The emperors new cl...
 

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[Closed] The emperors new clothes

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We see new tech BS all the time in the bike world but this flim-flammery from Tioga takes the biscuit.
[url= http://www.tiogausa.com/video/tioga-video.html ]
http://www.tiogausa.com/video/tioga-video.html [/url]

"The knobs help you land jumps" Oh Dear.

It kind of pisses me off when bike companies take us as idiots and make such outlandish claims.

It does however also entertain me just a little bit too (God knows I need some entertaining, I have had a cast on right arm since April)

So I wondered what other New-Tech ( or indeed Retro ) manufacturers BS had caught your eye. Any other such stark examples of Emperors New Clothes out there we can poke fun at?


 
Posted : 13/10/2012 10:17 pm
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Marketing I believe they call it.


 
Posted : 13/10/2012 10:21 pm
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I don't know about knobs helping you land jumps, but once my bollocks helped slow me down when I hung up on a double and they got sucked in between the tyre and the saddle. I had to check for blood. Beyond eye-watering.


 
Posted : 13/10/2012 10:25 pm
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TroutWrestler

they got sucked in between the tyre and the saddle. I had to check for blood. Beyond eye-watering.

Makes a very distinctive noise doesn't it?


 
Posted : 13/10/2012 10:33 pm
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I don't know about knobs helping you land jumps, but once my bollocks helped slow me down when I hung up on a double and they got sucked in between the tyre and the saddle. I had to check for blood. Beyond eye-watering.

Shit the bed.


 
Posted : 13/10/2012 10:38 pm
 poly
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"The knobs help you land jumps" Oh Dear.
That's not actually what it said though. If you want to complain about exagerated marketing claims you really shouldn't take their claim and 'enhance it'.

They actually say:

On impact from landing a jump, the knobs will alter its shape to enhance tread contact for greater stability.


 
Posted : 13/10/2012 10:54 pm
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I wouldn't recommend using your knob for any form of landing having fractured mine during a vinegar stroke accident in my earlier twenties (a ruptured tunica, for those of a technical mind) ; i think every doctor and medical student in devon and cornwall got to witness it looking like an aburgine. It was only slightly less embarrassing that having my repaired member photo'ed for medical science, i thought they may lend me a camera......:oops:
Still all is now fine bar a small scar and a slight drift to the left; and i'm still banging it out like a jackhammer 8)


 
Posted : 13/10/2012 11:20 pm
 Pook
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Knob activeness exaggerated to show effect

I believe hora has this tattooed just below his belly button.


 
Posted : 14/10/2012 5:54 am
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tears that are both laughter and wincing? That.

Mate of mine (honest) had a slightly over enthusiastic new girlfriend who was polishing his pride and joy with more exuberance than technique and ended up snapping his banjo string. Apparently they can bleed quite a lot.


 
Posted : 14/10/2012 7:18 am
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Oh dear, I guess this is what happens when you start a thread with 'knob' references in it.

@poly - Geees - It's just a bit of fun, calm down dear.


 
Posted : 14/10/2012 9:04 am
 ski
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So that's how you pronounce Tioga 😀


 
Posted : 14/10/2012 9:08 am
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still banging it out like a jackhammer

What a beautiful and poetic image for this fine morning of the Lord 😉


 
Posted : 14/10/2012 9:54 am
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ski - that deserves a 🙂


 
Posted : 14/10/2012 10:02 am
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This is no worse than the replies you get in "What tires" threads.


 
Posted : 14/10/2012 3:18 pm

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