You don't need to be an 'investor' to invest in Singletrack: 6 days left: 95% of target - Find out more
Thing is in order to go on most trips we still need a reliable way to get to the airport/ferry or drive halfway across the country.
Ideally, yes. Good point. Has your old car let you down on holiday yet…? 🤞🏼
Engine output increased to 227 PS (224 hp; 167 kW) at 6000 rpm
Max. torque of 277 N⋅m (204 lb⋅ft) at 4500 rpm.[3]
That’s mad, you sure that was the output?, I thought is was 250 bhp ish, I managed to get my VW Gti 16v engine up to 194 bhp and 176 lb/ft, and my recent Tiguan 2.0d was 240 bhp and 400 lb ft but it did have a remap and filter/intercooler by a mate at Celtic tuning.
That’s mad, you sure that was the output?, I thought is was 250 bhp ish,
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_Sierra_RS_Cosworth
So says wikipedia, the RS500 was an utterly bonkers car, for its time, to be fair!
Just shows you how far modern engines have evolved, there was a loads of Cosworths and M3’s in kirkcudbright back in the 80’s/early 90’s due to skippers on the fishing boats trying to outcompete each other, then in the 90’s/2000’s they all moved onto Subaru’s and Mitsubishi evo’s. One of the skippers still has all his Subaru’s including the special editions locked up in a barn on his farm, must have a small fortune in cars but as he now owns 3 boats I doubt he’s short of money.
As of other have said £600 is much less than a new car. At this point its depreciation and maintenance are probably much less than on a newer vehicle.
I think people are getting a bit hung up on that last MOT, It's not the cost of a new car or maintenance that concerns me really TBH, it's the consequences of an ageing, potentially unreliable car with an increasing number of things failing, depreciation is kind of irrelevant with a 16 year old car.
I think the solution is to select three options and present them in an easy format to the disinterested party. Three or four points about each one relating to her interests/concerns (eg colour options, size, mpg, features). Then ask her which she’d prefer or state your favourite.
Trick her into engaging.
That's probably the best advice so far, I shall attempt to do this I think. Would it be OTT to make a full PowerPoint do we reckon?
I bet the Venn Diagram isn’t as wide ranging as you reckon.
Try sticking say 12k limit into Autotrader for the sake of argument.
Now. Petrol or diesel? I’d suggest if you currently have a shitbox C4 (with no disrespect towards the venerable C4 intended) you probably don’t do mega miles. So petrol.
Manual or auto? Manual, because as you point out auto boxes go wrong, etc.
Almost on the money, and yes I've spent many hours poking round autotrader and other sites.
Sadly it's got to be auto though, she's only got an auto license 🙂 hence the current auto shitbox.
And almost all of the options you listed would probably fall foul of her dislike of driving bigger cars, which includes the current one (it is a horrendous wallowy sofa of a thing TBF) but her contradictory statements so far also align with mine and she agrees that we need a big enough car for five of us, plus a large enough boot for the scooter of doom and/or luggage, basically she wants a TARDIS...
I've proposed the 'two car solution' a few times in the past (we had two cars when she first passed). I reckoned going to a small auto (or better yet small leccy car) primarily for local use (by both of us) and a larger family car that could be manual or auto (primarily for me to drive), but she's not keen on that either for reasons...
I may just ease her into the idea by getting a new family car, but keeping the old shitroen for a bit, just for my use/as a backup, keep all the back seats folded down permanently, it's not a bad car for slinging a bike or two in the back of, or doing tip trips. Once she's used to the two car solution I can chop the Shitroen in for something smaller.
It's not just the engine, it's the power to weight ratio, on the little brakes and little tyres compared to modern cars... quite scary! I wouldn't fancy crashing in one!
Can’t you just work out what size one you want and buy one? Aren’t most cars basically the same?
No! I can absolutely state, quite categorically, that different cars from different manufacturers will vary dramatically, in the way they drive and handle, in comfort, in the way that controls and dashboard layouts are set out, and pedal layouts as well, will make a car that seems absolutely perfect turn into a raging nightmare half an hour after you get into it and start driving. I have personal experience of driving hundreds of different vehicles, over something like a 100,000 miles across a couple of years, and some that people on here rave about, like Berlingos, have practically reduced me to tears after less than an hour into a three hour drive, because they’re so uncomfortable to drive.
