This article is from Issue 136 of Singletrack World.
Hannah crosses the paper/internet boundary to unearth some of the truth behind a few of the Singletrack Forum personas we know as ‘The Big Hitters’.
Words Hannah Photography Various
If you’ve hung around our Forum for any length of time you may well have come across the term ‘Big Hitters’. It’s one that’s often uttered with fondness and respect, but equally comes with connotations of too much time spent on the internet. A few Forum threads have sought to identify and define a ‘Big Hitter’ and, while we have referenced this source material in the research for this article, as the overlords dwelling in Singletrack Towers, we’ve taken a few executive decisions in deciding who to include – or exclude – here.
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What we hope you find in the pages that follow is the sense of community that brings Singletrack readers together. It’s (probably) the mountain biking that brings you here, but it’s the patter that keeps you coming back. Many of the Big Hitters have been here since the beginning, or before The Great Hack, (when, one Christmas, a teenage hacker took down the entire site and we lost all that history). But it’s not just time served that makes you a Big Hitter – there’s how much you say, what you say, and whether you start a conversation or just argue on others’ threads. There are a few worthy of a mention who aren’t in the pages that follow. There’s no Binners. We decided that we wanted to bring you the people behind the usernames, who don’t already exist in our mind’s eye through other means. So, despite his services to pies and crayons, Binners is too otherwise-famous to be included here. Scotroutes is similarly a bit too well known – he’s one of those rare breed who has a regularly updated blog.
McMoonter is practically a Forum meme – as MoreCashThanDash (another contender) once said: “Every time my therapist helps me get my life back on track, McMoonter pops up with another amazing lifestyle thread.” Perchypanther is another who could easily have been included for his endless (and unnervingly quick) comedy responses.
It’s not all bikes, fun and log piles though, and the Forum is a place that sees many through tough times. TiRed has brought science and reason to the Covid thread. Gnusmas has brought his heart of gold to many a Forumite in need, and the Forum has rallied to his aid too. There are more – like Bullheart, Simon F Barnes, and Soulrider – whose lives on and off the Forum brought inspiration and joy to many before their fingers tapped those keyboards one last time. So many lives enriched through relationships forged in a virtual world, and occasionally cemented in the real one.
What we’ve got for you here is a curated selection of Big Hitters. They’re mostly old-timers, from the days before The Great Hack, though not exclusively. Some are universally sweet and lovely and helpful, others have our wonderfully patient team of Moderators biting their nails. Some we approached didn’t want to risk losing the anonymity that the Forum affords. And before anyone stages a ‘flounce’* (have we had a really good one of them recently?), non-inclusion doesn’t mean you’re not a Big Hitter. It’s just that the pages of a magazine are limited. Luckily for you, the internet is bottomless. There will always be room for you there, and here, in our Singletrack society. Let us meet some of its citizens.
*a flounce: “A finely honed swansong post which succinctly put down all my detractors, whilst winning the admiration and respect of others like me.” – thanks to CharlieMungus for that definition.
Bunnyhop
Bunnyhop lurked in the Forum a while before joining husband NBT in the fray in 2006. Back then though it was husband-to-be, and she was riding a Santa Cruz Juliana. “A lovely blue machine which was in fact my engagement present, as I didn’t want a ring.” There is so much to be happy about in that sentence. The promising start seems to have continued, as these days they’re often out together on the tandem (on the road). With an emphasis on riding from their door, Bunnyhop says the big epic days out on the mountain bike are in the past, but a local pootle a few times a week with good friends is all her heart desires.
Unlike some here, she’s clearly a reader of the magazine. “My favourite article ever is Samuri’s article about injuries, including waking up sticking to the bed sheets due to oozing, with an honourable mention for one written by a big hitter ‘Binners’. He’s someone I’ve known for many years; I’ve been mtbing with him many times. He’s a funny, kind, burly Northerner, who ended up with depression and was brave enough to write about his experiences of this in a copy of Singletrack Magazine. I truly believe this article helped many.”
She’d advise her younger self to “go for the best I could afford. I went through a few cheaper bikes before ‘the one’ came along – it was false economy.”
