You don't need to be an 'investor' to invest in Singletrack: 6 days left: 95% of target - Find out more
I almost was.
Fortunately I spotted it coming in at about 2 o' clock in front of me against the backdrop of some dark buildings, also spotted the seagull pulling away. That was enough for some mental ballistics reckoning (or I was just lucky) to decide that the required avoidance manoeuvre was to slam the brakes. Lost view of the incoming deposit but a second later it splatters across a small table sized area a metre in front of me. Quite a big one, would have been messy, but if it had been smaller I might not have spotted it in time.
Have you ever been shat on while riding?
I'm expecting birds but I don't want to discourage unexpected responses.
Not shat on, but got headbutted by a squirrel once!
Rode under a tree just as a wood pigeon decided to evacuate it's breakfast, landed on my shoulder, strange brown colour, not your standard bird dropping, I saw it in my peripheral, I thought a small animal had landed on me for a second, luckily I wasn't far from home and did a swift jersey change, thank christ it didn't land more inboard.
I have dodged a couple of those whilst walking. I did get hit on the head by an acorn once though when biking, and very nearly a hefty branch earlier this year.
Are you sure it wasn't a pigeon and you weren't a statue? 😉
Seagull shit on my commuter bike saddle (locked to railings on street) twice last week. Was going to post it in the disproportionately cross thread but realized it failed on the disproportionately cross bit.
Not a kink i think i need to explore.
Shat on by a bird (feathered, winged thing) while riding your bicycle 🙂
It’s supposed to bring you luck😂😂😂
I have been sprayed by cicadas quite a few times when riding... sometimes into the mouth.
It's gross, but it's better than having a cicada land on you when it's going full chirp. That hurts the ears.
Got hit in the face by a pigeon once. Not just the poo but the whole bird. They are not as soft and fluffy as they look!
I had a huge, viscous, meat-based turd land on my shoulder while stopped in the woods on a night ride years ago. Either a bird of prey, an escaped monkey or a wild man, I reckon.
I was also hit by a lump of meat (innards of a small mammal) while doing my paper round in the 70s. I’ve had nothing but good luck since.
Go big or go home.
Years ago I was on an intro kayaking course at Plas y Benin. We were paddling down the tidal section of the Conwy estuary and I got shat on by a swan which took off from a sand bank.
It was a proper low level bombing run. I was covered in stinky swan shit.
The problem was resolved by a wet exit from the kayak.
Once had a blackbird fly out of a hedgerow and impale its beak into my kneecap. Vividly remember looking down and seeing it there and a split second later it was gone.
User name almost perfect ^^ l👍😉🙃
molgripsFree Member
I have dodged a couple of those whilst walking. I did get hit on the head by an acorn once though when biking
Shame you where not in America,
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/world-us-canada-68301239
is this a sex thing?
A couple of times, in many years of riding though.
My favourite debris strike is in autumn when a seed pod or nut etc falls from the tree and dings the bell on my bars. A rare and very nice random interaction.
Not bike related but pretty bizarre. Driving close to home last week, saw a golden eagle sat on a wall by the road which took off as we passed. It had a large snake in its claws, think about 2 metres long. The snake was fighting pretty hard and wrapped itself around the eagle which promptly dropped it on the car, it made quite a thud. Would have made quite an insurance claim had we crashed.
No, I live in Cataluña Spain but still rare outside the mountains
Punched an owl on a night ride.
...or rather it flew in to my hand.
Anyway, got splattered with owl shit and bits of worms.
Was once on a night ride with Bunnhop and NBT, of this parish, and one of their mates got taken out by a badger, It was quite a nasty wreck too.
I've had my bars completely covered by bird poop whilst parked at a works site. Didn't have anything on me to wipe off until I got back to my main office.
On my old commute I once happened across a lady doing a poo in the middle of a busy cycle track. Right in the middle mind, not even off to one side. She looked quite put out when I rode around her.
On my old commute I once happened across a lady doing a poo in the middle of a busy cycle track. Right in the middle mind, not even off to one side. She looked quite put out when I rode around her.
That very nearly meets the OPs criteria, to be fair
I used to live on a street that had a few cooking apple trees part way down it; got one full on the head (sans helmet) riding home from the shop one day. Very nearly took me off the bike and left quite the bump behind.
That very nearly meets the OPs criteria, to be fair
Yes, could easily be a fetlife thread title. 🤣
Biking no, walking yes - on my way to a posh (wearing a suit and everything) meeting a couple of months back.
I did have a bee go up the leg of my baggies on a ride and I could feel it wandering around little Mr hoppy, led to an emergency stop and drop of the shorts and much flapping to shoo it off. Much to the look of horror of the wedding party exiting the church opposite.
I keep riding this thread title as "Shat on a bird while riding?"
which in all fairness would be very impressive!
Got hit by a flying fish once (not while riding a bike). Bigger than I expected.
These birds sound like politicians to me 🤔
That very nearly meets the OPs criteria, to be fair
I thought it was close enough to be relevant.
I had a goose take off and fly straight into my thigh once. Left a big bruise. We obviously each assumed the other would stop.
Presumably why we talk about "playing chicken" and not "playing goose ".
Not riding but I've twice had a pigeon hit me right on top of the head. 🤮
No bird poop thankfully, though i did get hit on the shoulder by a pineapple is Sri Lanka.
Just sitting there minding me own business and WALLOP. Scared the beejesus out me. Who knew Pineapples fall from trees on innocent unsuspecting tourists.
These birds sound like politicians to me 🤔
Rüppell's vulture seems to be the bird of choice for getting shat on by from a great height. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_birds_by_flight_heights
11,300m
Weighs 9kg
Eats rotting meat
Fitted a new restrap bar bag to my new gravel bike on the patio - immediately shat on by a bird - man shaking fist and shouting at the sky - daughter rolling around laughing at the sad old man.
Not quite shat on but a defining moment during last years bike packing trip was definitely having a headless bird fall from a tree and land right next to me
I had a huge, viscous, meat-based turd
Sorry, the inner child in me just had to quote this out of context.
But they grow on the ground? Suprised me when I first saw them.
This was something called a 'jungle pineapple'. Same size, maybe a bit bigger. Fell from the trees out where my hotel grounds met the beach.
It was a little bit like that scene from castaway with T.Hanks. Something fell near me and I'm thinking wtf was that, then one landed on me.
I suppose thats what you get for moving the sun loungers.
Sporting a big bruise and asking the staff was reminded. "Careful, they fall out of the tree".
Maybe a pandanus?
Not riding, gridding up for an NPS XC race in the late 90's.
Second row i think, 50+ people behind me on a slightly uphill slope, so *very* visible.
A seagull emptied itself on me just as the starter announced "30 seconds to go". Everyone laughed at me.
Latest was non-bike, but a seagull used me as target practice on Saturday and got a bullseye direct hit on my Garmin watch on my wrist. Bit of a lucky escape really, could've been a LOT worse especially as the ricochet splattered away from me reather than towards.
Deleted wrong thread

There you go, I was blissfully unaware of it at the time…I say unaware, felt like something large had fallen from a tree or something.
Well, it had…quite a surprise when I got home…