An hour’s drive in a year-old Mercedes A-Class was sheer misery after thirty minutes due to the seats being so hard, I’ve honestly sat on wooden church pews that were better. If at all possible, ask to have a car over a weekend and put a few hours in driving it, because little irritations become major annoyances that will drive you nuts; the single stalk that Mercedes insists on using for indicators and wipers has pissed me off every single time I’ve driven one, including the C63 AMG I drove up the M5.
Then there’s all the touch screens, electronic handbrakes and stupid, badly designed ergonomics - Peugeot 208’s have a ‘holographic’ dash display, along with a hexagonal steering wheel, and the flat top of the wheel completely blocks the view of the digital speed display; I’m roughly 6’, and there was no way I could adjust the seat that allowed me to comfortably drive the car and actually see how fast I was going, bearing in mind that these cars were for school of motoring pupils! I was only applying the vinyl graphics for the motoring schools and moving them around the site and I was having trouble seeing what the display was showing, in order to stick to the 10mph limit in site.
As a result I made a highly informed decision on the car I chose to buy; I can promise you that a great many popular cars that are on the market now I wouldn’t touch with a barge-pole.
Just buy yourself a sensible car and throw the keys and log book for the rot bucket over to her, and say 'bon appetite'.
Would it be OTT to make a full PowerPoint do we reckon?
Even more to unpick.... !
But yes, choose a few cars and show them. State your preference and see if you can get some feedback on colour or 'must have' specs.
And almost all of the options you listed would probably fall foul of her dislike of driving bigger cars, which includes the current one (it is a horrendous wallowy sofa of a thing TBF) but her contradictory statements so far also align with mine and she agrees that we need a big enough car for five of us, plus a large enough boot for the scooter of doom and/or luggage, basically she wants a TARDIS…
Ay caramba. All that and it's got to be small into the bargain?! 🤔
To be honest it sounds like you have a pretty good handle on what the constraints are and what you need as a family. It also sounds as though you're Chief Research Officer in your house: same here, although MrsP engages with the process at a kind of executive level. It makes a big difference having someone to act as a sounding board at least. Like you I wouldn't spend this kind of money (or really any significant amount) from the joint finances without getting the other person's say so.
I’d just buy what I wanted within the scope of it fitting in with family life. If she’s not that bothered, then she’ll quickly get over any disappointment/issues. It’s an opportunity really.
Surely anything is better than the warm bucket of wallpaper paste which the Gashqai represents?
If it's red and has to begin with an S , then a Toyota Supra in red should be on the top of the list .
On the plus side, you didn't rush into things and buy a Nissan Qashqai
Do they do auto Berlingos? They are quite small on the road for the interior space.
@singletrackmind or S4, S5 or S6 in estate version because of needing to take trail dog and bike to the nearest centre.
“Do other blokes really just go out and spunk £10k+ on things without discussion/agreement with their other halves?”
Yes.
We share responsibility for the household bills but pay for them out of our separate accounts.
She buys her own cars and I buy mine. £30k plus on my Alfa Romeo Giulia. My money , my decision.
Similarly with my bikes or her hand bags. As long as we meet our obligations to the keep the house going, we spend our own money as we see fit.
Is the underlying issue that the op is anxious that the car is going to break down and this is causing him stress. Whereas partner is more relaxed- when it breaks we’ll either fix it or buy another sort of attitude. So it’s not a money issue.
If that is the case maybe try setting it out like that ie I’m worried it will break down and would sleep easier at night, focus at work better if we got a new one. Rather than it ‘might’ break down. It then becomes a double empathy problem, can see she put her self in your shoes to appreciate you are stressed about it.
Any car ‘might’ break down, even a newer one. So As a general rule the car you have is usually the cheapest option over a newer one unless someone catastrophic fails. That is unless you are RNP when people seem to give him cars for a fraction of the amount WBAC would give them even if the thing was a battered wreck!
Do other blokes really just go out and spunk £10k+ on things without discussion/agreement with their other halves?
...
the struggle is more over getting her engaged in a decision she recognises needs to be made but just won’t
Needing a new car would be a joint decision. After that she's either interested in what you get or she isn't. No?
