[Closed] Getting shouted at whilst commuting.

Sounds harmless enough.
I'd given him a cheery thumbs up.

That's a doozy of a line - wish I'd thought of that!

I had recently 'hay Lance, want some drugs?' Which is a little more up to date I guess?

Twice I have had "how much is your bike worth mrs", both in Sheffield commuting and once in Manchester where I'd stopped to check directons. Makes me feel uneasy and then I pedal faster.

When I was a paperboy , I used to shout "Mr,your back wheel is going round." what japes.
Have recently been referred to by some kids as "faggot". 🙁

Why do kids tell you stuff about your back wheel? Is there a joke I'm missing?

Makes a nice change from the normal abuse

There appears to be a section of society who just can't help shouting at any moving cyclist, be they pedestrian or in a car. They appear excited and just yawp whatever words are in their head. The defining feature of them ime is they are thick and simple, but generally harmless.

My favourite going past a bus stop with some scallies in it was 'Get a bus you tight c***'

About to enter some park land on a night ride. Group of girls sat on bench pipe up with...
"I hope you get raped up the arse"
Was quite stunned at the time and failed spectacularly in thinking of a witty response so just carried on with a shake of the head. Made me smile afterwards though the little sods.

I've had a girl reach out the passenger window and pinch my arse as her mate drove past . 😆

Never been shouted out, but once had a bunch of chavs drive past in a corsa and launch a McDonalds milkshake at me, it was strawberry flavoured.

@RDL-82 - would it have been inappropriate to say "you first" in those circumstances?

You clearly don't commute into London on the tube / on foot! It happens everyday, no idea why. I (and lots of others) was shouted at today just walking across London Bridge.

my fav from this morning 'f*** off back to p**i land!'scaffolder lorry on Kensington High Street

"Another f***ing tour de tw**ter" I actually found quite amusing around the time of the wiggins victory cycling boom.

"It's going round.....like yer Mum" would be a suitable response.

When I was a paperboy , I used to shout "Mr,your back wheel is going round." what japes.

The correct response to this is: "So's your mum!"

I like this.

Nothing original. Wolf whistled by a car load of girls who squirmed with embarrassment when I caught them at the lights, and 'go on wiggo' from a middle aged lady from the passenger seat of a car passing me. Men, and men in vans in particular just seem to try to run me over 😥

[i]"Bike w@nker"[/i] courtesy of the yoofs hanging around outside the post office

I generally, if I'm in a good mood, blow these types of commentators kisses and tell them i love them, i sometimes do when they are aggressive but mostly that puts me in bad mood and i get abusive back.

last week I checked over my shoulder before manoevering across a wide road as there was a roundabout coming up where I turn right, the cars were a long way back, so I signalled and moved across towards the middle of the lane... a car then decided he would speed up close the gap but i had right of way and had signalled, he undertook and told me to signal properly next time?? its a bumpy section of road you cant signal easily in the first place and not right up to the roundabout... so I showed him a better clearer signal which he would understand. One finger! He wasnt happy.

EDIT: I do wish I had a handy collection of smart replies when somebody hurls abuse, I usually fail to come back with anything of value.

"You could choke your chicken on that!" When riding a recumbent through Glasgow.

Think you get funny comments on a normal bike? They're nothing to what you get on recumbents 😉

Monday I had a young scally come up with:

"Bicuckle"

To be fair he was about 3 y.o. Little git.

Some kids still say the coolest things like "I like you bike, mister".

I've even had a 'race' with a random 7/8 yr old who came tearing out of his garden on his 20" jobby. He span like mad for about 100yds then collapsed 🙂 Good lad.

TBH all of the abuse I can remember comes when I'm running. And always from teenage boys in cars IIRC.

One thing I've also noticed is that in certain areas of disrepute, teenage boys riding towards me (say on a path) will often ride straight at me and not move an inch to go round, thus forcing me be the one to manouvre round them. Methinks they're happy to stack their (quite likely already nicked) £150 Halfords jobby into what they expect is going to be some expensive bling machine in the hope they can jump on it and ride off. I'm almost tempted to move aside and side-kick the next one that does this - which probably makes me a v bad man.

Riding past the City of Manchester stadium(or whatever its called this week)
Bunch of Scrotes in a car do a U-turn from the other side of the road,pull alongside and proceed to squirt me with a Super Soaker water pistol/gun,accelerate off and then do the same to a woman at the bus stop 100yds further on.

Pretty stunned at first but then kind of grateful as it was a red hot day.

Pretty stunned at first but then kind of grateful as it was a red hot day.

It was probably wee. Still lovely and cooling though.

