dress it up as a 40th present that the OP has made clear he wouldn't appreciate before now. That's what I would take issue with. People also seem to be missing the point that a family is actually a collective, not a unit headed up by a single person who makes all the decisions. Yes, it's a compromise but not at the expense of your own opinion.

[img] ?itok=G8KzrYuR[/img]

That looks like Bernard is giving Sid a bit of "Centre Parcs" action. 😯

Sid's lovin it. 😀

[quote=Scamper ]Half term is approaching. All Centre Parc lovers are packing already
Are they taking fudge?

Not necessarily aimed at the OP here.....

I have had a few holidays to CP, all seriously cheap and way cheaper than any cottage that would provide that standard of accommodation (non term time)

Also, you do realise it isn't a prison? you can leave and go anywhere you bloody well want.

Why would anyone with a baby give a damn about the beer or wine menu? Surely you won't be siting in the bar all day? take some decent stuff from home and just enjoy them at in the lodge whilst watching the wildlife with the little'un

As for those saying it's pointless for a baby, really? If a woods with nice accommodation in a safe environment and no cars is pointless for a baby then please enlighten me.

If people can't go to CP as a young family and have a wonderful time then I would suggest looking inwards in search of the answer.

I just don't see the point with a baby.

Why would anyone with a baby give a damn about the beer or wine menu?

Are you new here?

There are standards that must be maintained! We're not animals!!!

[img] [/img]

If people can't go to CP as a young family and have a wonderful time then I would suggest looking inwards in search of the answer.

Perfectly summed up. Way, way too much grumpiness in these quarters of late, and that is something that can be resolved by a change of mindset. Focus on that.

Why would anyone with a baby give a damn about the beer or wine menu?

Haven't you heard? It's derisory.

I couldn't (and still cant) possibly see what they gained from it when they were between 1-3yrs old apart from getting cold / wet / and a bad nights sleep for a week.

My two first went camping at that age - we all had a brilliant time.

I've just had a quick look at the prices 😯

The only thing preventing me from taking the family is that I haven't got a spare £800!

Go this time, make the most of it and if you still don't like it then its time to sit down and have a chat about future holidays. Plenty of holiday options with kids that don't involve CP. We've gone camping with our kids since they were wee and they love it, maybe if you're not well enough prepared it could be a bit shit.

The only thing preventing me taking the family is that I haven't got a spare £800!

It will cost me less than that to go camping in the south of France for two weeks. Not a difficult choice AFAIC.

[img] [/img]

It's not that expensive, march weekend cost for 2 bed accommodation is running at £450 ish. That's £150/night for a whole family, it'd cost you that to stop in a shitty premier inn without the access to the pool, play areas, etc.

[quote=mrhoppy ]That's £150/night for a whole family, it'd cost you that to stop in a shitty premier inn

I'm guessing premier inns are beneath you and you've never stayed in one - they're way, way cheaper than that.

http://www.premierinn.com/gb/en/search.html?searchModel.searchTerm=Ollerton,%20Nottinghamshire&LOCATION=53.20381,-1.01902&ARRdd=04&ARRmm=03&ARRyyyy=2016&NIGHTS=3&ROOMS=1&ADULT1=2&CHILD1=2&COT1=0&INTTYP1=FAM&SID=4

£165 for a March 3 night weekend, £55 a night

[img] [/img]

Go midweek outside of holiday time and it can be very cheap, we paid something like £170 for 4 nights sharing a chalet with 2 other couples and their 6month olds.

I actually really enjoyed it, dads packaged the mums off for a morning to the spa as a reward for the hard work they have been putting in looking after the little ones.

Generally just wandered round and chilled out.

Yes I would have liked to have been belting around on the mtb, but it wasn't that type of break and the family really enjoyed it.

Need to be positive it will be fun!

£450 for a weekend? 😯
Shit the bed, I never realised it was that expensive.

You're clearly not middle class enough, you urchin!

How much is it for a weekend at Centre Parcs? is one of the first questions on the exam, just after the trick question: How much is a coffee in Watrose? but before: list the address of your nearest Audi dealership? 😉

[quote=binners ] the trick question: How much is a coffee in Watrose?

Priceless?

aracer - Member
mrhoppy » That's £150/night for a whole family, it'd cost you that to stop in a shitty premier inn
I'm guessing premier inns are beneath you and you've never stayed in one - they're way, way cheaper than that.

I frequently stop in them, through work and went to London with the family recently. Stopped in Slough, was about £80 for the three of us in one room. Add on the cost of getting into a swimming pool for all of us and its not that dissimilar and they're ideal rep locations not going on holiday locations, usually by a major road or in the town centre.

The ones I've stopped in with work have been brand new but managed to give the wrong room details so walked in on someone sleeping, not changed soiled sheets, not cleanded the bathroom and not changed the towels so I've been faced with a skiddy as I started to dry myself.