You know what, I've been wrong for years.
Apologies.
The red car was "just" a cosworth not a rs500.
I feel the pain from the OP...
I'm frequently stuck in the no-man's-land of "I'm too disinterested to commit to a decision or action plan" coupled with "I don't like the current situation"....
I swear women are just mad!
The current issue is the the paradox of "I'm too disinterested to learn how to charge or drive the new EV, AND don't be controlling and tell me how to drive or charge the new EV" coupled with "I get stressed out cos I've no idea how to drive or charge the new EV".
I GIVE IN SOMETIMES.
DrP
So bad you gave in twice? 😉
I swear women are just mad!
I swear men never really got over puberty.
There are three scenarios here. I make a decision, you make a decision, or we make a joint decision. I don't care which, but pick one.
You don't get to defer to me and then whine that you don't like it, any more than you get to sit in the passenger seat complaining about my driving. You want to drive, be my guest. You want me to drive, that's absolutely fine too. You want to sit there wittering away like R2-D2, telling me how shit I am for the next two hours, read your ****ing book or I'm leaving you on the hard shoulder.
(I would, of course, never do that, but bloody hell.)
No! I can absolutely state, quite categorically, that different cars from different manufacturers will vary dramatically, in the way they drive and handle, in comfort, in the way that controls and dashboard layouts are set out, and pedal layouts as well, will make a car that seems absolutely perfect turn into a raging nightmare half an hour after you get into it and start driving.
I don't have @CountZero 's experience but I've driven lots of different cars in cycle race convoys from loads of different sponsors and yes, there are some I would happily have parked in a ditch after a couple of hours and some that I'd have liked to take home with me!
Volvo (XC70) was probably the best I've driven recently. Had a BMW convertible once which was an ostentatious POS - had a "feature" where on starting the engine it'd auto-blip the throttle a couple of times. Can imagine the neighbours reaction on about the third morning of starting that thing up. There he goes again, revving his ****ty car. 🙄
Sounds like me when my wife talks to me about changing our mortgage provider.
I swear women are just mad!
I swear men never really got over puberty.
All women are destined to become their mother, that is their burden. Men will never achieve this, that is their burden.
EDIT And like @Cougar I too have offered the you drive, be quiet or you can get out options in the past. Are you my long lost, northern, secret brother?
I think the question needs rephrasing, with some thought into possible answers.
'do you agree a better car would be beneficial for the family'
If no - why not.
Anything else, take the walk slowly towards her making the choice ultimately.
If you get a no at the first question and she won't entertain justifying her reasoning at all, then she is too controlling and selfish imho. At that point, I'd be digging a hole in the garden. 😉
It’s not really a gender thing. It’s an attitude to certain things in life.
Now a couple I know well have in my opinion have a bonkers attitude to cars. Although in this case they seem to agree.
Pre pandemic he was had a national role in a building company. He lived in Bedfordshire and the main office was in Bristol. He did vast miles in a company car day trips to Edinburgh type thing. When they changed to a mileage allowance he bought the company car, a Vectra. One day she was driving me to work in it and mentioned getting something fixed on it. At this point it had done 297,000 miles!! I pointed out that maybe the car had earnt
It’s keep. Any way at 300,000 miles it died. I should possibly mention here they live in what to me looks like a small Manor House but is actually a large ex rectory with substantial grounds and out buildings. So he replaced the vectra with another one in a private sale. It had done 100,000 miles and is located in Leicester. On the hand over say he decides the £30 train fair to Leicester is too much and hitch hikes to get it.
Can you change the mother in laws mobility scooter for one that fits in a more normal sized boot so you can get a smaller car?
I would just buy a nice, sensible little shopping car like a GR Yaris and have done. You can get them in red, so all good and 'Y' is about as similar to 'S' as 'Q' is, in fact Yaris ends in 'S'. Sorted innit 🙂
There are three scenarios here. I make a decision, you make a decision, or we make a joint decision. I don’t care which, but pick one.
Exactly!
My approach is..."You suggest a choice, and I'll remain chilled about it.
Unless I'm really not chilled about it, then we can BOTH contribute and make a joint choice"
Sigh!
DrP