Not gonna lie, a lot of stuff in this thread is certified hilarious.

Why do kids tell you stuff about your back wheel? Is there a joke I'm missing?

It's in the hope that you'll do a panicked look at the back wheel without thinking, and then crash.

What a nice society we live in.

This morning, I got "We've got to stop meeting like this" from a young lady who I kept exchanging places with, going into That Lahndaahn... 😀

I suppose it's better than being gobbed on by some scrotes while passing under a canal bridge. I had that last thursday :/

The little sods didn't know what hit them when I sneakily looped back to the bridge 2 minutes later and released a 20mph cold-laden snot rocket in revenge 😈
I hope a lesson was learned, but I doubt it.

riding into work one cold wet morning, there was a bus behind me waiting to pull in to the stop i was approaching....there was a chinese lady stood at the stop waiting for the bus....as i rode past her she said in a very polite but somewhat condescending tone "pedal faster"....

I've had a girl reach out the passenger window and pinch my arse as her mate drove past

I had this once, followed by them committing a getting caught at traffic lights fail.

Window still open, so I leaned on the car and said "is that your way of asking for a date"?

EDIT: also somebody threw an orange at me once, which at least makes a change for the usual fast food detritus.

"Daddy!" from a 2-yr old waiting with his mum at the bus stop.

I'm convinced there's some sort of University of Chav Comedy where after a year's hard graft and revision, the more intelligent chavs can graduate knowing two stock jokes to shout at cyclists:
'ere mate, yer wheels are goin' round!
and
Oi, mate, yer back wheel's following the front!

Those are the only two jokes and I've heard them in all manner of places, it's not just a regional thing. The amazing thing though is how funny they find it. Not just funny but literally rolling on the floor laughing. ChavGirls within earshot will spontaneously get pregnant on hearing ChavBoy's wit and erudition. Lower grade chavs will fall in worship at the feet of Alpha Chav who has shouted this hilarity.

Unbelievable.

Recently though, they are beginning to move with the times a little bit, I had a "GO WIGGO, YEAH!!" a little while ago.

Never been shouted out, but once had a bunch of chavs drive past in a corsa and launch a McDonalds milkshake at me, it was strawberry flavoured

I've had the same Strawberry MCD Milkshake thrown over me too - must be something too sweet for the chavs to finish it

Cycling home near bonfire night years ago had a firework fired from a plastic down pipe hit my helmet and melt a bit out shocked the hell out of me - pesky kids

I've had a girl reach out the passenger window and pinch my arse as her mate drove past

I had this happen once, too. I almost fell off. 😳

I must be too boring - I have been commuting in London about 8 years and honestly can't remember ever getting shouted at. 🙁

Used to get shouted at quite a lot when running, but not so much with cycling.

I have had a load of food chucked at me from an overtaking car & people passing closely and tooting their horn.

at least you didn't get stabbed.

Why do kids tell you stuff about your back wheel? Is there a joke I'm missing?

It's in the hope that you'll do a panicked look at the back wheel without thinking, and then crash.

What a nice society we live in.

We also used to call the operator from a phone box and ask if that was the operator on the line? Followed by 'well you'd better get off cos there's a train coming' which was generally very poorly delivered as we were too busy giggling hysterically.

On the very rare occasion I get shouted at it's usually an irate driver, and I've never had my bottom pinched whilst riding.

We used to shout 'Oi mate, your back wheels going round' as kids. It's a 'hehe, made you look' pun, I thought everone did it.
My favourite from a gent with his son in a Porshe Fat bloke on my commute home last summer 'Bloody hell mate, you're doing more than 40!' 😀
Least favourite, being hit in the side of the head by a half eaten Melton Mowbray.

got told once by a yob who drove too close for comfort "to get a car"
have to admit this thread is hilarious....

To my shame I now recall a 'little' incident we dreamed up as kids. We only did this to cars so no cyclists were harmed. 😀

Timing was everything....one of us would go to the other side of the road and as the car approached we'd both 'pretend' to pull on an imaginary rope.

Most drivers would just drive by laughing but I do remember one old lady hit the anchors big style and ended up doing a rather long loud screechy skid (probably on her seat too!)....we basically crapped ourselves and bolted! 😳 Funny now but if any of my kids ever did this I'd skin them alive!

I once had several 'empty' coke cans thrown at me from a passing car...it was in Dundee so that's not altogether surprising. 😉

The best one liner has to be from a builders site in Glasgow as I cycled by "...the last time I saw a pair of legs like that, they were hanging out of a poachers bag..." 😆

I once had someone lean out of a car and shout "118 got your number"

Which was strange as I don't have a moustache or ride in a running vest.

