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Work,kids,bills,more work,more bills,clients,tax,mortgage,oil,kids piano lessons,moaning Missus etc etc etc etc,no holidays,no **** all anymore! will it ever get better? There,I said it...or is it just me?
Nope, and you'll get a divorce and the missus will be a **** about everything. That might just be my experience though.
💡 Call a call girl?
That's just more bills querty!
Nah, that's just the usual humdrum I reckon, just hope nowt bad happens to you or those close to you and all will be fine
#firstworldproblems
You have a job, a family and a bike.
Stop moaning and start making some small positive changes.
This is one of the main reason we don't want kids.
Life's a bitch and then you die
Easier said than done cloud nine.
Bin the piano lessons (FFS!) and go on holiday 😀 Then buy the kids some drums and a guitar.
Start with some tiny positives then.. Focusing too much on lifes negatives is hardly productive.
'.......... an unlovely struggle against unfair odds culminating in a cheap funeral.'
I hear what you're saying cloud nine but what positives there are,are often quickly washed over by the negatives unfortunately
Thank you Nipper for you're kind words.Obviously a major player in the empathy business!
Having swum in the tide of middle age, middle class, modern life for a number of years I'd say we all need to sometimes step back and have a look, and as said above, make some small positive changes. Otherwise you either get old, or some proper bad crap will come along and you'll wish for the way it is now !
Feel like I am in much the same boat mate.
No solutions from me - just commiseration!
Thats a relief, not just me then.
Reckon if I pack in smoking I might have another 20, possibly 30 years left. 😀
Dirty dog,I might take up smoking so that I have only 20 or 30 years left! Somebody give me one small generic positive change then,as that seems to be the general consensus as to the way forward.
Stop paying for stuff you don't need and be thankful for what you have, rather than wanting what you can't.
Watch Guy Martin's two parter from India.
Do it right now.
Tomorrow.. Don't shout at the kids or argue with your Mrs.
Don't raise your voice all day..
. Ok, go out tomorrow for a walk, or a bike ride, think about the moment, not your worries. Then think that you are physically able to have just done it, be grateful. Try googling around 'mindfulness' - some good principles around 'living for the moment'Somebody give me one small generic positive change
Looking on the bright side Bigbang you have served your purpose on this earth, namely passing on your genes.
Wouldn't reccomend taking up smoking though!
Kayla1 do you mean things like food,oil,clothing,mortgage? Stupid stuff like that? where did I give any indications about buying stuff I don't need?
No it's not just you, it's "normal" in our society now, priorities are twisted beyond belief. Try and step back, take a breath and a hard look at your life and focus on what really matters, your wife? Your kids? Try and take some time together to take stock of what really matters. Talk, tell somebody how you feel, a friend your GP your wife if you can. Corny I know but this is it you don't get a second chance, if it's broke fix it now or it may be too late
If life's a bitch then I'm gonna **** the arse off her.
^^^ would hope so given your username 😀
Hi Bigbang
Small steps... but before you can take them you have to want to take them.
Work is a tough one, could you commute on your bike? In fact any exercise will help.
Or just make sure you take some time out at lunchtime instead of working through... I had a stressful job a few years back and found that a 10 minute relaxation CD I bought really help me to recharge at lunchtime... it lead me to see that time is more important than money, I now have more time and absolutely no money! Kinda like it though.
The kids should be a boon not a problem, if they are horrid little devils it's probably because you made them that way. Reset your relationship with them, look at them as people rather than your 'kids' and go have some fun with them.
Do the same with the wife... in fact go give her a hug right now, maybe talk to her about how you feel, do it calmly while rubbing her shoulders, she is probably struggling too. It'll be so much easier to come through this tough time as part of a team.
The rest is just noise, focus on what is really important.
As for holidays, go camping or give youth hostels a go... if there is not enough money for that take the family to the beach or some local hills/countryside, maybe do some geocaching to add some fun.
Then once it's dark break out a flask of Horlicks and do some stargazing.
When you strip all the consumer s##t away life can be pretty good.
If I sound preachy I apologize as that certainly isn't my intention.
Good luck.
The question to ask yourself is; is your family worth all the sacrafices you have to make?
I sort of understand your problem but it's hard to really "get" some one else's life
I find meditation helps life seem better, it's free as well
It's hard to value what we have and do.
It's so easy to ride for an hour and wish we had longer or were fitter etc.
Where as we should be glad that we road for an hour
Oh and you need some one to talk to, even if it's on the phone
Ps I do get to go on holiday. But that doesn't mean my life is a bed of roses. I won't moan about my life here. But try and be grateful for what you have
I'm just citing kids wife etc as a rant really...I
Love them all dearly and my relationship with my kids in fantastic.One has autism but we're best mates.But that doesn't mean it's not incredibly challenging,add to that,a declining business and it's a pretty scary time being responsible for a lot of people.I take a lot of excercise and believe it or not Ive just done a 20min sweetspot session on the turbo between posts,to try and fight off this god awful feeling..and there is no doubt that works...it's the only thing that keeps me sane...I know half the world is in my position and I'm not looking sympathy...just spelling it out really to get it down and out of me.
Sounds like you have a good grasp on things.
The declining business and the sense of responsibility are the issue I suspect... time to look at other avenues.
This is one of the main reason we don't want kids
Whereas I read 'kids' as a positive among the other 'lifenoise'.
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I get this from time to time. In those times its my kids and wife that I hold onto most - everything else I can deal with as long as I've got them - even when they're being a PITA.
I know its hardest to see the above when it all feels like swimming in glue. I often get the feeling it shouldn't be this hard but hey whats the alternative?
Bit cheesey but I remember one of those comic relief emotional blackmail videos where they sent celebrities out to a slum in Africa. Lenny Henry was staying in a tin hut with a dude who went out every night and cleared out all the latrines into wheelbarrows full of stinking sh1t all for a few pence to feed his wife and kids. How much sh1t will you shovel for your kids Lenny Henry asked himself?
< quite a lot it seems for premier inn... >
If you want some positives, then just be thankful that neither of these happened to you today...
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-31617941
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-31602247
And that you didn't get stuck on the M23 for 2 hours, this morning 🙁
where did I give any indications about buying stuff I don't need?
piano lessons?
contra nando incrementum
Are you and your family healthy?
Do you have a job that provides for them.
Do you live in a society with drinkable water, plentiful food and without the ever present risk of dying from violence or disease?
If you answer yes to the above then you're doing better than many people in the world.
Remember to enjoy the positive things in life while you have them.
look up the changeability podcast - brilliantlivingHQ.com
They're a bit MC, but the points they make and the techniques they talk about are useful