Favourite pie: My home-made fish pie. Made from fresh fish from the local fishmonger and with lots of fresh veg. Yum.
Cynic-Al
Cynic-Al joined the Forum while making the shift from bike shop wrench to solicitor, way back in 2003. It was he who coined the term ‘Big Hitters’. “At the time there was a hardcore of Forum members who engaged in ‘quite intense’ discussions (myself included). It amused me to think that this arguing might be as important to people as prowess at bike riding, so I started calling it out as big hitting, but people didn’t (and some still don’t) accept it as just a laugh. There’s a big hitter in many of us.”
Those early years in bike shops have given his bike ownership history a smattering of the personal connections that so often come with bikes. There was the Ibis Mojo that he didn’t get on with. “My brother knew Scot Nicol and I got a deal just before Ibis went under [in the early 2000s]. I paid him direct, haha!” Around the time he joined the Singletrack Forum, he had a 1992 Fisher Prometheus as a single speed, a Trek Fuel and a Specialized Sirrus for the road, plus a Jamis hardtail that “I got from Jenson USA (the postage cost as much as the frame and it was still a great deal)”. These days he has a 2005 Shand, “from before he started up commercially (I knew him from working in bikes shops in the early 90s). I got to design it myself in the lightest tubing he could get and I got enough of that right to still be riding it, after breaking the ultralight chainstays.” He’s also got a Kona Kahuna, now built up as B+, but sometimes used as a cross/gravel bike, a Brompton, and Cannondale road and touring bikes. There are a couple that got away though. “I passed on a Fisher Paragon – super light steel – for a Stumpjumper Epic. Given I now love my light pre-CEN steel Shand, I could have saved some cash and still be riding a Fisher. Also a Fat City Cycles Slim Chance. Road bikes from mountain bike companies are just cool.’
Favourite pie: Macaroni, deep fried.
Kryton57
Kryton has been in the Forum since the earliest days, but doesn’t think of himself as a “lifelong cyclist”, having come to it “after physios told me I should never play rugby/impact sports again after injury at 26, so some of the histories beyond 2000 escape me”. Although he likes to race and, indeed, can on occasion be found in London Phoenix Cycle Club Lycra between the race tapes, he talks of the experience of riding as being the draw, rather than the kit. “Rather than a specific bike, what I really want is the cycling nirvana of the fun, cosseting and faithful companion that’ll allow me to get out and forget about everything else – a bike without needing foibles and fettling to ride that’ll reward my personality.”
It’s the articles that reflect that search for ‘the moment’ that appeal to him the most, tales of “glorious views and drifting thought with enjoyable company and, as a naturally highly strung person, I’m very much drawn to those articles and dream of that perfect sun-strewn landscape. I’ve achieved that once in fact at the top of one of the Afan climbs in 2002 – my first Welsh trail centre experience, where I can remember the sun beaming down on me and the valleys below and me experiencing a huge sense of satisfaction with the world as I scanned the horizon to take in a landscape far excelling my achievement of scaling the rocky trails. But it’s addictive – I want that again!”
If you’ve encountered Kryton in the Forum, this search for sunlit uplands and nirvana might not be what you expected. “I’m a natural defensive introvert with anxiety issues and perhaps worse – a very dry sense of humour! Various personal issues led me to enter my adult life less aware of others’ interpretation of me, and being kicked around the STW Forum for a bit I’ve learned that putting some of that humour together with a quick reaction forces my vocabulary to appear narcissistic, intolerant and entitled at times. Being introspective I’ve missed [the] close friendships through life which may have helped with balance, and it’s that balance I’m slowly learning to adopt in all aspects of life. TLDR: I’m actually a pretty normal average person with a limited social ability. I’m not deliberately trying to be an Ar$e, but it takes effort on my part and a lot of the time I get it wrong; please be patient with me.”
Favourite pie: Mince pie(s), but only in off-season and Christmas of course!
Molgrips
If you want a reasoned answer, Molgrips is your man. “I always try to set people straight as I can’t abide misconceptions. I do think that some people think I’m in denial about how much cake I eat, but I can assure you that I am well aware!”