Made me laugh though.

Had the back wheel jokes a few time too

I usually get the hilarious yet hurtful 'BWAAAARGH!!!'

I've had a carful of girls shout 'nice arse' then get caught at the junction, made my day

I'm almost tempted to move aside and side-kick the next one that does this

I'd recommend a swift side-kick to the headtube. Works a treat.

Must be a regional thing, but I normally get 'here mister, your chain's flat'. I now keep a chain pump in my bag.

A little girl (about 7 or 8) shouted "Fag**t" last week.

Couldn't see who else she might have been shouting at, but maybe i'm paranoid and its a cool new trend in Finsbury.

senor j - Member
When I was a paperboy , I used to shout "Mr,your back wheel is going round." what japes.
Have recently been referred to by some kids as "faggot".

[img] [/img]

it's not just motorists and peds that do it, got shouted at by BMXers a few times while out on my MTB and while commuting, my favourite is still the time they yelled 'Oy mountain biker ****t! Gears are for Queers!' at me.... while I was riding a single speed 🙄

Have had the back wheel line before, and McDonalds thrown at me. And "Chris Hoy!". And most recently "get a f* cycle ya c*".... which I couldn't make any sense of.

I can't remember being shouted at here in sunny London, but I'd take that over the bmw that decided it wanted the exact bit of road that I was currently occupying and then moved into it without indicating. Lane discipline is something that happens to other people round here.

Had the BBBBLLLLLAAAAAHHHHH out of the window of a chavs Corsa, used to scare me but get used to it after a bit.

Had the wolf whistles out of a canal boat of drunken women so I stopped and asked them to get their **** out 8)

Stopped and helped a load of drunken women on said same canal as one of them had collapsed and got a kiss of about 6 of them when the Ambulance had arrived. I left as the Paramedic was looking scared of them..........

Been egged by some chavs in a Fiesta. Didn't know till I got home and took my Camalbak off.

On the average week I get beeped at or told to get off the f*in road a few times. Worst occasion was the guy who stopped and threatened me with a golf club, for reasons I still don't understand.

And slightly off topic but still funny, was the time I got chased by a dog for about half a mile. Every time I picked up the pace the dog did too, didn't want to slow down for fear of it jumping into my spokes. Still wonder how long it took for the owner to catch up with us.

I got shouted at today, by an pensioner/invalid in one if those electric carts.

He watched me come down the road (had extended eye contact), then when I got to 20m shot of the kerb in front of me. As I slammed on the brakes he called me an "idiot w@nker ". A short rebuff from me about a disability being no excuse for idiocy and I was on my way.

my mates were cycling home when a young lad leaned out of a passing car and wacked his arse with a horse whip ....he caught up with him at the next lights and decided against getting physical..... this was 200m from another mates place of work .... local police station.... after a quick phone call he left the driver and the whipper with the local armed response officers for company....sweet !

plyphon - Member
Not gonna lie, a lot of stuff in this thread is certified hilarious.

So much so should be a sticky!

Keep um coming!

A couple of years ago a car of chavs threw a pair of lacy knickers out of the window of their Saxo at the bunch I was riding in. It made me laugh.:-) Made a change from the usual random abuse.

FROGLEEK - Member

Never been shouted out, but once had a bunch of chavs drive past in a corsa and launch a McDonalds milkshake at me, it was strawberry flavoured

I've had the same Strawberry MCD Milkshake thrown over me too - must be something too sweet for the chavs to finish it

+3 only mine was banana. Plus they did it about 500m from their house. I know where you live.....

Approaching a parked CHAVECTRA,the woman driver flung open the door and in chav scouse shouted DICKEAD at me, i just smiled,stopped a bit higher up the road to write the details down, and as she drove past, a tatooed oaf, shouted out the window, DICKHEAD again in a chav scouse accent, i just waved back.

Must be a new form of welcome i was unaware of 🙂

[quote=Kato said]Plus they did it about 500m from their house. I know where you live.....

revenge is a [s]dish[/s] milk shake best served cold.

The correct response to a long tirade of abuse:

"I am dreadfully sorry would you remind repeating all that I am rather deaf"

This will either get a laugh or promote a degree of apoplexy that either causes them to smack you good and proper or induce a rise in blood pressure sufficient to blow their arteries off their heart.

I cannot claim credit for the line (I think it comes from a book originally) but it is a particular favourite.

