[Closed] 39 ways to win friends while mountain biking

12. I don't have a trail dog (at the moment)

14. Should be, ALWAYs turn up at a ride with a dirty bike. Too busy riding to clean my bikes that often.

Helps out on dig days
Is fully versed in the mountain bike slang dictionary
Will ride man made and natural trails

Each to their own but not massive fan of non natural trails though I do ride them every now and agin

Whilst those 39 are very worthy, I can think of a dozen that'll trump then all if produced from the back of the van at the end of a ride.

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My list is:
they turn up
they have money for cake

Lends an inner tube to a rider with a puncture

Very much depends on circumstances but I'd rarely lend a tube to a stranger because that would leave me with a long walk if I punctured later.

40. On group rides during rest stops, mechanical failures and general faffing, constantly touch yourself on the genitals whilst staring blankly at other group members..

I've made some good friends that way

Clickbait bollocks to try and generate advertising revenue.

Well you're not a perfect modern mountain biker then, Jon - it's Ok to admit it.

I don't have and will never have a trail dog - TBH I'm not quite sure why that makes it onto the list, nothing against well behaved ones, but I don't see how not having one makes you a worse rider, or how having one contributes to other people's experiences.

14 - pah!

Isn't a snob about wheel sizes...

...but complains incessantly that every oem spec'd bike has very stupidly narrow bars and excessively long stems. 😛

7/ Is capable of justifying spending more on a bike than they would on a car. [i]Nope ,not really[/i]

12/ Has a trail dog .[i]Don't want one[/i]

14/ Never turns up to a ride with a dirty bike. [i]Aye right[/i] 🙄

16/ Has a legendary collection of elbow scars.[i]Nope,and don't plan to have any[/i]

27/ Would never accept a squeaky chain. [i]Yeah,miles from home I would phone for a lift rather than put up with the noise[/i]

31/ Is fully versed in the mountain bike slang dictionary. [i]What?[/i]

39/ Knows that flapjack is the best trail snack [i][b]WRONG[/b][/i]

but I don't see how not having one makes you a worse rider, or how having one contributes to other people's experiences.

Most people like dogs and like having them around?

I don't get the clean bike thing though. Unless all three of the following apply, the bike stays dirty;
a) someones giving me a lift
b) they haven't got a bike rack
c) the trail has bike washing facilities to clean it for the return journey.

41. Owns a Volkswagen T5 and knows how to reverse it
42. Generous enough to buy a parking ticket at their local trail centre

Is capable of justifying spending more on a bike than they would on a car.
Has a trail dog.
Never turns up to a ride with a dirty bike.
Has a legendary collection of elbow scars.
Is fully versed in the mountain bike slang dictionary.

Why? None of those have any bearing on what I think of a person. The rest seem fair enough though.

aracer - Member

Well you're not a perfect modern mountain biker then, Jon - it's Ok to admit it.

Has a legendary collection of elbow scars.

12, 14, 27, 30, 38 are my flaws...

My manager looked at my arm yesterday, as it happens, and asked why it was multi-coloured and covered in scars. I've got plenty on there but three crashes in quick succession have just added to the damage.

One of the benefits of being management and looking like you are bearing the scars of a tribal initiation is no one asks / cares if I've been hurting myself. 😛

I don't think I know anyone who turns up on a clean bike.

I've got the scars, but not the dog, or the clean bike.

I'm also a sociopath so have no need to win friends. 🙂

PS Do badly lubed chains squeak? I always thought they just rattled. It's my pedals that squeak.

Anyone who calls their ******* 'DOG' a trail dog gets immediately booted in the vag by all riders in the assemblage.

I scored way better in the original Country Life list 🙂

booted in the vag

I think the MBR ones are a good basis. I would add: -

- Will help coach a stranger over a difficult sections
- Cheers on a fellow rider who is doing well
- Shares a snack with a buddy
- Has a 'All for one and one for all' attitude when out with riding buddies

Also, always starts a ride on a clean bike - but loves getting it dirty!

[i]12. Has a trail dog[/i]

No. Pains in the arse. No such thing as a perfectly behaved dog. theocb is right. They're just dogs who run vaguely behind their owners.

[i]26. Won’t mock another rider for walking a section of trail[/i]

But how will they ever improve 🙂

[i]28. Understands that their significant other may not be as excited by mountain bikes as they are[/i]

[s]Understands that their significant other[/s] Is confused that anyone may not be as excited by mountain bikes as they are.

[i]32. Will ride man made and natural trails[/i]

My one day riding of man-made trails was a massive disappointment. Don't see what the fuss is about, tbh.

40. Always has a bag of haribo to pass around at the top of the last climb, to fuel the last descent.

Generally a good list.

- Will help coach a stranger over a difficult sections

- Cheers on a fellow rider who is doing well

- Shares a snack with a buddy

- Has a 'All for one and one for all' attitude when out with riding buddies

😀

Oooh it's been ages since I've had flapjack out on the trail.

Also,
Won’t mock another rider for walking a section of trail

Is only adhered to when the other rider doesn't want mocking - for instance a ride I was on a bit ago one very capable rider walked a section, everyone else was being nice to him but I could see it was eating away at him that he had walked it, and he was feeling patronised by the sympathy for walking it, so I mocked him until he went back and did it... It was for the greater good...

I think it ok to mock friends [ its almost the law]but I would not mock someone i did not know.