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I have a touring wheel that's gotten really flexy - any power sends the rim onto the brake pad. It's about 4 years old and been a decent servant - from spa cycles so it was well built initially. Knowing very little about wheel-building, is it worth me tightening every spoke the same amount and seeing if that improves things? Or is that wrong / not worth doing as it needs rebuilding?
You need to examine it very carefully to establish why it has become slack - stretched spokes? Distorted eyelets? What is the condition of the hub flanges? If everything looks in good order, tighten away by an even amount on each nipple, say half a turn each until it seems tight enough. It would help to lube the nipples from the inside and the outside first with some light oil. Remember also that turning the nipples will twist each spoke you you need to develop the technique of turning the nipple so that it actually turns on the spoke then turning it back by a quarter turn or so to de-stress the spoke. This might not be necessary until your final session around the rim and you will also need to stress-relieve the spokes by pressing the axle against the floor and pressing down on the rim at opposing quarters so as to allow the spokes to ping back and settle. Do this for both sides.
Apart from getting the wheel trued up, you will need to pay attention to the dish. The rim needs to be central between the dropouts and you can keep track on this by making a simple dishing gauge from a piece of wood batten with three small bolts or screws through the middle and the ends, so that they press on the axle and the rim. By adjusting them and a bit of fiddling around you will be able to get the rim central.
spokes don't stretch.
eyelets don't distort.
flanges either split or function perfectly.
Otherwise as above, just tighten it up, lube on nipples and threads will help. You can use the bike as a dishing tool.