The correct responce to abuse (rather than something genuinely funny of course) is:

Male abuser: Slag off car
Female abuser: Call them fat

I quite often make comments to other cyclist who've gone through red lights when I catch them up... depending on the amount of time available it ranges from "you really should be more careful, you nearly knocked someone over back at those lights" to "you **** *"

every week or so.
last time was a guy who pulled straight out in front of me on a fast A road. told me I should look where I was going.
Just could not belive it and giggled at him shaking my head saying he was unbeliveable. he then screeched away telling me i was a **** and he was going to kick my arse and how I did not pay road tax etc etc.
I would have ad im I think.
got me in to work nearlt 5 mins early that one grrrrrr.
At least the into battle adrenalin gets used up on chain mashing grunting.

SE London yesterday, I stopped at a pelican crossing for a mother & child. Guy behind me shot through, missing the woman & child by an inch. She shouted at him as he rode on. I pull level and said he'd nearly hit the woman & child to which he replied: "F* off you c, it's not of your f**** business. F off I'll have you, you f** c* etc etc etc."

I need to learn to ignore other road users bad behaviour and just keep out of their way. Sometimes I'm a sanctimonious tw*t.

Again SE London: commuting, cleared my runny snotter by the usual means and a woman in a saab pulls up next to me and lowers her window;
She says "that's disgusting"
I reply "its got a lot to do with what's coming out of your exhaust pipe"
She screeches back "get a mask then". Fair point I suppose.

Not commuting but heading over from Rivington to Belmont recently a guy working in one of the fields started loudly calling me "Lance Armstrong" and repeated it until I was out of earshot - which took a while as it was at the steepest bit.

He only paused to laugh at his own cleverness.

Also heading from Anglezarke into Chorley, and going quite swiftly up a short climb some schoolkids ran across the road in front and I heard one say "he's rapid like".

🙂

got hooted at by a fat bloke in an Astra yesterday. Not sure why, think he was signalling his inner hurt

once got followed by a van full of lads on an undulating fast bit who sat about 6 ft off my back wheel and yelled out my speed every 20 seconds. A bit unnerving, but quite friendly I suppose. Got a cheer when I finally couldn't maintian a decent speed anymore and they over took

They can shout whatever they damn well like at me

[IMG] [/IMG]

Think you get funny comments on a normal bike? They're nothing to what you get on [s]recumbents[/s] unicycles

Though a lot of them are variations on "where's your other wheel" and not all that funny. I suppose it is my own fault for doing something which attracts attention.

might be some bloke on here but recently when I was commuting on the mtb for more grip in the ice there's a bloke passes me coming the opposite way on his bike shouts "COTIC" as he's seen I'm on the soul.

I just nodded a few times, then one day shouted 'SODA' back, as this appeared to be his vehicle. not seen him since. shame as I want to bellow it again. 😀

I quite often make comments to other cyclist who've gone through red lights when I catch them up... depending on the amount of time available it ranges from "you really should be more careful, you nearly knocked someone over back at those lights" to "you **** *"

Plus it makes this whole thread less fun, cause frankly if a cyclist RLJ and is nowhere near a pedestrian/ other vehicle, what does it matter to you?

might be some bloke on here but recently when I was commuting on the mtb for more grip in the ice there's a bloke passes me coming the opposite way on his bike shouts "COTIC" as he's seen I'm on the soul.

My particular favorite is when a chap/chav got up from the sofa that was placed in his wrecked front garden, sauntered to the side of the road where about 15 MTBers were pootling along, connecting trails, and with bifta in one hand and can of Fosters in t'other shouted at us -
" What the flook are you lot doing,FFS? Get a flooking life!"
Priceless.

" What the flook are you lot doing,FFS? Get a flooking life!"

had similar on a friday night ride, going through some town or another on the isle of wight.

some lad starts shouting "what are you doing? it's friday night, why don't you go and do something fun?"

I love a night on the piss, but it's sad if you can't see that anything else might be 'fun'.

Get the usual bellowing as people drive past, novelty has worn off now.

People hanging out of the passenger side of cars telling me to get a car are also a favorite, usual response is, “same to you". Usually gets them to pipe down.

Worst one was when I was out on road bike with my girlfriend, couple of girls in an open top beetle drove past and squirted us with super soakers. It shocked my girlfriend and she almost went into the kerb, the red mist descended, I caught up with them at the junction and dumped a litre bottle filled with High5 Zero over the pair of them and the cream leather interior.

Was worried after the adrenaline wore off (criminal damage etc) but saw them in the same car the next day and they looked sheepish and ignored me!

dumped a litre bottle filled with High5 Zero over the pair of them and the cream leather interior.

Pah, that's basically water, SIS Go or something I imagine would be horrible. Or High5 4:1 which absolutely reeks when it's a bit stale because of the whey protein in it!

I very rarely get shouted at, feeling left out now!