Plenty of people here saying that not going is unreasonable / ungrateful (and he arguably is, but then I like CP). But in what parallel universe is the OP's OH still going reasonable?

The missus has booked a holiday she, presumably, knows the OP won't like. Which is a shitty thing to do straight out of the gate. She then dresses it up as his 40th birthday present, which is doubly shit.

The OP expresses his disinterest / disappointment, [i]surely[/i] the only sensible, rational thing to do next is to cancel it and use the money to book something different that they'll both enjoy? But no, she's going on her own, demonstrating admirably who the present was actually for all along. If my missus booked herself an expensive present for my 40th birthday, said "this is the way holidays going to be from now on so get used to it" and then sodded off on her own, I'd have changed the locks by the time she got back. Cheeky mare.

Mmm I've not read any of the responses but yes you are ungrateful! However stating that this is how it is from now on is rubbish.
My kids are just 11 and nearly 14. In that time we have done everything from centre parcs to canal boats to beach holidays to surfing holidays to biking to festivals to Castle hunting in Scotland. I've loved everyone of them because it's precious time I get to spend with my little tribe....

The ones I've stopped in with work have been brand new but managed to give the wrong room details so walked in on someone sleeping, not changed soiled sheets, not cleanded the bathroom and not changed the towels so I've been faced with a skiddy as I started to dry myself.

[img] [/img]

The missus has booked a holiday she, presumably, knows the OP won't like. Which is a shitty thing to do straight out of the gate. She then dresses it up as his 40th birthday present, which is doubly shit.

More likely to be miscommunication or oversight, no?

Regardless, I haven't forgotten what it was like to have a four month old baby, and of course it was harder for my wife. Some tolerance and understanding is required, I think.

What can I say, people in Wigan are animals.

There's an idea, Linton isn't that far away, perhaps I suggest I go the the Travel Tavern instead of CP. Sally Fields could entertain me whilst Mrs CD looks after the baby. It's all about ME after all.

Ungrateful - possibly
Honest - yes

Why pretend, esp if your other half knows its something you wont like? She has made the error...

I'd certainly hope that Centret Parcs wouldn't be taking bookings from Wiganers. Or people from Blackburn or Burnley come to that. How frightful!

Well,now that this thread has gone full Mumsnet,it's well and truly knackered the surprise party she had planned all along.

Well,now that this thread has gone full Mumsnet,it's well and truly knackered the "surprise" [s]party[/s] she had planned all along.

FTFY.

[img] ?noredirect[/img]

OP I'm afraid I'm in the 'you are being a selfish tw*t camp', but then you are a new dad at 40 so it's a well know phenomenon.

Centre Parcs is fine, I can't understand how you will be so miserable there as at most basic it is simply a cabin in the woods with access to a swimming pool.

Firstly I'd like to say this has nothing to do with a certain vintage Mums Net thread, sorry to disappoint you.

/kicks dog.

My wife wants to go to CP but would know not to do this as knows I hate the idea and would make a fuss. Indeed last year the extended family all went but us lot didn't. Having said that we might end up going to a French one this year albeit with me disappearing on the bike some days as at least the family will have stuff to do without me around. And foreign things are always more fun - and cheaper.

I've not read pages 2 - 4 but Cougar has it about right:

The missus has booked a holiday she, presumably, knows the OP won't like. Which is a shitty thing to do straight out of the gate. She then dresses it up as his 40th birthday present, which is doubly shit.

The OP expresses his disinterest / disappointment, surely the only sensible, rational thing to do next is to cancel it and use the money to book something different that they'll both enjoy?

Of course - as fasthaggis suggests - this could be an elaborate surprise birthday party that is now on a fast track to being ruined 😆

£450 for two nights has seen me in three different quality pub restaurants with high quality food and wine . All recommendations off here . or a cottage at portmerion with meals . I'm sure taking a baby would not have increased the cost much or reduced the fun at all.
I hate the idea of centerparcs and can understand your frustration at being landed with it as a significant birthday present but it's booked make the most of it it is a weekend away with those you love and who love you , you may be pleasantly surprised if you go along and will certainly be miserable if you don't and i predict your misery will be deeper and last longer than a duff weekend in CP.

May be she has a surprise treat planned for you!!

Could you imagine the outpouring of grief if the shoe had been on the other foot. Husband books holiday that the wife didn't want.

Mumsnet would be rounding up a lynching party as we speak (type) and the internet would be in meltdown about the oafish husband who didn't listen to his wife.

Because it's the other way around the OP is being told to suck it up.

**** that. Put your foot down now or be walked over for the rest of your time together.

Are you man or mouse?

Coming dear............

The surprise is that her parents are coming as well.