There’s cake in his bike history too, though not necessarily in good way. “I honestly think that those early bikes were poor – which is to be expected, as they were early. Having gone back and ridden old bikes the memories all came back – flexy frames, front wheels much too close, every corner being a battle to stop the front wheel washing out… it wasn’t good. I remember how floppy and knackered the rear mech on my first bike was (Exage in 1992) for most of the time I had it, I remember how much I struggled to get brakes that worked reliably; I went through many combinations of brake pads and brakes to try to get something that worked – and I only had it two years! Other than that, in terms of really badly designed stuff – the Gary Fisher Cake was probably the worst bike (although it had good features). It was a strange sort of bike, 5in of travel but cross-country geometry. This made it good for stuff like marathon racing, but also pretty good at tipping you over the bars. I could learn to deal with that for the nice cross-country benefits, but it was poorly implemented as the swingarm was extremely flexible and the bearings lasted about three months. You could pull the back wheel and watch the shock being twisted sideways. It filled a very, very small niche but was treacherous when it came to other sorts of riding.”
Worst kit: I’d like to nominate most of the mudguards I’ve owned.
Favourite pie: Chicken and ham.
Northwind
The internet might feel like a passing place of impermanence, but the Forum has proved to have a long memory. It was only a couple of years after joining that Northwind posted a picture showing a bike maintenance mistake he’d made: he fitted his fork – and bar and stem – upside down. Quite a feat, and one he swears was achieved sober. This image regularly resurfaces on the Forum and was immortalised in the charity ‘Gnarpoon’ T-shirt made and sold by Forum member AlexSimon. The word ‘gnarpoon’ itself is thought to have been coined by Northwind. “AlexSimon did all the work and deserves all the credit, but it was fun to be part of and very cool to see randoms walking around Alp d’Huez with them on.”
Two Forum memes is quite the impact for a relative latecomer by the standards of many of the Big Hitters here – Northwind joined the Forum in 2009. Are there any gnarpoons in his bike collection? He’s a serial Cotic owner (seven so far), but is broad in his bike tastes, currently owning a Trek Remedy 29, a Calibre Dune fat bike, an Orange 224-Evo, and a Cotic SolarisMAX. The love doesn’t extend to the Ellsworth Dare downhill bike he once owned. “The ugliest bike I’ve ever seen and it rode worse than it looked.”
With the Tweed Valley not far away, he’s lucky enough to have access to great riding and a wealth of knowledge to help him find his way through the sport. “I was lucky enough to have great advice from great friends, especially Chris L and the other Glentress Trailfairies, who’ve mostly kept me straight.” His advice to his younger self would be” “Don’t be afraid of downhill”. For ages I did that thing where I was this sort of rider not that sort and I was pretty lucky that enduro racing came along and showed me that it’s all just mountain biking.”
Favourite Pie: I have coeliac disease, so, it’s the humble’ but indispensable’ ‘Too Good To Be Gluten Free’ pork pie.
TJAgain
The ‘Again’ in this name is reference to the fact that the original TandemJeremy was banned from the Forum, but underwent a vanishingly rare period of rehabilitation and re-entered the fold. What is it about the Forum that made it worth the effort of getting back in? “One key thing for me is that STW is not an echo chamber, unlike Facebook for example or even real-life conversations with pals, thus it’s very good for getting perspective on social things. I sometimes float ideas on here knowing that I will get a breadth of views and that people will not feel a need to be restrained or polite. All my pals are leftie hippy types – so to hear points of view that differ is important.” That TJ welcomes a different perspective might surprise a few, but he says: “I am not as angry as some folk think. When I joined the Forum I was brand new to social media and made a lot of mistakes in posting style that has led to this [misconception].”
If his friends are hippies, we might also suspect he is as well. “Green credentials are important to me. Virtually everything I own is second-hand. I also view my bikes as tools to go places not as an object on its own… hence I have zero interest in kit/upgrades/brands.” He also has no interest in articles and says he’s never read one! His Cannondale tandem – which he’ll be pushed into saying hosts his favourite bit of kit, the Rohloff hub – has stayed with him from those first days on the Forum. A very old Marin hardtail back then has been replaced with a 90s Raleigh Ti and a Salsa Beargrease. “There is no bike I wish I had owned. I am not a gearhead.”
The kit might not interest him, but the mountains do. A decade ago he’d do a 30–40 mile loop from home up into the Pentlands, solo. These days a typical ride would be a 30–50 mile gravel route on the tandem. “I ride as much as I want. Lockdown has kept me local though – I’ve not been into the mountains for a year now and that is beginning to irk me.”
Fave pie? Lochinver Larder apple and strawberry.
Ton
Ton has been around since the beginning, but as he’s been a little less active on the Forum (and busier riding bikes) these days he seemed very surprised to be included in this list. Over the years though he’s acquired a reputation for being one of the good guys, and there are thousands of threads started by him and posts made that demonstrate this. Some of them are just checking in and saying hello – often an opportunity for others to share a little warm glow of connection in their day – and all his posts have the same lower case short sentence style that makes them seem like little haikus or poems rather than just Forum posts:
Just a message
i dont come on here much nowadays.
but i think of all the ace folk i have met through this forum.
and i would just like to say, i hope every single one of you are keeping safe and well.
and hopefully our paths will meet again in the future.
keep well everyone.
These days he says: “I have lost all my need for anything techy.” And, whereas in the past a good day was a big day in the Lakes, “four passes on hardtails kind of stuff”, now he likes a good long cross-country route or “dare I say gravel route on good tracks and lanes”. He’s ridden all sorts of bikes and would encourage everyone to ride as many as they can, though perhaps not a Gary Fisher Fat Possum bike which “rode like a wobbly jelly on a paper plate”. Having been a one-bike guy for a while, his Surly Disc Trucker has recently been joined by a Salsa Fargo Ti with his favourite bit of kit: a Rohloff hub. It’s the first time he’s had a carbon fork, a titanium frame or a tubeless set up – “so far all i can say is it is very comfy… a magic carpet ride”.
Favourite pie: A pork pie with tomato sauce and a cuppa.
Tracey
Tracey is one of those riders for whom mountain biking has become a life-changing affair; her relationship with Singletrack started back in about 2003. “I saw an article about a company called Bike Verbier who were having a Ladies week and always being one for throwing myself in at the deep end I decided I wanted to give it a try. Little did I know at that time how the experience I had with them would have a big effect on mine and my family’s life. We went back a year later as a family and the passion escalated from there.”
That passion has led to daughter Abigale Lawton racing EWS rounds around the world, as well as enduro and downhill races in the UK. Abigale might have Tracey to thank for sparking the interest, but it seems the favour hasn’t always been repaid. A recommendation to try DMR V-Twins didn’t go well. “Abigale convinced me that I would be better off clipped in. Probably not a good idea when the first run was Rollercoaster in Finale. By the end of the day I was battered and bruised, the worst day’s riding I have ever had. Next day was back on flats and Five Tens. Never tried them again.”
Her advice on bike buying? “Buy with your heart and not your head, buy last year’s model in the sale, most of the problems should have been sorted by then.”
Favourite pie: Homemade meat and potato pie with mushy peas and Henderson’s Relish.
Big Hitting
Sometimes it can feel like riding bikes has to be an all-consuming lifestyle for you to be ‘a mountain biker’ or ‘a cyclist’. Talking to people for this article, it’s been interesting to see how many of them didn’t think they’re ‘enough of a rider’ to warrant inclusion. To me, that’s nonsense. Being a mountain biker has, in my opinion, little to do with how many bikes you have, or how far and how often you ride. It’s more about the appreciation of the happiness riding bikes off-road can bring, and the friendships that can be formed over them. It’s about sharing your experience – good and bad – so others can enjoy their rides too. Bikes and riding bring people to the Forum, but it’s their wider lives that keep it going. The DIY problems, the gardening tips, the relationships and the legal advice (IANAL). We’re riders, and we’re people. Whether you’re an aspiring Big Hitter or a strict lurker, thanks to all of you for being part of the Singletrack community.
You already know, but: singletrackworld.com/forum – see you there!
